My Fucked Up Heart
by MissKirei
Summary: Chapter 21: Blonde Hair: He puts his hand on top of me, stopping me from taking the thing off. He's embracing me from the back and I can feel his breathe on my neck. I open my mouth to say something but he sighs as he pushes my hair to the side. "Shut up Misaki, don't ruin it."
1. Prologue

**MY FUCKED UP HEART**

 **By- Miss_Kirei**

 **Hey guys! Here's the gift-fic I promised! Those who don't know about it, I promised to post a gift-fic if I won one award on the Maid Sama! Fanfiction Awards 2016. And I didn't win one…I won five! So I guess I owe this to you guys!**

 ** _This is a plot that has been on my mind for a while now, but I wasn't able to write it since it is a very_** difficult ** _story. I wanted to share a glimpse of the story with you all. All questions, discussions regarding the plot are happily welcome. I aim to prove that the characters aren't as perfect as they are shown in the anime/manga. We all have our inner demons, and so does Takumi. This story is rated T at the moment, but if you feel that it is inappropriate, do tell. I will change the rating to M. I do want to point out that this IS a Takumi x Misaki story, not Takumi x Original Character so please be patient with me._**

 **PROLOGUE**

 _Thud!_

He pushes me against the wall, and presses his body on to mine. I look at him with hazy eyes, he holds my chin and kisses me fully on the lips. I shudder as the kiss ignites something in me. _I want more_ , I eagerly run my hand through his hair, something I have wanted to do for ages. He looks at me with a devious smirk as he grabs both of my hands and holds them behind me, my flushed cheek is rubbed against the cold wall as he turns me around. He holds my hair and pushes them forward, and kisses me at the center of my spine, my nerves are on fire with his kisses, and I squirm under his hold. His hand wraps itself around my waist and the other disappears.

I am turned around again as our gazes lock again. _This is totally crazy and fucking maddening_ , I think. He kisses me again, holding my hands over my head so that I can't try any _funny business_. God, I have never been kissed this way before. He takes his sweet time as he holds my chin in place with one hand, other busy with my wrists. He bites my lower lip when I try to kiss him back. He smiles deviously at me, almost pitying me, as he kisses me fully on the lips again. A moan escapes my mouth before I form any coherent thought, his hand is inside my shirt, tracing the underside of my breast. I can't remember how and when he snaked his hand inside my shirt, all I can think of is how _good_ this feels. My knees turn to jelly as he kisses my neck, his skilled fingers teasing my soft, sensitive skin as he continues his torture. He hasn't touched my breasts yet, but I'm too dazed to care. He has completely dominated me. He pities me, and lets go of my hands, that are positively red by now. I pant for air as he steps back and looks at me as a painter does, when he finishes a masterpiece.

He awards me with a pleased grin on his face, and I look away. My heart hammers in my chest as I think about what the fuck just happened. This man, devil, completely subjugated me. I look at him, I want to wipe that stupid victorious grin off his face. I walk towards him with full intentions of making him lose. I grab a fistful of his shirt and pull him down, _he's too tall for me damn it_! He raises an amused eyebrow, and looks down at me. I take advantage of the situation and kiss him on the lips, a chuckle escapes from him as we kiss, and I look at him with a pout, "Really?" He's amused. Before I retort he picks me up like I am a feather and holds me against the wall, he lets go of me and holds me by my shoulder. His right leg parts both of my legs as he kisses my neck—hard.

I am breathless as I am attacked by his kisses—once again. But this time, it's worse, or the better. His leg parts my legs in such a way that I can't help but shiver in a pleasant way. The rough fabric of his jeans rubs against my thigh—my skirt is hiked up because of whatever is happening. My skin tingles at the contact and I realize how close he is to my—well, I refuse to think it out loud. He lets go of my neck and I'm almost relived, but then, he kisses me once more. I kiss him back, with my hands in his shirt, I may even have torn the buttons off his shirt from the sheer intensity of my hold, but I couldn't care less at the moment.

He moves away when breathing becomes hard, turns out he's breathless too, but not as much as me. He folds his arms in pride and male ego as he looks at me with a devious grin. Again, I am his masterpiece. I look at him with a flustered face and close my knees shut in frustration, damn it. "Come, I'll drop you home" he murmurs as he walks towards his beautiful and expensive car. I walk slowly behind him, my legs are still wobbly and my soul is still shaken.

Either my ex-boyfriends were complete douches or he's a sex-god, I think dryly as I look at myself in the rearview mirror. My face is complete red—lipstick smeared. My clothes are completely out of place, my hair looks like I just got fucked. Don't even get me started on the hickey sitting proudly on my neck. My body is on fire, and I am completely smitten by Takumi Walker.

 **Next update: very soon!**


	2. Chapter 1

**CHAPTER 1**

 **I did say I was gonna update very soon, didn't I? So here I am! Lol…I loved the response for the prologue…and I was quite happy that I managed to make you guys confused. Anyway, I think this chapter is going to destroy all of your expectations…You won't understand what I mean until you read the chapter (:**

 ** _Journal Entry Date: 12 May, 2015_**

Either my ex-boyfriends were complete douches or he's a sex-god, I think dryly as I look at myself in the rearview mirror. My face is complete red—lipstick smeared. My clothes are completely out of place, my hair looks like I just got fucked. Don't even get me started on the hickey sitting proudly on my neck. My body is on fire, and I am completely smitten by Takumi Walker.

 _Okay, this is probably not how I should have explained this_ ,

Maybe I should start from the very beginning…

"Excuse me, Miss?" A man dressed in all formals interrupted me, I turned around and faced him, "Yes?" I spoke in a murmur unsure of myself. What does he want with me? Did I do something wrong? I didn't want to mess up on the first week of work. My fears blurred away as he smiled at me, "The CEO wants to see you personally. Please follow me" He spoke as he turned on his heel and started walking.

"M-Me? Are you sure?" I recovered from my shock and followed him as I tried to catch up with his fast yet elegant pace "Maybe you have mistaken me for someone else?"

"I am positive I have not, Miss. I was told to fetch the young lady with long raven black hair and honey-brown eyes wearing a lavender business suit, am I mistaken?" He smiles through his eyes, _Okay, that's definitely me_. I walked hurriedly as fast as my heels could carry me "Well, okay. But what does the CEO want from me?" I blurt out, my old habit. Blurting without thinking. The man stops walking as we reach the elevators, he presses his finger on the touch panel and we wait "I'm afraid I do not know" He says and then there is silence.

"After you, Miss" he says as the doors open. I walk my way inside the lift timidly, and he follows elegantly.

 _This is awkward_ , I sigh as I wait for the elevators to reach the top, which was we were supposed to get off. The middle aged man says nothing, he maintains an impassive face as the elevators go up. I pout, how did I get stuck in here? I hope I'm not in some kind of trouble. OH MY GOD, is he firing me on my first day of work? I sweat and stutter. _No way_. No way. NO FRIGGIN' WAY. Damn it. _I'm freaking out_ , I'M FREAKING OUT. I silently do my breathing exercises and try to calm myself. Well, whatever happens, I will see it through. Come what may.

"Right this way" he says as he opens a glass door, he nods in greeting and the secretary smiles back, who is a guy by the way. What kind of CEO has a male secretary? Is he gay or something? I muse as I am ushered inside.

WOW, I gasp inwardly as I look at the interior his office. The thing that strikes me the most is that there is too much glass in here. The CEO sits with his back facing towards me, he's looking out at the enormous ceiling to floor window, I guess. I look around with my mouth agape, this is so beautiful. His office is huge, with mahogany furniture, and beautiful chandeliers, nothing over the top, but still beautiful in its own way. There is a huge library on the other side of the room, I notice. White plush couches placed on the side with a large glass table in the between. The walls are white, and the windows are huge. The environment is very spacey.

"Uh, Miss?" The guy who escorted me before calls out my name with a fake cough, I look at him, snapping out of my daydreaming. He throws a smile in my direction and walks out "Mr. Walker will now speak with you." he spoke.

"Thank you, Cedric" a voice comes from the other side of the room, and I ignore it. I look at the retreating back, _please don't leave me alone here_! I plead mentally, but my plea is not heard and the doors shut behind me. I sigh as I avert my gaze back where the CEO is sitting.

 _Beautiful_ , my mind and heart exclaim as I look at the man sitting before me. He's looking at me with an amused expressed, yet somehow a very _disappointed_ look on his face. I don't realize I'm staring shamelessly at him. But it's not my fault, really. I'm just a mediocre, average looking girl standing in front of a very, very, VERY good looking man. He's got the most beautiful, wonderful set of eyes I have ever seen—forest green. Blond hair, messy, messy blond hair that look so good on him it's almost a sin. He's wearing a charcoal colored suit that fits him so perfectly, his muscular frame fills in every inch of that fabric, it's almost like the suit is wearing him, not the other way around. He wears a matching tie and a crisp white shirt underneath. My throat goes dry in pure awe. He's like a super model, seriously.

"Have a seat" He says, I noticed he's sitting on the single chair next to the couch. I don't even know when he moved. It's embarrassing. I nod and sit on the couch, very self-consciously. His chin is supported on his knuckle, he's sitting lazily on the seat with one leg over the other, but it looks so elegant and graceful that I'm almost jealous. His legs are long, he's almost more than six feet, I feel like a dwarf (being a proud five six). I look at him and manage a professional smile. He's looking at me, as if waiting for me to be ready for him.

"You wanted to see me" I ask, rather, say. I realize my tone is flat, is that how I should have talked to the CEO? Probably not, stupid girl. I chide myself "Sorry, it's—"

"Yes, I wanted to see you" He says, his tone smooth, and unaffected. I straighten my posture and wait for him to continue.

"May I know your name?" He speaks, softer this time.

"Uh, it's Mia"

"Mia" my name rolls out of his tongue, seductively. This guy literally exudes sex.

I nod timidly "Mia Kirei"

"Kirei?" He raises an eyebrow.

"I'm half Japanese, raised here in England" I blurt out as if I'm having a conversation with a friend.

"I see" He nods, he's almost amused but he doesn't smile.

"What about you?" I blurt out again. What the fuck? I don't know the name of the CEO of my workplace? It's something Walker, right?

"I apologize, Mr. Walker" I say too fast. He chuckles, GOD, HIS CHUCKLE IS SO HOT, my mind screams and I feel like banging my head against his glass wall. Ugh.

"My name" He continues "Is Takumi …Walker" He adds. I feel like he didn't want to say that last name though, it's probably my imagination.

"Okay" I say, embarrassedly. So what do I do now? Is that why he called me here? To ask me my name?

"Wait" I say out loud, he raises his perfectly shaped eyebrow at me again "Your name. Takumi." I blush, almost. "You're Japanese too"

"Half Japanese, yes" He nods.

"Why did you call me?" I ask when my curiosity gets the best of me. His frowny-smile almost vanishes from his face and it is replaced by something; something I couldn't put a finger on. I wait for his answer.

"I'm sorry, I mistook you for someone else, someone I knew" He says, his voice is small, devoid of the previous amusement. His frame almost stiffens, but a smile comes over his features again, but it's different, because it's not real.

"Okay" I mutter as normally as possible.

The silence continues, he has turned his head and is now staring at the window. I feel weird, unwanted. I get up from my seat "So, uhh…it was nice to meet you, Mr. Walker" I say as I bow, my Japanese mannerisms kicking in.

"Likewise, Miss Kirei" He says with another smile as he stands up and walks towards the door.

"Until we meet again" He says as soon as I'm out of his office.

"Yeah, I do work here" I speak, mostly to myself, reminding myself. I smile in his direction and get the fuck out of there. I don't dare to look back at the door, but when I do (when my curiosity gets the best of me), the door is shut with no one in sight.

I walk out and take the stairs, to give myself some time to think. Okay, the CEO called me in, asked me my name, got disappointed, told me he's half Japanese, and spaced out on me. This is certainly weird. But the pieces don't fit properly, He's half Japanese. And a Walker. As far as I knew, the Walker family has been from Britain from the start. Richard Walker was the Duke of Raven Castle, and Takumi Walker replaced him after his death. Maybe Takumi is—what? I don't know, I don't care. I sigh as I reach my floor. It's none of my business anyway.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

My days in the new workplace went by smoothly. I didn't receive strange men coming out to tell me the CEO wants to see me, and I'm not sure if I'm elated or disappointed. I sit on my designated chair in my cabin and picked up a new document. This is the worst part of being a newbie and a fresher, you're given the most boring and shitty work that our superiors are too lazy to do.

I lay my head down on the stupid document sitting on the table and pout, as if I'm complaining to the desk. Sometimes I think that I'm too silly to be twenty one.

"Mia?"

My name is voiced out and I immediately sit up straight. It's Aaron. My superior. And my manager. I coped to be friendly with him. I stick out my hand and he walks towards me.

"Can you take these to the conference hall, sorry" He says as he puts a small pile of documents on my desk. I get up and take the document "Roger that"

"Thanks" he says with a smile.

"No prob, which floor?" I ask as I pick the pile up.

"Third from our floor" He says apologetically.

"Okay" I show him a thumbs up and head out.

This building is fucking huge.

Seriously.

I reach to the third floor with ease, while carefully walking with the stack of papers in my hands. The conference hall is in view now, which is crowded right now. I see many people fussing around here and there. I wonder what they're fussing about. These people know no chill.

Walking towards the conference hall, I look around. I see many foreign faces, different executives. I don't even know if they work here or if they're from some other corporation, I still get lost in these floors. I look around for familiar faces and hope to see the CEO. Okay, not really my fault here. He's attractive, very attractive. It's hard to just look away from that kind of face, and not hope to see it again. Our short meeting has been on my mind for a longer time than it should. I might even have a very small crush on him.

Crush?

 _Crash!_

I slip on my heels while looking around, and fall stupidly, on to the tiled floor. These people really shouldn't keep the floors too shiny and slippery. I scowl as I rub my arm and start collecting the papers that are now scattered on the floor.

"Are you okay?" A familiar voice asks. I'm too busy picking up the papers to look up at the owner of the face.

"Yes" I hiss and collect the papers, I'm deeply embarrassed. Everyone must be looking at me and laughing right now. But I hear no sound. I look up in confusion.

I meet vibrant forest green eyes, he looks at me questionably as he picks up my papers like a normal person. He's wearing a navy blue jacket over a light shaded crisp shirt. My heart is in my mouth as I look at him so closely, his blond hair are as wild and free as ever. I follow my line of sight and stare shamelessly at his long and slender fingers that are holding the papers. I dare to look at his face while he's picking up the papers. Perfect jawline. His features are very sharp and manage to stand out, always. Ugh. His arm muscles are well defined and again, his clothes fit him a bit too perfectly for any human being. His lips are closed in a thin line. I finish picking up my papers, he gets up too, and hands me the rest of the papers. I get up, somehow, on my own. I was expecting him to be chivalrous enough to extend a hand, but I was wrong. He stares at me, along with a group of executives he was supposedly conversing with before I bumped into him. I stand up straight and hold the pile properly. He completely disregards me and walks away with those suited up men.

Jerk.

Asshole!

I huff and puff mentally as I think about my encounter with Takumi Walker. What's with him? He could have at least acted as if he had met me before. How arrogant. I remember the disapproving look in his eyes before he turned on his heel and walked away. I imagined this encounter to be like a cliché movie scene, except for the part that it's not a romantic movie and the guy is a jerk. I sighed, I made a huge fool out of myself while daydreaming about him, and he didn't even give me a second look. This leaves me more annoyed and dejected than it should have.

My third encounter with Takumi Walker happened to be in an arts and literature museum. There was a big exhibition about Romantic Tragedies and well, I had to go! I'm a huge reader and a sucker for literature and poetry. I wore my hair into a bun with a teal colored dress that reached my knees. I saw him standing in front of a painting, with a glass of wine in hand. There was something different about the way he looked at the painting, it was almost as if he was looking through it. Looking at the soul of the person who made that painting, or maybe I am just too poetic. As always, his hair were a wonderful mess, his black shirt and grey blazer making him look as sinful as ever. Muscular frame, nonchalant face, straight posture, long legs, and I could go on forever describing his features, but I remembered how much of a jerk he is. Ugh, spoiled rich brat. I looked away, back into the book I was checking, it was a tragedy. Two lovers—separated by fate. It was written by a French author and then translated.

I get lost in the summary of the book, and the song summertime sadness is being played in the background. I decide to buy a copy and look up, to find the cash counter. I am standing in the small stall that is selling books—old classics, literature, poetry, all those beautiful things. My eyes find Takumi Walker again, he is standing a few feet away from me. Why does this man stand out a bit too much? Suddenly, he looks in my direction. Our gazes lock, and I freeze. I was caught ogling that jerk face. His lips curl up in a smirk which is too harmful for my heart. I look away and pretend to bury my face in a random book I picked up.

"Fifty Shades of Grey?" he's amused by my book choice. I look up, he's standing next to me, wine glass in hand, smirk plastered on his face. I am flabbergasted. I put down the damn wretched book, I thought they only sold classics here?

"It's very educational" I lie smoothly, as smooth as I can manage. My inner self is laughing at me, and so is he, internally, I can bet.

He raises an eyebrow and places the wine glass on the tray which a waiter is holding "Educational?" the word rolls out of his tongue as if he's thinking about something, his features crease into a thoughtful expression and I gape at him. _Damn it_.

"You should read it too" I blurt out, trying to be savage. _What the hell?_ I officially hate myself.

His lips are curled up into another smirk, a chuckle escapes his face and the people around us appear to melt, why does he always ooze of sex? "I prefer practical learning" his voice is a whisper, alluring and seductive, it reaches my ears and I turn red.

"Why don't you find someone to teach you then?" I say, at this point, my brain has gone haywire, I don't even know what I am saying anymore.

Another chuckle, he runs a hand through his hair as I shudder inwardly, _damnit!_ "I'm more of the type that teaches others" his lips almost touch my ear, almost. I step back, he's overwhelming.

"W-Well, find a student then" I say as I stomp my way out, he reaches out for my wrist. _Oh my god, he just touched me!_ He holds out a card and places it in my hand "Contact me if you need private lessons" he walks away with an entertained expression on his face. Did I just have a double meaning conversation with my boss? Yes I did. I hold the crème business card in my hand. The words Takumi Walker are written in silver. I touch my wrist unconsciously as I turn the card, his private number is written on the back. I stare at his muscular back and broad shoulders; his butler, Cedric, joins him with a shopping bag that supposedly contains purchased articles. I saw a few more set of eyes, women, gawking at him as he walks out of the store. I know I'm not the only one.

I lie in my bed, staring at the crème card in my hands. I'm so tempted to call him right now, but I do not want to come out too interested, or desperate. I bite my lip as I save his contact in my phone. I save him as Mr. Walker, I don't want to be personal with him. I should probably maintain my distance from this guy. Who knows? He might already have a girlfriend and might be looking for only 'fun' with me. Don't get me wrong, I'm all about dating and having flings, but cheating is just wrong.

 _He leaves me confused_.

I draw out this conclusion as I stare at my ceiling, which has twinkling neon silver stars stuck on it (I did that while redecorating so that I could have my own night view from my bedroom). I feel that I'm indulging in this guy way more than I should. I'm not usually this attracted to a guy. If I have feelings for someone, I act on them. Yet, I can't decide when it comes to this jerk. What should I do? I have to relive myself from his thoughts.

I sit up straight as I pick up my phone and open his contact. One text wouldn't hurt right? At least it would relieve me of my wretched thoughts. I don't want to waste my time thinking about what ifs. I open my messenger app and tap on his name.

What do I write? I am clueless. I don't wanna come off too strong. I don't want him to think of me as a source of entertainment, but I don't want him to think I'm too into him either. I'm just curious. Yep, I'm just curious. I wanna know more about this mystery guy, that's all.

After much thinking I settle on this and send him a text.

 _I never thought you were the kind who liked literature and poetry –Mia._

I close my eyes and hit send. I almost laugh at what I sent, this was the extent of my brain's capability? I bury my face in my pillow and spend my time denying that I'm waiting for his reply.

His reply came late at night, around 11:47pm, I was so close to dozing off but my sleep vanished at the beep of my phone. I immediately grabbed my phone and scowled.

 _I'm a lot of things that you cannot even begin to fathom, Kirei. –T_

I glare at my phone screen. What kind of abstruse reply was that? Is he pissed off or something? I blush at the mention of my real name, Kirei. My family is originally Japanese, but I was raised in England since my parents worked here, so I had changed my first name from Kirei to Mia since Kirei sounds weird, and people can't pronounce it properly. Through my not so vast knowledge of Japanese, I found that my name means beautiful. It's embarrassing to have such a boasting name when I'm not even that pretty. Ugh, I'm rambling again. I reply to his text with a pout.

 _Then show me. –Mia_

HA! I managed to be just as ambiguous as him. I smirk inwardly as I pop a strawberry flavored candy in my mouth which, by the way, tastes delicious.

 _I'd rather see you ;) –T_

Wow, he's flirting back. He text-winked at me! Apparently, it's a thing.

 _So eager, Mr. Walker –Mia_

 _Not so bad yourself, Kirei –T_

 _Uh, Thanks? –Mia_

I don't know what to say. How does this guy manage to shut me off with one liners? He's got good verbal skills, ugh.

 _Wine or coffee? –T_

Is this some weird way of asking me out? My fingers shake in excitement. I facepalm, what is wrong with me?

 _Both –Mia_

 _Perfect, I'll pick you up at 5 tomorrow—T_

What the fuck? What kind of guy asks a girl out like that? I glare at him through my phone, asshole!

 _I didn't even say yes –Mia_

 _I_ _didn't even ask you, I told you. –T_

 _Are you always this stubborn? What if I say no? –Mia_

He's such an infuriating jerk. Who does that? WHO DOES THAT?!

 _Oh? –T_

 _What? –Mia_

I scowl, glare, and sneer. What kind of jerk is he? The reply doesn't instantly come like the others, after a good two minutes, my phone buzzes.

 _Flat number 25, Seventh Avenue, Onyx apartments. Should I come to fetch you unannounced or should I knock and ask your roommate first? –T_

What the fuck. That guy tracked me down. He even knows I have a flat mate. What kind of weird sorcery did he try? Apparently being a CEO gives people powers.

 _Impressive, Mr. Walker. –Mia_

I am flabbergasted, I really shouldn't underestimate this guy.

 _Shouldn't a good girl like you be sleeping at such an hour? –T_

 _Shouldn't a good boy like you be sleeping at such an hour? –Mia_

 _I can assure you, I. am. Not. A. boy. And who said I was the good one? –T_

 _Then what are you, if not a boy? –Mia_

 _I am a man, Kirei. A full-fledged, hot blooded man. –T_

I know that.

All of my innocent thoughts and conversations are thrown out of the window at his remark. Why does he say such misleading things? I choke on my candy and saliva, I sit up coughing and go to the living room.

"What's wrong? Mia?" my flat mate turns her head and looks at me worriedly, Catherine works in Walker Corp too. Her boyfriend, Nathan is sitting on the couch. I wave at them awkwardly as I down some water. Catherine has brown hair and hazel eyes, (bangs like mine), but her forehead isn't hidden because of her bangs like mine, she pushes them towards the side. Nick is tall with black hair. His eyes shine like that of a cat. They're a cute couple.

"Hey guys. I'm fine" I manage with a weak smile after my cough fit is over, I go back to my room, not wanting to disturb them any further and pray that they don't have sex on the couch like the last time and completely destroy my sleep.

 _Okay –Mia_

What am I supposed to say after that? Yes you're a man, a very hot and charming one, but a jerk too?

 _Sleep, Mia –T_

 _Likewise –Mia_

What is with his annoying attitude? Always commanding and ordering around, he should probably leave this habit back in his office. You know, for his own good.

 _A very good night to you, Miss Kirei –T_

The formal façade is back and I can't help but scowl.

 _Good night, Mr. Walker –Mia_

I switch off my phone and shut my eyes.

 _Infuriating, good looking jerk!_

 **A.N: Hah, each one of you thought that it was Misaki! I guess you all hate me now, oh well, don't worry, Misaki** ** _is_** **going to be in the fic in the later chapters. And did you like Mia?! It seems as though she has an extreme resemblance to Misaki, (only in appearance though, Mia is not a tsundere). This story will be updated according to the response I receive for this fic.**


	3. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2:**

 **God, you guys really hate Mia, don't you? Hah, well that was what I was expecting. I guess you won't hate her as much if you stay patient for the first few chapters. I know you're mad that Misaki's not in the story** _yet_ **but sometimes its fun to try out new things. Change can be good. I assure you, Misaki will show up later on (I did say it was going to be a Taku x Misa fic, but not right away). Once the plot will not be a blur, you'll enjoy it. Promise. It's just that this is not a fairy tale kind of story. It's realistic. It's about what actually people go through every day of their lives. Don't hate Mia guys, give her a chance. I love y'all. (I PROMISE IT WILL NOT BE A DISASTER)**

 **POV MIA KIREI**

My life, is not a novel. I've been an average person all my life. I had good grades throughout my life, nothing too good like the first position, neither too bad. I never flunked a class, never did drugs or smoked pot. I dated in high school. I wasn't the most popular girl in college, but I wasn't invisible either. My friend circle consisted of average people like me, guys and girls. Nothing was extra ordinary.

Blind dating, casual sex, serious relationships, I've done it all. I've gotten drunk and stayed sober too. I have sneaked out of classes, hung out with my friends, done lots of sleepovers and pillow fights. I have neither been a prodigy, nor a loser. There's nothing much to tell, nothing special in my life. I am mediocre. But, the me of this time didn't know what was going to happen next in my life. My adult phase awaited me with so many surprises. And I can confidently say that the arrival of Takumi Walker in my life started the rollercoaster ride that consisted of happiest, saddest, and the most heartbreaking moments of my life. Nevertheless, they are precious memories that I still cherish to this day. As I look back at those times now, I am truly thankful to the gods and the heavens that I met Takumi Walker.

 _\- - - - - - x - - - - - - -_

 ** _Journal Entry Date: 31st May, 2015_**

Takumi pulls out a chair for me and I sit down, his face is devoid of any emotion as he sits down opposite to me. I sneak a look in his direction while he's busy ordering for the two of us. _He's such a gentleman sometimes_ , I think.

"So, why am I here?" I blurt out, I find my tongue misbehaving around him. A lot.

His lips quirk up into a smirk, not a smile. "You're interesting" he regards me, is it a compliment? I don't know.

"Okay?" I say, unsure. I'm so nervous. I clutch the hem of my skirt anxiously—unconsciously.

"So" he continues "Kirei, how long have you been working in Walker?"

"I'm new here, our first meeting" I look away "was my first week at Walker."

"I see." His face is impassive as he gets lost in his thoughts for a while. I feel awkward. Out of place. In this huge luxurious café on the outskirts of London. It's really beautiful.

"So" I clear my throat awkwardly "Do you like your work?" _Stupid, Stupid question_!

He raises an eyebrow at me appreciatively, what the hell?

"What makes you think I don't?" Another smirk.

"Well, you never smile!" I retort.

"I do." another smirk. This conversation is leading nowhere. I inwardly squirm and glare at him at the same time. Why is he so uptight?

"You don't." I say thoughtfully—thinking back to the times I've seen him at work, in meetings, in interviews. He never smiles.

His features turn into a frown for a slightest moment and I feel like he displayed something he didn't want to show, immediately so—he chuckles. "So, Kirei, tell me about yourself? Enough about me." he says as the waiter comes and places our coffee mugs on the table, followed by cupcakes.

"My name is Mia" I emphasize on my name as I sip my coffee, which tastes heavenly by the way, I don't like my Japanese name!

"Yes, Kirei." He nods. Annoying jerk!

"Well, I've completed my education in London, I've got a master's degree in business administration." I pause, "Is this a job interview?" I gape at him.

He laughs, "I can assure you it's not. I'm merely trying to be friends with you." He leans forward, touching a strand of my black hair "Kirei" he murmurs as he sits back. My heart is in my mouth, and butterflies have invaded my entire being.

"Mia, my name is Mia…" I say again, as I try to calm my racing heart. He's looking at me with an amused expression on his face. Damn it. It's almost as if he was testing if he has some kind of effect on me.

And he does.

And now he _knows_ it.

I look away as I pretend to be looking at my wrist watch, I look up again, feeling more relaxed now "My parents are Japanese, I've been raised here in England." I say with a calm face as I take another sip.

"So, have you ever been to Japan?" He asks next as he rests his chin under the back of his palm as he places his mug on the table.

"I haven't, have you?" I inquire, I can't seem to get out any information from him.

"I have" he murmurs lowly.

"How is it?"

"You'll like Japan." he declares, and I raise an eyebrow. Okay, Mr. Astrologer.

"What about you? Who are you, Mr. Walker?" I ask as I look out of the window next to me, the view is spectacular.

"I'm a lot of things, Kirei." he says, I feel darkness in his words, then he changes his line of thought and speaks "I was born in England, Half Japanese like you, I attended college in London as well, and joined Walker shortly afterwards. And here I am." he stopped talking with a sigh, and looked out of the window like I was some time ago. The sound of rain drops falling makes me turn my gaze away from his face and look out of the window as well. Tranquil washes over with the incoming of rain and the smell of rain invades my senses.

"It's raining" I say, stating the obvious, he nods "I guess it is."

"Do you like rain?" I ask, rather—blurt.

"I do, it makes me feel free" he says as he looks out.

I find myself pushing my chair back and I stand up, I grab his wrist and pull him, making him stand up. I drag him outside of the café and he's clearly amused, but says nothing. We're greeted with raindrops and I find myself smiling as I look at him. I grin as we stand in the middle of an empty road—surrounded by nothing but trees. The café sits in its location, just across the road. He runs a hand through his now wet hair and his lips quirk up into a small smile. He looks up at the sky and closes his eyes, raindrops fall on his face and his shirt and blazer are drenched, just like my clothes. I smile as I look at him "Do you feel free now?"

He looks into my eyes and my butterflies are back, I close my eyes—because he's too tall for me and I have to look up, which causes raindrops to go into my eyes. He picks up another strand of my wet hair that is stuck to my face and pushes it back. I look at him with a blush. I was hoping he would just kiss me now.

But he doesn't.

Nor does he reply to my question.

"Let's get you inside, you're going to catch a cold." he speaks with a firm voice as he gives me his dark colored blazer and places it on my shoulders. My clothes are drenched and it does feel nice to have something over me, but I wished we stayed in the rain longer. I have always loved the rain.

We walk towards the café without a word. He instructs the waiters to fetch us towels.

"Certainly, Mr. Walker. Please follow me" the waiter speaks and we walk. He leaves us in an empty restroom. I'm given towels and I see Takumi running a hand through his hair. His white crisp shirt is stuck to his lean muscular abdomen and I can see his muscles through the transparent shirt. I blush red and look away as I dry my hair.

After thirty minutes of rain, it stops. We're dried up and ready to leave. I bite my lip as he opens the door of his car for me. I get inside as normally as I can.

"I'm sorry if you're mad at me for getting you wet in the rain." I speak while he drives. His eyes are on the road as he drives with ease, one hand on the steering wheel, other on the gear stick. He smirks as he looks at me "But I enjoyed getting wet with you". I gape like a fish at his sexual innuendo, and glare at him "You're so cocky!"

"And you're so wet." He grins amusedly. I huff and puff, looking for a snarky comeback but I have none. "I am not."

"Should I check?" he looks at me, completely disregarding the road in front of him, his eyes are a dark combination of green and charcoal, smoldering. And I'm enraptured. How can he be so perverted, gentle, dangerous, and funny at the same time? It's a crime!

"N-No!" I glare at him "Look ahead!"

"Sure" his gaze turns away and he looks at the road in front. My heart beat is so erratic, and my cheeks are red. He's so devious!

"Thank you for the wonderful time, Miss Kirei" he speaks as he drops me to my apartment. I blush "I enjoyed a lot" I say.

"I'm glad I could be enjoyable" he says as he kisses my hand. I freeze, he's looking into my eyes. Again, I wait for a kiss which never comes.

"I shall take my leave now" he says as he steps back to leave.

"Okay, Mr. Walker" I say as I rub my hand unconsciously. He kissed my hand!

"It's Takumi. My name." he says with a small curl of lips and I think he smiled, but I don't know, since he's turned away to leave.

I walk inside my apartment and shut the door behind me. My heart is beating so fast and I lean on the door and slide down with a sigh.

I open my eyes sometime later and I see Cath snickering at me, she's sitting next to me with two beer bottles in hand. She crawls towards me and sits next to me, leaning against the door with a beer in hand.

"So, who is he?" she says as she drinks her beer. I sigh, I know it's no use hiding stuff from her, I pick up my beer bottle and drink some before I began.

 ** _And two hours later…_**

"Oh my god. You went out with our boss!" Cath spoke with her mouth filled with French fries. We're on to the fifth beer now and she's being drunk and obnoxious.

"I did not go out with him. I merely had a coffee with him. That's it"

"Yeah right" She snorts in my face, and I gape at her. Just when I thought she would just stop, she didn't. "I don't see our boss taking girls out like that. I've worked in Walker for a year now. The guy barely smiles or acknowledges anyone."

"I know right! That's what I told him. He never frickin' smiles!" I blurt again, and then look away. The look she's giving me is too embarrassing for me.

"Wow, your habit of blurting stuff isn't out yet. Better be careful around the hottie!" she whistled.

"Don't call him a hottie. It's weird" I laugh as I pick up fries to stuff my face, just like her.

"But he is hot!"

"I'm gonna have to agree with you on that" we laugh.

 _Now that we've covered the coffee part, the wine remains.—Mia_

 _As sharp as ever, Miss Kirei.–T_

 _Yeah—Mia_

I seriously cannot keep us with this man's mood swings. One moment he is playful, and fun. The other moment he completely shuts me off. What the hell?

 _Free your schedule tomorrow evening. Let's hope you don't get wet this time. Goodnight. (: -T_

See? This is what I'm talking about. He really needs a mood regulator, if such a thing exists. Infuriating jerk, always talking in double meaning sentences. I feel like either killing him or burying myself alive.

 _Don't get your panties in a twist thinking about mine –Mia_

Oh My God. Did I just…I don't even want to think about what I just typed. What will he think of me now?

But then, I shouldn't care, did he care about what I thought about him? HA! In your face, Walker.

 _We shall see about that tomorrow. Miss Kirei. –T_

 _I'm not scared of you—Mia_

 _And you shouldn't be either (: -T_

Ugh.

 _Good night. –Mia_

 _And to you as well –T_

 _\- - - - - - x - - - - - - -_

My heart hammers in my chest as I grip my skirt anxiously, while standing in front of a bar. Seriously, why am I so nervous? I'm just meeting some guy. Then why?

Oh, right. I'll will answer this question myself. I'm absolutely freaked out because I wasn't able to get his words out of my mind. " _We shall see about that tomorrow_ " means what? Huh? Why are you so confusing, Takumi? I do want to ask him, but I know that I won't get a straight answer.

"Ready?" he asks, for a moment there I even forgot that Takumi was next to me all this time. IF only the jerk knew what all was going inside my head. This makes me giggle a little. He doesn't even know the acronyms I use for him.

"Yeah" I mumble and we walk inside. The bar isn't as crowded as I imagined it to be. Maybe because it isn't 8pm yet. The place is elegant and clean, unlike other bars I've visited. At least he has a good taste, I scoff.

The waiters lead us inside a table for two in a secluded area. Turns out this bar is somewhat like a classy restaurant. Takumi pulls a chair for me and I sit while mumbling a small thanks. He gives me a small chuckle and I bite my lip. If only he knew how much I like his chuckle. God, kill me now.

"So, what have you been up to?" I ask him in a friendly manner. The atmosphere was beginning to get awkward and my cheeks mere heating up for no apparent reason.

"The usual" he says as he scans through the menu. My eyes look in his direction while he's busy scanning through the items. He's really a miracle in this wretched world. Like rain in a desert. Sunshine in the snow. I look away, it's just like he had said; that he is a lot of things: cold, infuriating, funny, charming, enigmatic, gorgeous, lovable because even though he drives me insane without even knowing it, but still I can't bring myself to hate him…and then, he's also one another thing. He's unattainable.

"What is your definition of usual?" I smile as he hands me the menu, yes he's unattainable. A guy like him would never even look in the direction of a girl like me. I'm everything that he's not.

"Well…business meetings, board meetings, meals with executives, interventions, seminars, the usual" he regards me with a small smile that didn't reach his eyes. Oh how I'd kill for a true smile from him.

We chat about normal things and I can't help but wonder if something is wrong with him. Because to me, it looks like he has gone through more things than he lets on. I feel like there's something missing…but I do not know what it is. If only he would leave everything aside and tell me…then I'd do anything in my power to give him that if it means that I'd get to see a real smile on his face.

Or maybe I'm reading too much into things. Maybe I should just stop thinking all this…

"Are you okay?" He asks with a raised eyebrow. I choke on what I was eating and start coughing. I quickly pick up a glass sitting on the table, and end up coughing more since it was wine. Fuck my life. Really.

"Be careful" Takumi speaks, I just realized that he had stood up from his place and was currently patting my back. I blush crimson red and end up coughing more.

"Here's water" he brings the glass close to my lips and makes me drink. Why is he such a compassionate being?

"Thank you" I manage to speak as I clear my throat. I feel fine after drinking the water. I can't help but feel how much of a train wreck I am.

Takumi goes back to sitting in his seat and we continue eating in silence.

"I thought you'd have said like at least twenty sexual innuendos by now" I say with a laugh.

He raises an eyebrow, eyes shining with mischief, "How can I? When you're the pervert?"

"Uh, excuse me? You're the pervert here! You're the one who went all 'I prefer practical learning' on me the other day!"

"But you were the one who was reading 50 shades of grey" he replies with a smirk.

"It was a mistake!"

"And who was talking about panties?" he says defiantly, when we get up to leave, arms crossed, he grins challengingly.

I puff my cheeks, "Yeah? Who was talking about getting wet? As if you could do that to me! I'm not even attracted to you" I say with pride. I'm such a good liar.

"Really now?" he stops walking altogether and looks at me with an evil smirk. I gulp and pretend a little more "Well, yeah! What else did you expect? It's not like I—what the?!" I stop rambling as he grabs my arms and pulls me into another corridor. Before I could ask him further—

He pushes me against the wall, and presses his body on to mine. I look at him with hazy eyes, he holds my chin and kisses me fully on the lips. I shudder as the kiss ignites something in me. _I want more_ , I eagerly run my hand through his hair, something I have wanted to do for ages. He looks at me with a devious smirk as he grabs both of my hands and holds them behind me, my flushed cheek is rubbed against the cold wall as he turns me around. He holds my hair and pushes them forward, and kisses me at the center of my spine, my nerves are on fire with his kisses, and I squirm under his hold. His hand wraps itself around my waist and the other disappears.

"And you said that you're not attracted to me" he muses and I barely come to register what he just said. My brain has gone haywire.

I am turned around again as our gazes lock again. _This is totally crazy and fucking maddening_ , I think. He kisses me again, holding my hands over my head so that I can't try any _funny business_. God, I have never been kissed this way before. He takes his sweet time as he holds my chin in place with one hand, other busy with my wrists. He bites my lower lip when I try to kiss him back. He smiles deviously at me, almost pitying me, as he kisses me fully on the lips again. A moan escapes my mouth before I form any coherent thought, his hand is inside my shirt, tracing the underside of my breast. I can't remember how and when he snaked his hand inside my shirt, all I can think of is how _good_ this feels. My knees turn to jelly as he kisses my neck, his skilled fingers teasing my soft, sensitive skin as he continues his torture. He hasn't touched my breasts yet, but I'm too dazed to care. He has completely dominated me. He pities me, and lets go of my hands, that are positively red by now. I pant for air as he steps back and looks at me as a painter does, when he finishes a masterpiece.

He awards me with a pleased grin on his face, and I look away. My heart hammers in my chest as I think about what the fuck just happened. This man, devil, completely subjugated me. I look at him, I want to wipe that stupid victorious grin off his face. I walk towards him with full intentions of making him lose. I grab a fistful of his shirt and pull him down, _he's too tall for me damn it_! He raises an amused eyebrow, and looks down at me. I take advantage of the situation and kiss him on the lips, a chuckle escapes from him as we kiss, and I look at him with a pout, "Really?" He's amused. Before I retort he picks me up like I am a feather and holds me against the wall, he lets go of me and holds me by my shoulder. His right leg parts both of my legs as he kisses my neck—hard.

I am breathless as I am attacked by his kisses—once again. But this time, it's worse, or the better. His leg parts my legs in such a way that I can't help but shiver in a pleasant way. The rough fabric of his jeans rubs against my thigh—my skirt is hiked up because of whatever is happening. "I thought you said I couldn't?" My skin tingles at the contact and I realize how close he is to my—well, I refuse to think it out loud. He lets go of my neck and I'm almost relived, but then, he kisses me once more. I kiss him back, with my hands in his shirt, I may even have torn the buttons off his shirt from the sheer intensity of my hold, but I couldn't care less at the moment.

"You're not wet—but drenched." He mumbles in my ear and moves away when breathing becomes hard, turns out he's breathless too, but not as much as me. He folds his arms in pride and male ego as he looks at me with a devious grin. Again, I am his masterpiece. I look at him with a flustered face and close my knees shut in frustration, damn it. "Come, I'll drop you home" he murmurs as he walks towards his beautiful and expensive car. I walk slowly behind him, my legs are still wobbly and my soul is still shaken.

I really have to admit it now: either my ex-boyfriends were complete douches or he's a sex-god, I think dryly as I look at myself in the rearview mirror. My face is complete red—lipstick smeared. My clothes are completely out of place, my hair looks like I just got fucked. Don't even get me started on the hickey sitting proudly on my neck. My body is on fire, and I—Mia Kirei am completely smitten by Takumi Walker.

 **POV- USUI TAKUMI WALKER**

 ** _12th of May, 2015_**

 _Misaki_

My heart races as soon as I spot a familiar set of raven hair. My throat dries up as I look down from the railing at the endless number of people in the main reception of Walker Corporation, the place which I run. The girl is wearing a lavender business suit, she is tall, slender. Just like my Misaki. I am unable to have a good look of her face though, since I am neither wearing my glasses, nor my contacts. I completely disregard the executives that are standing next to me, hanging on to every word I say. My eyes search for someone—anyone, that can help me with this. I spot Cedric and call him with a flick of my fingers. I excuse myself from the people surrounding me, and walk towards Cedric.

"Master?"

"Fetch me the lady on the first floor. Black hair, Lavender suit" I say and walk away. Cedric says nothing, he merely bows and leaves. I cancel everything on my schedule. I want to see that girl right now. I am impatient, as I pace in my office. I sit down dejectedly in my seat and look out at the city view from the glass.

 _This can't be Misaki, be rational. Be reasonable_ , my mind says. My fucked up heart laughs in my face, _don't hope for unattainable things, it's must be another one of those girls that have same hair and eyes as Misaki, and you always end up trying to woo them, and leave them all in the end_.

I sneer at my stupidity, but am saved by my inner demons as Cedric opens the door. A girl walks inside, I can see her clearly now, since I have my contacts on. She's awfully shy and timid. A smile comes on my face as Cedric leaves. I walk around the office and sit on a chair next to the couch.

She's got the same raven black hair, same amber eyes, same height, and the same frame as Misaki, except for front bangs that cover her forehead. Anyway, the resemblance is uncanny. I ease her up and she looks more comfortable now. I ask her name, out of politeness. It's Mia Kirei. Half-Japanese, I feel like high fiving with her, but that would be inappropriate. I don't do friendly.

 _Misaki_

She asks me why I called her, I am amused by her guts. She looks at me and starts apologizing for her bluntness, but I'm far in deep thought to care. Her question is stuck in my mind, why did I call her here? Why indeed? I am answer-less.

Misaki's face painfully comes to mind and I speak, as if my tongue has a mind of its own. I tell her she resembled somebody I used to know. I left out irrelevant parts—like how I am hopelessly in love with that girl even after five years that I left her. I left out the part where I was forced to leave Misaki, by my own wretched family. I leave out the part where I spend each and every day thinking about Misaki, and restraining myself from trying to find her. I left out the part in which I hopelessly drag myself through each day, trying to forget her, and replace her, and failing to do so. I also didn't mention the part where I am helpless—I cannot go back to her anymore, she must have moved on with her life. She must be happy, and I don't want to disrupt her world. I also left out the part where I mention how I am too trying to move on with my life, but it seems like I will forever be stuck on the same name—Misaki Ayuzawa. The name which this girl doesn't have. I am snapped out as I heard her mumble something, I get up in respect and show her out. I run a hand through my hair.

 _Misaki Ayuzawa._

 _\- - - - - - x - - - - - - -_

 **What's your guess about Takumi and his character? Tell me about it in the review section. And how would you justify the statement, "Mia is too bright of a sun to shine in Takumi Walker's dark world"?**


	4. Chapter 3

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 **BEFORE YOU COMMENCE TOWARDS THE NEXT CHAPTER**

I apologize for the following long Author's note, this has got to be the most controversial fan-fiction that I've begun to write, and I realized that it's impossible to continue writing before I present a clarification before my readers.

If you have any doubts, or if you reviewed on the previous chapter or personally messaged me regarding this particular story, you should consider giving this a quick read.

 **Why controversial?**

Because everyone has their different opinions about the supposed plot of the story, the readers were getting frustrated because they couldn't point out the actual plot of the story, since this isn't a usual predictable story. Everyone was going crazy and I apologize for doing that to you. Hahah…

 **Who is Mia Kirei? Is it a self-insert? Did you write a fantasy fiction in which you starred yourself against Takumi Walker? Is this a fetish? Or are you just a dreamy hormonal girl who keeps imagining herself with Takumi and wrote this?**

The answer is No.

This isn't a self-insert. The creation of Mia Kirei was purely coincidental. My actual name isn't Mia, or Kirei for that matter. I wanted a different name for my character. Something half-English and half-Japanese, since Mia's parents are Japanese. Mia had a nice ring to it that's why I put it, and Kirei was added because something like "Mia Takashi" or "Mia Nakamura" or "Mia fuji" or "Mia Suzuki" or "Mia Uzuhara" didn't sound good to my ears. It was a mere whim on the basis of which I named her Mia Kirei.

 **What is the concept behind Mia Kirei? Is she more than a look-alike of Misaki Ayuzawa? Are they twins? Are they related? Is Mia Kirei actually Misaki Ayuzawa in disguise?**

Mia Kirei is a normal, usual girl. By Mia, I wanted to put forward the story of that 'just another girl', in a story, the hero and heroine always end up together, but what about the ones that sacrifice their love and happiness? The ones that give up on the hero or the heroine so that they can end up together? What about the girl that never gets love? What about the unwanted girl?

Mia had amber eyes, raven front bangs, she's Japanese, she's sweet and innocent, no matter what, and she isn't Misaki. Misaki is a strong willed, independent woman, a tsundere. Misaki will go to deep lengths to hide her embarrassment, and Mia would openly propose to a guy if she likes him. But there's a similarity between the two—they both are diligent and stand up for what they believe in. And this is why Takumi is reminded of Misaki when he saw Mia in his office.

 **Is this a TakumixOC?**

Mia and Takumi will never have an actual, genuine, serious, proper relationship throughout the length of the story, I think.

 **Will Misaki show up in the story sooner or later? Will Takumi and Misaki end up together for good? Or will Takumi just keep on looking for her look alikes and satisfying himself with the closest thing he can get to Misaki?**

Yes, Misaki will show up. Will they end up together? If I answer this right away, there will be no fun in writing the story.

 **Will you continue writing this story and publishing the story here?**

Yes, I will finish this story. Will I update the chapters here? Not if I get a very bad response.

 **What is the plot of this story? Did anyone in the reviews manage to get it right?**

Yes, I found this one review that hit the nail on the spot, following is the actual idea behind this fic given by a fellow Author:

Lady Stradivari _: "I admit I was rather shocked when I first read the first two chapters. Assuming it was a self-insert, it somewhat deterred me from reading this, but I felt as if there was more to this story, so I decided to wait it out a bit, and make my inferences once there was an ample amount of details for me to presume anything. (Correct me if I am wrong about the self-insert concept.) The third chapter cleared things up, especially as to Takumi's reasons for pursuing Mia._ __

 _My opinion of Takumi in this story... hmm. I understand where he is coming from, but his manner of coping with his problems will prove to be destructive to both him and Mia in the future. It seems that he is aware of this cycle, holds no sense of remorse from breaking the hearts of the women he had previously dated (for the mere reason that they resembled this one girl that he could never forget, even if he had made the conscious decision to leave her, regardless of his family's coercion. Unless you say otherwise, his family never put a gun on his head, so ultimately, he had made that choice to leave her. He could make up any excuse for that and blame his family for separating them, but in the end, he was the one who had chosen that option.), and does nothing to address this problem of his. But I do understand the feeling of being hopelessly in love with someone for years, and how pathetic it feels to still bear feelings for that person, when it has been so long that you would have expected both parties to move on and live their own separate lives. But even with that, it feels as if you are still there, standing, waiting for something to happen. Anyhow, I see him as trash here, yet Mia worships the ground he walks upon (but only because she does not know him very well, and the entire relationship is rushed and more of a tease rather than an actual relationship.) However, this is the first time I have read a story where Takumi is portrayed with such complexity, so kudos for that. Before agreeing to your statement, I have to get to know Mia more in this story though._ __

 _I commend you for being innovative by doing a self-insert in your story. Although admittedly, it had almost held me back from reading this, I believe that with the right person, a great story can emerge from it. I recall reading a self-insert story in the Naruto archive that I absolutely enjoyed, and it was what made me stay and wait for your story to unravel before I could pass on a judgment. Setting aside this factor, I believe that you have penned a remarkable story here. Pray that you continue this. I do find it quite realistic, and something that I could relate with. I hope that your readers would see past the self-insert and comprehend the depth of Takumi's lingering feelings for Misaki and the growing attraction of Mia towards Takumi that could lead to devastating consequences. I will be looking forward to it._ __

 _Thank you for sharing this story of yours. Will wait patiently for your updates._ __

 _\- LS"_

 _\- - - - - - x - - - - - - -_

 ** _I literally love the people who have supported me on the story, I love you guys. Seriously._**

 ** _Special thanks: Amber83, mikanlove, Naz123, ArrogantIgnorant045, Takumisa17,Putiaryx, Ishita.d, Minniemiss123, Lady Stradivari, Ryo Kensai, Skye, iloveanime1322,_** ** _1993_**

 ** _Oh and the guests who reviewed calling this fanfiction names and telling me that they came for a Takumi x Misaki fic not this 'shit', I suggest you read the summary of the story first. There is no Misaki mentioned in the characters of the fic until she makes an appearance. Hiding behind a guest label is only the epitome of cowardice. I don't intend to bad mouth anyone here. You even tempted me to remove this story off my profile but I stopped myself._**

 ** _I'm still not sure if I should continue this story anymore, oh well…I guess I'll give this another chance and then decide._**

 ** _I'm sorry for this long headnote. It had to be done, please don't hate me for it, I love my readers! (:_**

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CHAPTER3: A way to get by

 **01** **st** **June 2015**

 **POV MIA KIREI**

Oh. My. God.

I just had the best dream ever. I finally kissed Takumi Walker. It was amazing and it felt so real that I can still feel the hair on my body stand up by just thinking about it. Oh wait, I rub my eyes as I take off the bed covers and stand up. It wasn't a dream. It was fucking real.

I stare at myself, as I brush my hair and I can't wipe the stupid grin off my face. He kissed me. HE KISSED ME. Well, we practically made out. Wow. I can't even…

I find myself laughing as I wash my face and wipe it with a towel. Today is a Sunday. No work! I grin as I get out of my room and go to the living room, I also grab my phone in the process to check if Takumi texted me or something like that. But I find my inbox to be empty, except for a few messages from my friends. I ignore them and put it in my pajama pants. Is it too early for him to text me? Should he have texted me? Should I have texted him? I'm so fucking confused with myself. But I let it go, after all, he did kiss me! Yes, ME! I grin and giggle my way into the kitchen where I see Cath and Nathan eyeing me suspiciously. Cath's in her bra and Nathan is shirtless. Thank god I slept heavily enough to not hear them last night.

"Are you drunk early in the morning, Mia?" Cath asks me. I look at her incredulously. Do I look drunk?!

"Huh? No! Do I look drunk?" I ask her pointing my fingers to myself.

"Well, for one: you're grinning like crazy, and two: you're giggling as if someone keeps tickling you in your pants" Nathan replies and Cath laughs "You're so funny, honey!" and then they proceed to kiss. Ugh, disgusting. I make a face and take the cereal box and take some out in my bowl. I pour chocolate powder and milk over it. "You guys are disgusting" They ignore me, I glance a look in their direction and see them making out, Nathan's pushing off her bra straps and Cath's walking towards their room. Ugh, will they make it to the bedroom?

I feel grossed out but by the time I switch on the TV, putting on the volume high enough to not hear the two, and settle in the sofa with my cereal bowl, I feel at peace and my grin has fully returned back to where it belonged.

I feel all warm all over as I think about Takumi. Does this mean that he actually likes me? I mean, he must have felt something, right? My smile goes away for a moment, what if he was just…I don't know. God damnit, I don't have a full understanding of how the male brains work, especially his brain. But with my experience of being with guys, I know that a guy wouldn't just kiss me like that if he didn't like me. But Takumi Walker was no average guy. I have never been this confused before. I sigh as I see my cereal…it's turned into a puddle of goo. I get up and pour the entire thing in the trash can.

 _\- - - - - - x - - - - - - -_

Takumi ran a hand through his hair as he saw another girl sitting in front of him, he had done this countless times, but still he felt uneasy doing this. He knew what he was doing the wrong thing but he wasn't quite ashamed of it either. It was still the better thing to do. He knew he didn't love her and she sure as hell didn't love him. She loved his money. He looked at her again, his jaw tightened, no regrets.

"So why did you call me here, Takumi?" A woman who went by the name of Kayla asked him, super model, raven hair, brown eyes, you guessed it—Takumi's another way to get by. Takumi gave her a tight smile. _He was better than this,_ he stood up from his recliner and walked towards her, "We can talk somewhere else" he gave her a hand with a smile, chivalry—you could say. The woman smiled as she took his hand and placed her other hand on his chest, "I know just where we could talk" she whispered in his ear suggestively and traced her fingers on the fabric of his shirt, by the time Takumi carefully moved her hand away from his body, she had unbuttoned the top two buttons of his shirt already, he smiled again, "No, I think we just need to talk somewhere in peace."

Kayla pouted and looked at him, "Where? I know just the place! Why don't we head on the 23rd avenue, I've been dying to buy a dress from La' Roche, come on, Takumi!"

"Kayla listen to me,"

"What is it, Takumi?" She asked him twirling hair strands in her fingers, she smiled looking at him and he was getting sick of it all.

"I don't think this is working out" there—he said it. Kayla was silent for a moment but then she laughed it off, "If you don't wanna go shopping with me, it's okay! We can go to some other place, honey." She told him as she pulled him close and started kissing his neck, Takumi held her by the shoulder and heaved a sigh, he looked at her in the eye "I mean, our arrangement. It's not working out." he told her and backed off, "I do hope we can be friends though, you can call me whenever you need me" he told her with a smile and handed her a glass of water.

"What are you saying?" Kayla asked incredulously, "You can't do this to me Takumi! I need you every single day, and I need you right now" she spoke as she pushed him on his chair and sat between his legs, she held his jaw and tried to plant a kiss on his lips while her hands got to work, Takumi stood up, this desperate attempt was not going to stop him. "Please don't make this hard for the both of us, you know I have other things to attend to" he told her and she fell silent.

"Are you saying that you don't want to be with me anymore?" She asked in a small squeaky voice and tears followed, Takumi sighed as he ran a hand through his hair and loosened his tie, just great. He kneeled down so that he was on the same level as her, "Look, don't be sad, it's just that, I cannot continue this affair any longer, I hope you understand."

"Is it the sex? Tell me, Takumi! It can't be the sex! Did you find someone else, I'll correct that bitch right now!" She spoke through fake tears and Takumi sighed, "It's not the sex."

"Then what is it?" she asked him and Takumi stood up, "It's just me," he paused but regained his composure moments later, "And you don't have to be sad, we'll be friends, you wanted to go shopping right?" he looked back at her as he dialed a number, "Cedric will take you shopping right now. Go and celebrate, Kayla. You're a beautiful woman. You shouldn't be sad." He told her with a small smile. Cedric arrived and stuck out a handkerchief.

"But, Takumi…" Kayla stopped midway, well there was nothing she could do now _, there goes another one_ , she sighed and Cedric helped her stand up,

"Goodbye, Kayla" Takumi smiled as he stuck out a platinum card in Cedric's hands, Kayla was out of the door and Takumi looked at Cedric, "Take care of it."

"I will, master," Cedric bowed and left.

 _\- - - - - - x - - - - - - -_

 **POV: MIA**

I'm working on another stupid piece of document, more like scribbling. I can't concentrate. Damn it, its been one week since the kiss. ONE WEEK. And he hadn't contacted me. Well, I didn't either but I didn't wanna seem too desperate, but still, why isn't that jerk contacting me? I sigh, I've been doing this mental debate for a long time now, I did see him twice in the office from far away though. I wonder what he's doing right now. We're in the same building but he so far away from me, I frown as I place the document in the file and put my head down.

The day was awfully slow for me. I kept waiting for Takumi to text me but never did a single text come. Should I have called him first? Maybe I should have. Or maybe he's just busy?

 _Or maybe he's just not that into you._

I remember a magazine article with the same title. What if its true? I frown, here I am—thinking about him every fucking moment of my life and I don't even know what he feels for me. I've never been this confused in my life.

I stop thinking whatever I was thinking as soon as I feel a presence next to me. I stiffen, what if my manager caught me slacking off? I'm so done today. I pull my head up and see…

That creepy gentleman!

I gape at the man, what was his name?

"S-Se—" I stutter, my face is red in embarrassment. Wait, what is he doing here?! Did Takumi send him!?

"It's Cedric" the man smiles, he probably sensed my embarrassment, my heart pounds in my chest as he places a bouquet of roses in my hands. "Uhmm…" I look at the roses, and blush. Fuck my life.

"These are from Mr. Walker. Have a good day, Miss..." his voice flows out elegantly and I nod like some stupid hormonal kid, before I can thank him, he's out of my sight.

I look at the roses in front of me and I literally cannot wipe the grin off my face. Damn it. I spot a card and read it,

 _Good girls must always be aware of the monsters that prey on innocence,_

 _It's not a safe place,_

 _For such a pretty face._

 _-T_

Even if he hadn't signed the note, I would still know that it was from him. Seriously, who else would send me such an ambiguous, and unromantic note with the most romantic gesture that ever existed in the art of wooing? I hate this jerk so much, but right now I can't remove the grin from my face. I want to hit him with a snarky comeback. I decide to text him later. When will I truly unravel the mystery behind Takumi Walker? Oh I wonder.

My day passes more happily than it initially did, thanks to some jerk-face, I decided to text him later when I reach home and took my things. I was heading out from the building when I met Cedric once again inside the elevators. He stopped the elevators for me and bowed when I stepped inside. That man is so elegant I swear.

"Have a good day, Miss?" he asks with a polite smile and I smile back, "Quite, what about you?"

"Likewise," he says and I nod,

The ride to the ground floor is silent and I feel like he wants to say something to me, I look at him questioningly and Cedric stops the elevator midway and I look at him with a freaked out face.

"Miss Kirei, I believe there is something that I have to talk to you about." He looks at me seriously, with a very pained expression on his face.

"What is it?" I ask him, completely hiding the fact that I'm freaked out about being alone in an elevator in the middle of nowhere with a middle aged man!

"I must warn you," he pauses and his face falls, I fall silent, urging him to continue.

" _I have cleaned up a lot of mess_ ," He confesses, and I still don't know what he's talking about. _"…Mess that he didn't intend to make. I do not know how to voice my concerns, but please, Miss Kirei, I can see that my master has taken a liking towards yourself_ ," I blush at his comment, " _But you must be aware that I know how it ends, and you must look before you fall. It might end up ugly, and it would be heart wrenching for me, since you're such an admirable lady,_ " I don't understand what he's talking about, " _You're just like her,_ " I swear I saw him smile for a moment, " _…and I can see why master would adore you, you're different than the other ones despite the resemblance,_ " he speaks and this confuses me more. " _And this is why I must warn you, it's a plea from me—merely a servant, but it would be a shame if I—I…_ " he pauses midway, I can see the crestfallen look on his face and its confusing me. What is he trying to say? Her? Others? Resemblance? Look before you fall? I don't get it, but before I get a chance to ask what he means, he starts the elevator again and gives me a tight smile, " _Forgive me, and forget what I said. We never had this conversation. I hope you don't mention this to anyone again_." He bows and the elevator opens with a ping and Cedric gets out,

"Okay?" I speak, he smiles and bows, the elevator doors close and Cedric disappears from my sight. Now I'm thoroughly confused. Cedric's words echo in my mind the entire way towards home and stay in my head till I fall asleep.

 _\- - - - - - x - - - - - - -_


	5. Chapter 4

—x—

 _Ugh, hello, guys._

 _Sorry, I feel so low today, my head feels like it's going to burst, I've had a really long day._

 _I'm so thankful to all the positive and really long and lovely reviews (In case you haven't noticed, I really love long reviews,) and PMs that I got, you all made my day. Apologies for the short note, I'm not in a position to reply to all the reviews at the moment, maybe I'll do it at the end of this chapter or in the headnote of the next chapter._

 _I love you all, special dedication to everyone who has reviewed so far, you're the reason why I'm continuing._

—x—

 **Chapter 4: The day I knew I was ruined**

—x—

 _"_ _They said a few drinks_

 _Will help me forget her_

 _But after one too many_

 _I know that I will never"_

The script-Nothing

( _The inspiration of this chapter: "Nothing" by The script and "The man who can't be moved" by The script as well, you guys should really listen to these songs when you read this._ )

—x—

 **TAKUMI WALKER:** _Three years ago,_

Emerald eyes that once shone with delight were now dull. Takumi managed to lift up his body from the table and the mess he had managed to create. He looked around the lifelessness in the room and calmly stood up from the recliner and picked up the things—bottles of alcohol (of various kinds), ashtrays, broken glasses, papers, pens, spectacles, and placed them in the trashcan. He looked blankly at the spectacles, and after a pause, he threw them in the trashcan with a chuckle. He'd already lost clarity, what good would they do?

Last night was another mistake, which wasn't new to him, (clearly), he looked at a red colored bra that was placed on his table along with other things, and closed his eyes in disgust. That wasn't a first either—being repulsed from himself that is. He walked away from his work table.

 _How did I get so faded?_

How did he manage to get his shirt torn? He looked at himself in the mirror of the attached washroom and took it off when he spotted scratch marks on his chest. In a flash he'd managed to take the shirt off—only to see lipstick marks, nail marks, and scratches all over. He'd turned around and saw his back covered in nail marks, some even bled and he laughed in loathing as he ran a hand through his hair.

 _I thought I was better than this._

He threw the shirt and stepped inside the shower box. The water faucet was turned on and blazing hot water poured all over his body as he tried to wash the evidence that some other girl than _her_ had ever touched him.

Why was the regret still consuming him? When he had been the one to do this to himself, then why? Why couldn't he be just as stoic as before his days in Japan?

 _Why?_

He found himself in another meaningless party hours later. He lived a life wherein he could never find more than minutes of solitude. He was always supposed to be somewhere. The glass of wine in his hand had become a wise companion, he could never get through all this shit sober. He was always present, nodding, but never living.

Hours would pass within the blink of an eye and it always ended the same way. He'd find himself in the arms of some other girl, and he was always drunk enough to _forget_ it all, even if it was only for a moment.

This was precisely one of those repeated moments.

"Hey handsome, you smell amazing" she spoke in his ear and he gave her a lazy stare, what was her name?

He didn't need to remember that.

"Takumi, on a serious note, I've been wanting to say something to you," she continued as she caressed his hair while she kissed him on the jaw, he laughed, it always went down like this. Of course he knew what she'd been wanting to say…

"I know," he chuckled with an arrogant smirk, never a smile, he held her chin and looked into her eyes as he cornered her into a wall, "But I think you should know this," he traced her jaw, fingers trailing down her neck as his leg parted her legs and she shivered, "That I do not love you," he told her as he placed a kiss on the center of her collarbone, other hand in her hair, "Yet you won't stop me when I'll have my way with you," he ran a hand through her raven hair, "Because you want the sex, you don't want my soul," his hand was up to no good as it rested under her skirt, "And trust me, when I say that you don't want to know about my soul," he laughed.

 _What have I become?_

—x—

 **MIA KIREI presently,**

Okay, so I managed to have a normal conversation with that jerk face, after the kiss thing. He was quite normal about it all, and I think that this kiss has affected me much, much more than it has affected him. I know I have been over-stressing about this guy a little bit too much from the start. But can you really blame me? Have you seen how perfect he is?

Ugh.

I literally hate myself.

But I can't solely blame myself, I am just a simple and good girl. And good girls are drawn towards danger. And I haven't seen something as dangerous as Takumi Walker in my life.

Don't get me wrong with the dangerous part. He doesn't belong to the mafia or anything. He's dangerous because I know what he can do to me. I know how he can destroy me.

 _He won't even have to try._

And I am beginning to feel that this destruction will begin way before I'll be able to comprehend it.

Or maybe I'm being too dark today.

Takumi has invited me to his place today, I don't know what to expect. He said it would be a simple dinner after work. I am filled with anticipation to the brim. My face is getting red by just imaging different scenarios that may take place today.

What if he kisses me again?

What if we do something much, much more?

My desperation levels burst through the roof when I took a sick leave only to think about all this useless shit. I feel so nervous. I want to die. The urge to hide myself in the blankets and kill my phone are very prominent within me at the moment, but at the same instant, the butterflies are invading my entire body. I feel so…ugh!

I rummage through my closet and I realize that my room is now a mess. There's clothes everywhere! And I can't decide what I should wear. I don't want to come off too desperate, or uninterested. I just can't decide anything today.

 _That is what you do to me, you fucking asshole._

I bury my hands in my hair as I look at all this…mess. How am I supposed to get ready when he comes to pick me up? A glance towards my wrist watch makes me realize that I don't have much time left, and I should probably get ready since he's so fucking punctual about everything.

I come across a denim dress and put it on, at this point I'm so stressed that I don't even care anymore. A simple lipstick and eyeliner gets me ready. Since my hair's short, I have no choice but to leave them open. I just cannot wait for my hair to grow back to their medium length, maybe I'll even grow out my bangs.

Takumi stands at the entrance of my apartment and my heart stops the moment I open the door. I literally gape at his perfect-ness and try to calm my heart, "Wait a sec" I blurt out as always and slam the door shut in his face. I hear him chuckle and I am so ready to die.

I literally slide down the door like a dramatic queen and calm down my fucking heart, after a moment I feel okay, and I step out as if nothing happened.

"Okay, let's go" I tell him in a tour guide voice and walk out, he follows me and I can feel his amusement.

He opens the door of his car for me like a gentleman. I sit down, and look in front, "Where do you live again?" I ask him and he scoffs, "Pfft, I live in a house, made up of bricks and wood and concrete, just like you." He says and I laugh, "Well of course, not like I was saying you were an alien who lives in a spaceship, on some planet in outer space." I laugh.

He's silent.

I whip my head in his direction, "Kirei," he speaks and I laugh it off, "Okay, I'm sorry for offending you with my jokes," I tell him dryly and he looks at me with calculating eyes. I feel like I made him go on all alert with a harmless joke. However, I don't want the evening to be ruined, so I stay silent and so does he. The drive to his home was silent afterwards.

We reached fifteen minutes later, I was silently thankful that the ride was over, I don't know what triggered him, since I don't know him that well. Maybe someday he'll open up with me.

His mansion is beautiful.

He holds my hand and we walk inside together; that sure escalated quickly. I look around in awe and appreciation. He sure worked hard to achieve all this, "I'm really proud of you, you know, for working hard and achieving success," I tell him and he nods; and I think I saw him smile for a moment, but it disappeared a bit too fast.

We're in the living room when he hands me a glass of wine, "You'll like this" he tells me as he clinks glasses with me, "What is this?" I ask him, but he doesn't tell me the name of the wine. "Just try it," he tells me as he sips from his glass. I agree, the wine tastes heavenly.

"So, will you show me around?" I ask him with a small smile, he nods and takes my hand. We walk along the corridors and shows me around.

The mansion is huge with modern furniture and décor. On the contrary, from the paintings and decorations I realize that they're vintage classics. I can deduce that he's into literature and art. We sit down in the library when I check his collection…

"You have a very good taste," I marvel at the sight of the large shelves of books sitting in the library, he nods "Thanks,"…we went to the different areas of the mansion and I think that the library was the best. "I can bet that the library is the only place that you use the most." I tell him.

"How can you deduce that?" he asks me with a raised eyebrow.

"Because I can imagine you here, because you're just that kind of person. People bore you. Books don't," I smile and his eyes are widened, but he says nothing.

God, a sick feeling crosses my stomach. I feel like I am completely missing something. But I cannot put a finger on it. I don't understand why I feel like I'm overseeing something huge. I don't understand the mystery behind Takumi. Does he really live in such a huge mansion by himself? Doesn't he have any friends or family? I don't see any.

"So, your family doesn't live here?" I ask him with a little hesitation, is it too personal?

"The Walker family stays in the Raven Castle." He tells me, "It's just me here."

"You like being alone, don't you?"

"You have no idea." He tells me and like many times before—I can feel the darkness in his voice, suddenly, I feel just so bad. I don't know why but I feel like he has been through something unimaginable, I don't get why my sixth senses are screaming to hug him. I decide to trust my instincts and hug him.

He's as stiff as a rock at first, but then he embraces me. I smile, at least he didn't repulse me, he lifts me up and makes me sit down on the top of the wooden table. "You shouldn't do that" he tells me and I look up with a huge blush on my face. "If you'll do that, then I'll be tempted to do this," he breathes out the words, and kisses me on the lips.

I don't realize what just happens until he pulls away from me and I look at him in a daze. I just feel like there were so much emotions involved with this kiss but I can't pinpoint them. He raises his right hand and it comes towards me, I look at him, he looks so adorable. He extends his arm to pat my head, I think, but he pulls back without doing so. I raise an eyebrow to question him what he's trying to do, but he completely disregards doing it and turns around, "So, hungry?" he asks and by the time I get down from the table, he's standing at the door, waiting for me.

"Do you have a girlfriend?" I ask him when we're in the middle of dinner, and he looks at me questionably, "Do I come off as a cheater?" his answer is a question, and I feel like rolling my eyes at him. Does he know how much strength it took to ask him that question? Don't get me wrong, I have reasons for asking him that. One, I don't want to be kept in the dark about anything. And two, I don't think that a guy like him can ever be interested in a girl like me. I mean, shouldn't he be dating supermodels and actresses?

He pokes my cheek when I'm lost in my thoughts, and I get so heated up. Doesn't he realize what his touch does to me yet?

"Well that woke you up," he smirks and I gape at him. Perverted bastard. Of course he knows what his touch does to me. _It ignites me._

"Well, no, I don't think that you're a cheater."

"I don't cheat." He tells me and I nod. I go back to my food and he chuckles, "What?" I ask him, what the fuck is he laughin' at?

"Nothing at all" he assures me by squeezing my hand and I nod again, since I am speechless due to the gesture.

Ice cream's for desert and he places two glass bowls on the table, I smile with a polite "Thank you."

"My pleasure" he gives me a small smile and I nod, "Do you have any dark chocolate?" I ask him and he pauses for a moment, as if thinking, "I guess I do, wait, let me get it." He stands up and I follow him with my bowl. "Have you ever tried melted dark chocolate with ice cream?"

"That's rather a strange combination" he smirks as he hands me the chocolate. I take a glass bowl and put pieces of dark chocolate in it and pop it into the oven, "Just try it for once." I tell him as I cross my arms and wait for it to ping.

"You want me to try strange things" he looks at me with a perverted face and I feel like punching him, it's not like I asked him to try some new sex position! Ew!

"You're such a pervert sometimes, it betrays your scary CEO image," I speak dryly as the ping sound alerts me, I take out the warm melted chocolate and pour some over my bowl. I take a spoonful and bring it close to his mouth, "Try it"

"I have a scary image?" He inquires as he puts the spoon in his mouth and I can't help but think how sexy he looks, my face reddens and I look away, "Well, yeah. Everyone thinks you're scary in office." I look away as I search for another spoon.

"They do?" He asks as he lifts my chin to make me look at him and takes the spoon from my hands and takes out more ice cream to put it in my mouth. I am so flustered, "Mhm..." I tell him when he dips his index finger in the melted chocolate and literally licks the finger as if it's the most delicious thing he has ever tasted.

"Yes, they do. It's not their fault if you ask me." I look away and pick up my ice cream bowl as if nothing is happening inside my body right now. I should have stuck to the hiding under blankets plan.

"Am I scary?" he asks me as he lifts up my wrist and plants a kiss on my palm.

"You're uh…" I'm searching for words, what was the question again? His lips trail up on my arm and he plans another kiss as he waits for me to continue.

"You're…" I don't know what's happening to me anymore. He pulls away after a moment and I look up, he's back to his stoic mode and I don't know how to react. I just do what my heart tells me to.

I kiss him like there's no tomorrow.

He doesn't respond at first but when I bite his lower lip, he loses it. He picks me up and I found myself on the top of the kitchen counter, I kiss him more, I don't know where such passion came from, but its impossible for me to stop when I've had a taste of him. My hands are moving all over his chest and my body has a mind of its own. He does not disappoint me with his kisses and touches. My body is on fire and I don't realize that I've taken his shirt off.

"Don't hold back," I speak, breathless and he holds my chin to kiss me more. We're breathless and he stops. He's looking me in the eyes and I feel so mesmerized. Forest green irises, so wild, so untamable… he's fucking shirtless in front of me, looking at me like _that._ I just might beg him at this point.

"Don't hold back, Takumi" I pull him closer and kiss his collarbone. He looks at me in the eye, "You'll regret this, I don't want to taint you," he confesses and kisses my hair, doesn't he know that I'm stubborn?

"I'll regret it more if you don't," I tell him with a shy smile and I bite my lip in nervousness, "I am trying hard to control myself, I don't want to do something that will flaw you" he tells me and I roll my eyes at him as I unzip my dress, "I am not an angel, Takumi." I tell him and my body moves on my own as my hands reach my underwear,

"Don't tempt me, Mia. You're laid out in front of me like fucking desert, do you know what I could do to you?" he's warning me now, two can play this game.

"Well, you're tempting me," I tell him and my hands are going places they shouldn't. He's gripping the counter and I can feel him losing control. " _You shouldn't do that, Kirei_ " he tells me with a glare in Japanese, I smile, what has taken over me?

" _Touch me, Takumi_ " words come out on their own and I marvel at the fact that my Japanese is improving. I smile as I kiss him and he forgets all his doubts that were on his mind. I didn't realize it right away, but that was the day I knew I was ruined for good. And I couldn't have cared less.

 **Oh god, this is the hardest chapter that I have ever written of any story, it was so hard to keep it within T bounds, but I think it was T++…anyhow, I shall discuss more of MFUH later. Comment upon the title of the chapter and write to me! I feel so overwhelmed by emotions after writing this chapter. Gosh! Much love!**


	6. Chapter 5

**—** **x—x—**

 **Four years ago, Japan.**

 _It was pitch black._

Takumi frantically searched for her in the empty, rotten warehouse. It was an abandoned building that was once used for keeping stocks by Walker corp. Perfect place for that fucker to hide. There was only so much light in the empty place. From his position, Takumi could only make out the silhouettes of junk being scattered all around the place. Sweat beaded his skin as he worried about Misaki. Where could she be right now? He could only _hope_ that she was okay.

His eyes took less than a nano-second to spot the flicker of light coming from south. He tried to pull himself and _detach_ himself from these bounds, but he couldn't. They were too strong, even for him.

He tried to focus his gaze, which was hard considering the fact that he was not wearing his spectacles. His contacts had gotten dirty when he was _manhandled_ and _shoved_ to be brought in this train-wreck of a place that stunk of alcohol and death. After a while, he could make out that the light came from a cigarette lighter, Takumi sighed. _There—_ was his "brother", he had finally spotted the damn bastard.

"This is a new low, even for you." He chuckled, why was _Gerard_ doing this? He didn't know. He didn't care. He just wanted Misaki to be safe. The sound of malicious laughter echoed through the entire rundown place, "Well, you did not certainly leave me any other choice, _brother."_ He spat.

"All I wanted was for you to leave me alone, for some time." Takumi sighed. This was not the first time they were having this conversation. He had even agreed to be the _heir_ , and return to England. He had even signed the damn contract which made him the official heir of the Walker fortune, following Gerard and his grandfather's ill health. He had agreed to everything and returned back from England. He had switched to Miabigaoka. He had agreed to every stupid thing that they wanted, but they still couldn't just leave him be.

"Ah, I wanted to do the same brother, but you see, it was becoming important for me to teach you a lesson. You attract too much attention." He finished the sentence as he took another puff of the cigarette, "and that girl is becoming a nuisance as well."

"I told you to stay away from her." Takumi said, a bit too quickly, he couldn't help but get defensive when it came to his favourite Ayuzawa. Gerard had snickered when he heard Takumi's voice get louder. "My my, found true love, have you?"

"It's none of your business." Takumi spat, and looked away.

"Well you see, it is my business" He laughed, "When will you ever learn? A petty dog like you should know his place." He laughed maniacally as he clapped his hands and the lights were switched on. "I have put together a show for you, little _brother."_

"What the fuck are you plotting" Takumi's voice rose as soon as he saw three armed men enter the place. There was a lot of yelling involved as Misaki kept kicking them as two other men held her arms to prevent her from escaping. "Where the hell are you taking me? Answer me right away!"

Takumi's eyes had widened the moment he had seen Misaki and he immediately tried to move towards her, his anger rose as the men tried to subdue her. But he was helpless, because he was tied to iron chains. "You bastard." He glared at Gerard, who was quite enjoying the scene.

"My my, what a drama! I feel like I'm watching some kind of English play. Romeo and Juliet reimagined, perhaps?" He laughed as his men tied Misaki to a chair while she fought, she had not looked at Takumi yet, nor was she aware of his presence in the dark. Gerard merely laughed as Takumi tried to free himself.

There was not much Misaki could do. She was going back from Maid latte, to meet Takumi, when these men had shoved her into a car. She had tried to fight them, but they had drugged her un-conscious. The next thing she knew, she was in some shady warehouse, being carried by these men! Being under strong effect of the drugs, she was quite dull. Her movements were a slur but she did try her best.

Those men had managed to tie her down, but she kept on trying to move relentlessly. Gerard had decided to finally have her attention.

"I believe we meet again, Miss Ayuzawa." He smiled benevolently and Misaki's eyes had widened. "Y-You…" she was silent.

"Now, I think that you were on your way to meet my little brother, right? So I decided to bring you two together." He smiled as he pointed towards a far corner, Misaki's eyes had widened the moment she saw Takumi being chained down. She had almost stopped protesting that moment and let the sight fully sink in.

"U-Usui…" she mumbled to herself, he was a total mess with his clothes half torn and dirty. There was blood on his knuckles and she had truly never seen him in such a state. She turned her gaze away, she was going to get the both of them freed no matter what.

"To think that someone could ever treat their own brother like that," she looked at Gerard in the eye, "How can you do that to your own blood?! You sick monster!" she spat angrily.

"I don't think you're in a position to argue," he laughed as he pulled her chin towards himself. Misaki glared at him. He smelled of cigarettes and death. She laughed, "You're pathetic if you think that you can force me into leaving him by chaining him." Gerard's eyes had widened this moment. And he was at a loss of words.

"If you think you can just stop me from being with _Takumi_ by using such pathetic methods, you're utterly stupid." She looked at Takumi confidently, "I know you can free yourself, Takumi." She smiled at him and Takumi smirked as he looked at Gerard.

"I know that you're a smart woman, Miss Ayzuawa." Gerard spoke as he turned her chair around such that Misaki and Takumi were facing each other. One roped to the chair and other bound with chains. "But my brother isn't. He's stupid in love. You see, I will make sure that my mother's _mistake…"_ he looked at Takumi, who glared at him the moment Gerard placed his hands on her neck, "…doesn't repeat itself. He's just like her. Falling for a filthy Japanese commoner," he spat angrily, "I won't allow it!" he spat as he pulled out a sharp knife and put it around Misaki's neck.

"You won't do anything to her!" Takumi yelled as he tried to break free, his hands bled but he didn't care. He tried to break away and was not much far away from Gerard.

"Miss Ayuzawa is right, I cannot stop her, but I can do something to ensure that my brother _obeys_ me like a good pet should." He laughed as he plunged the knife in Misaki's thigh. Her screams echoed through the entire hall, Takumi pulled the chains to stop him, he had never felt so useless before.

"Will you listen to me _now_?"

"Takumi!" She hiccupped, saying his name like that was an impulse as she fought through the pain, "You will _not_ listen to him! Don't be an idiot!"

" _Or will you_ , little brother?" Gerard hummed as he dragged the knife along the length of her arms, "Forget physically harming her, even if I let her go, you do realize the lengths I can go as a Walker to ensure that her professional life ends before it actually begins, right? And let's not forget her little family…" he smiled as Takumi stilled.

"Takumi don't listen to him! He's playing you!" Misaki yelled through the tears as Gerard licked the bloody knife, looking at Takumi. The hair on Takumi's hands stood out as his mind ran in a lot of circles.

He looked at Misaki as she fought back the tears and the pain. Was this what she deserved? Why was he making her go through all this? Hadn't he tried to escape the Walker name only to realize that he can never fully escape it? His mind ran through a lot of conclusions as he looked at her. She was the only person he was able to love. Wasn't he just risking her life by being with her?

Gerard brought the knife near the neck as Misaki looked at Takumi with tears. Her leg was bleeding terribly and Takumi knew she had to be treated soon. Gerard traced the tip of the knife on Misaki's collarbone as she yelled, "Takumi, I love you! Don't listen to him! We can make it through! Now is not the time to be stupid! Takumi!" She kept yelling but all Takumi could see was the knife on her neck.

"I love you…" she sobbed as Gerard dragged the knife along her neck with more pressure. Blood escaped as she smiled and Takumi lost it.

It was pitch black.

It was in that moment that he had actually realized how helpless he truly was. No matter how far he would run, he would be circled right back in. He realized that even if he fought his identity, it would still stay. The Walker name was a shadow he could never escape.

So he let go.

He gave up.

He drowned in the darkness.

—x—x—

 **Presently,**

He woke up covered in sweat and tears, his body was shaking as he stared at the empty sheets. He looked at his hands, there was no blood on them. He looked around and then the realization had finally sunk in—it was just a memory. In a dream.

He sat up on the bed and looked at the watch. 3AM.

 _It was pitch black._

He looked around and found the silhouette of someone sleeping soundly.

It was Mia.

Now that brought him back to reality. He ran a hand through his hair and closed his eyes. He didn't notice when the girl lying on the bed shifted and mumbled. Takumi looked up as he pulled the bed covers over her. She was probably cold, he thought. So he pulled the covers.

He decided to shove the darkness of his past and thought about the events that led to Mia sleeping naked in his bed. He hadn't meant for it to happen. He thought that she was too pure for him, and he didn't want to taint her.

It seemed to him that he was beginning to lose his self-control too, just like all the other things he'd lost.

"T-Takumi, is that you?" He heard her small voice and looked in her direction.

Mia pulled up the covers to cover her breasts and looked at him shyly. "Is everything okay?" She asked him. Takumi merely nodded with a small smile, "Go back to sleep, Kirei."

"Did you have a bad dream?" She inquired, Takumi stilled.

He pulled up her covers as he turned towards her and cupped her cheek, "Its nothing. Go to sleep." He mumbled.

"Sleep with me," she spoke softly, with a light blush on her face. Takumi smirked, "I believe I did. Am I that irresistible?" Mia gaped and pulled him back, making him fall back, "Just come and sleep." She said as she buried her face in his chest and Takumi was silent. Mia closed her eyes as she pressed her lips on his arm, "Good night."

The next morning, Mia woke up to an empty bed. She rubbed her eyes and put on her shirt when she heard the bath running.

 _It was 7am in the morning, and this man was getting ready already._

Mia rolled her eyes at the thought. Why'd he have to be so uptight about everything? A small smile came on her face as she thought about last night. She bit her lip, were they an official couple now? Mia buried her face in the blankets.

"You're up." Takumi stated as he walked out as he put a shirt on. Mia whipped her head up and looked at him, it was hard to put a straight face on in front of him when he looked so serious. She tried to hide her smile and failed miserably, how was he able to turn her to jelly like that? She felt all squeaky and giddy—almost as if she was fangirl-ing him. He raised an eyebrow as he finished putting his shirt inside his pants. "What is it?"

"Nothing!" She spoke, a bit too fast. Now that she had admitted to herself that she actually had feelings for him and after what all happened, Mia was still in a daze. She looked at him with a dreamy smile as she held his tie and gave it to him, "Do you want me to help you?"

Takumi took it without any word and began to make the knot, "Ah, I can manage on my own." He spoke, "Breakfast is ready downstairs." He told her as he walked towards his closet to fetch his cufflinks. Mia looked at his retreating back, she wished he had more time on his hands to spend with her, but she let the thought go, she was going to see him in office anyway.

"What time do you go to office?" she asked him as she stood by the doorframe of the closet and watched him put on his cufflinks in awe. What a beautiful specimen of a man, her inner self remarked.

"Around eight. What about you, Mia?" he asked her with a smirk, "What a shame that your boss reaches the office before you."

"W-Well," she cleared her throat defensively, "You aren't my direct boss; Aaron is my manager. And my reporting time is nine thirty. I'm never late."

"We can change that." he said as he finished getting ready and looked at her. Mia had melted right then and there. She had actually seen him get ready for work. She always wondered what his daily routine was, and now she knew.

This all was surreal for her. She had developed a lot of affection for him in the past few weeks, and she had never even imagined that a man like would ever show interest in a girl like her. Without a doubt, she was on cloud nine and couldn't even believe it, but she didn't want any favours from him.

"I don't want to benefit professionally from our relationship, in any way." She told him with a sincere smile, "I don't want you for your money or position, Takumi. I will achieve everything that I want with my own work." She spoke, and Takumi smiled for the first time in the entire morning. "That's a good thought."

"I know, boss!" She laughed and pretend-saluted him. Takumi smirked, "What kind of employee stands in front of their boss wearing nothing but a loose, and almost see through t-shirt?" he asked her with an amused expression, Mia shot back, "What kind of boss sleeps with their employee?"

"One which wants to provide their employee with the _best services_ for their hard work." He said with a chuckle as he lifted her up and supported her against the wall, "Right?"

Mia laughed as she bit his lower lip, "Shouldn't you thank me for my hard work too?"

"I'm less verbal, more physical." He said as his hand went under her shirt and he kissed her. She landed on the bed with a thud after a hard core make out session, "Get ready, I'm downstairs," he told her with a smirk as he left her—flabbergasted, needy, blushing, and closed the bedroom door.

-xx-xx-xx-

 **POV: MIA KIREI**

I ran towards my apartment door from the elevator as soon as it opened and banged my door loudly, I was late damn it. Cath took long, she was all dressed up for work and looked at me strangely.

"Mia, what took you so long?!"

"Can't talk, late!" I told her as I ran towards my room and changed.

Takumi had dropped me at my apartment before heading towards his office and I was royally late. I rummaged through my clothes and put on a black formal dress, a little lipstick and fixed my hair. It was a good thing that I showered at his place, else I would have gotten more late then I already was. I was out and ready in ten minutes and ran behind Cath, since we shared a car together.

"Wow," She remarked as she started the car and I fixed my bangs while sitting in the passenger seat. She had noticed the annoying smile that wasn't going away from my face. I rolled my eyes and failed pathetically at a miserable attempt of keeping a straight face.

"Let's face it, you're made up of cotton candy and marshmallows, you can never pull of the serious stoic face." She laughed and that cracked me up too. We laughed as Cath drove us to work.

"So, give me the details." She whispered and I laughed, "It will have to wait," I told her as the Walker Corporation came into view. We stepped out and when I was giving myself one last look in the mirror, Cath held me by the shoulders, "Did you do it, with you-know-who?" she spoke in a whisper, as she looked at the left and the right. I nodded with a sly smile.

"Damn, girl!" She remarked, "Wow, you hit _that_? I am so jealous!" she said as we laughed, "I know, its too surreal for me too. I mean, how can a guy like—"

"Mia, you're late!" Aaron stood in front of us with crossed arms. I smiled apologetically and excused myself from Cath.

"I want you to review these." He drowned me in a pile of documents and I nodded as I began, that smile never truly left my face the entire day.

It was like he was my first crush or something.

I couldn't stopped thinking about it, until a thought crossed my mind—A thought, that proved out to be very dangerous for me in the long run.

 _Is this love?_

 **|| READ || REVIEW || FAVORITE || FOLLOW ||**

 **Author's rambling segment:**

 **Yes, I updated.**

I know, I've been super busy. November was the busiest month of the year of me. I had project submissions, practical and theoretic exams. Plus I got pretty sick to the point that I was very close to collapsing. A lot happened, there was a strange pain in my ears and head to the point that I could not bear to hear even the sound of human voice. There was a lot of pain and crying involved. BUT I'm fine now, and I'm back.

 **About the flashback.**

Oh gosh! I don't know if that was hard to read, but it was hard to write goddamnit! I mean, its so intense. Well, I will post the remaining half of the flashback in coming chapters. So stay with me, you can do this!

 **Also,**

Is anyone here good at drawing? I was wondering if anyone of you here liked to draw. Actually, I really wanted a sketch for putting it as the cover image of this story. Just a simple sketch, nothing too much. _I would have done it myself,_ but I suck at drawing. I can neither draw, nor dance. For real. So if anyone is interested, please PM me. I have a few ideas that I'd like to share. And maybe I could do something for you in return, idk. I could Beta for you, or give you some ideas for stories, or give you a story line, or help you in any way I possibly can!

 **About the updates,**

Now that I'm back, I really want to get back to updating all the stories. I'm free at least till January. So I will be writing. A lot. (I hope).

 **Getting back to the previous reviews:**

 _Candy2045_ _chapter 5 . Oct 26_

 _OMG! so hot chap. I like this chap espicially last part. That scene was funny "I literally slide down the door like dramatic queen". I feel bad for takumi :( im exited for the next chap. U know i love all of ur story. Ur stories r one of favourites and update soon :)_

Candy2045 chapter 5 . Oct 26

And please dont give up on ur story ur doing great :)

 **Thank you, XD I know right. Mia can be very dramatic sometimes. I guess that's what makes her adorable and girly! I feel bad for Takumi too, even more in this chapter. And Thank you! I love you! I will update more I promise (:**

 _iloveanime1322_ _chapter 5 . Oct 26_

 _I really enjoyed this chapter, as I have with entire story so far. I can't say that I wouldnt mind a little M rated stuff going on because I feel like this story could handle it easily but I think it is still great as rated T as well. I think you are creating a line between T and M that is perfectly balanced. And Oh Takumi, what are you doing to all of us?!_

 **Thank you, I feel like I do want to make it M rated, but I don't know if I could write all the mature scenes that well, I'll give it a try! Hah! I know, Takumi is a frigging sex machine or something.**

 _BluberryRose_ _chapter 5 . Oct 27_

 _WHAT DA FUCK  
KIREI, YOU EVIL BITCH XD  
I'm kidding, good job. However, I will personally come up to those two whores and fucking bitch slap their ugly faces.  
It was so painful to read, my god XD  
Anyway, I know you have something coming up for us readers. You do your thing, Rose.  
Kisses and roses from Kyra_

 **Kyra! My girl! XD sorry you went through emotional pain reading that chapter, but you'll feel even worse after reading this one, I gotta run for my life!**

 _Leopio_ _chapter 5 . Oct 27_

 _Is there really no chance for takumi seems to be like a weak man.m is is like Anastasia Steele from 50 shades except she is not a virgin._

 **Hi there! I feel like the 50 shades trilogy and MfUH do share some fucked up-ness but I don't think Takumi is like Christian. I could never write smut that well XD**

 _Guest_ _chapter 5 . Oct 27_

 _WTF! I mean seriously how dare she? Don't take me wrong but I m really not liking this girl Mia. I mean she is literally behaving like our misaki and takumi too is starting to like her. I mean seriously...how can he? Or rather how dare he? He belongs to misaki and only her! This 8s all that 8s on my mind right now...please do not take it in any negative way...I m already too nervous while writing it. I know i promised u that i wont review...but I hope that ull forgive me. I m really sweat dropping...(nervous laughs). Please update when u can. And forgive me if I offended u ...really looking forward for more of this story and m reallu hopping that our misa will enter soon and this Mia goes out..._

 _Minniemiss123_ _chapter 1 . Oct 27_

 _Sorry I forgot to write my username in my review...it's the one starting with WTF. I mean seriously...that one. Sorry for that mistake.:P :P_

 **LOL, I know you HATE Mia, Minnie, XD But think about it, Mia and Misa are not alike. Do you think Misa could ever be so open? And, it's okay for you to review. That's what its for. I'm neither mad at you nor do I want you to stop reviewing. Don't be nervous, I love you, okay?**

 _Lady Stradivari_ _chapter 5 . Oct 28_

 _I am so happy to hear that you decided to continue this story! Thank you for hearing us out! :) I am certain that there are other readers who love this story as well who are happy that you updated. I hope the idea motivates you to write this.  
So far, I am loving it. Am I the only person who is not fazed by TakuMia? (Did I just...? Haha anyway,) I know this relationship is not going to last, basically because you did reveal that Misaki will be making her appearance soon, and after all, she is the protagonist of this story, and Takumi's interactions with Mia do not mean anything to him, unlike Mia, who takes everything to heart. What bothers me, however, is that Mia does have an idea of how their relationship would end up to be, and how much it would destroy her, but she says that she "couldn't have cared less" - I am not okay with that, because I believe that everyone should save some love for themselves, and even a hint of self-preservation, at least. But I guess that is how she delivers her definition of love here. Aw, Mia. How pitiful you have come to be. (This just proves how much I love anti-heroes. Seriously.)  
There were instances which proved that the relationship is not going to last: Takumi does not reveal much about himself, and Mia feels as if she needs to do something more just to get closer to him. At least, this is how I perceived it based from this chapter. What struck me here though is how Takumi was holding back sometimes. Probably because he was reminded of Misaki when Mia quipped him with the "perverted space alien" line. He must have sensed some guilt within himself-he may be thinking that Misaki would not want to see his present self. Because of this, I think that he still has a shot at redemption, and Mia could be the one to lead him further down that road. I wonder what Takumi's thinking while he and Mia are together. I hope you enlighten us in the next chapter. :)  
Ugh, forgive me if I am not making sense right now- I just woke up from a four hour nap and my head is aching. XD As for the name of this chapter, I will not be assuming anything complicated here and just put this out here- I think the name applied to both of them: How Takumi knew he f***ed things up, and how he just let it all happen; and how Mia knew that Takumi was no good, yet she just let it all happen too. They are quite similar in this sense.  
At first, I thought this was going to be a short review of this chapter, but I am surprised at how it ended up this long. XD You did mention that you loved long reviews, so I guess it's fine. Thank you for the update. Will be waiting patiently for the next one! :)  
\- LS_

 **I live for your reviews. Seriously. You make me fangirl, hard. Hahah! I love long reviews, so don't worry about that. I love how you are always able to GET what I'm trying to imply in the scenes. Its magic. I cannot wait for you to tell me what you thought of this update. I agree with you, its like Takumi still has some guilt left. Even though he has lost everything, even his self control. I wonder what Misa would think about the state Takumi is now reduced to?**

 _Ishita.d_ _chapter 5 . Nov 1_

 _I don't know..my heart just feels heavy after reading this chap..I just feel bad for her and him so broken breaks my heart. .Anyways another well put together chap._

 **Thank you, my heart feels heavy whenever I write MFUH, I guess its just the storyline that makes you so overwhelmed.**

 _amyjane1200_ _chapter 5 . Nov 6_

 _Great chapter as usual. Takumi's character kinda reminds me of Christian Grey from Fifty shades of grey. They are both 50 shades of fcked up and I am loving it so far hahaha. I wonder when Misaki will make her appearance..._

 **Oh gosh, is he really like Christian Grey? I gotta re-evaluate XD, anyhow. I wonder how Misaki would react if she met Takumi.**

 _Guest_ _chapter 5 . Nov 23_

 _Well of course, not like I was saying you were an alien who lives in a spaceship, on some planet in outer space." I laugh.  
He's silent.  
This part gave me hard core goosebumps.. Misaki will come back for Takumi right? Takumi will find his love again right? Even though I like Kirei..I just can't picture Takumi with someone else especially when he is still hopelessly in love with his Misaki ..._

 **That scene was intense, I agree. My heart was so heavy after I had read it myself too. Thanks for the review.**

 _Guest_ _chapter 5 . Nov 28_

 _I wanna cry -  
i want takumisa  
reading takumia is gettng me depressed  
pls updte soon n bring misa-chan in takumi's life_

 **Hi there! I am here with the new update, Please don't be depressed. Good things take time. (:**

 ** _Whew! After all this rambling, I'm feeling tired. I still have one last exam tomorrow! So I guess I'll see y'all around! {: MUCH LOVE from MissKirei._**


	7. Chapter 6

**Chapter 7: Oblivion**

 **POV: MIA KIREI**

"I'm going to Japan!" I almost jumped in joy when I got my letter. It was just a regular afternoon in the Walker Corporation, where I have been working, when I got called in with Aaron and others. Apparently the division of Walker Corporation was having a huge collaboration, and a team had to be sent there from the main headquarters i.e. from London, which is where I am. Aaron could see the gleeful look of happiness in my eyes that he laughed "First trip?"

I nodded "I've been to Europe. But this will be my first time in Asia, or Japan more precisely."

"It's a one week trip, you're lucky to get a chance to go overseas so early in your job so soon." Aaron nodded as he crossed his arms and leaned against the wall, "I'm happy for you."

"Thank you…how do you say it in Japanese? Sensei?" I grinned as I did a formal bow.

Aaron laughed as he bowed back "We shouldn't be goofing off, get your stuff ready, we leave in three days. Now lets get back to work, we have to finish off a lot before we leave."

"Okay, sei-sey!"

"It's sensei…you know." Aaron grinned as he left towards his cabin. I nodded as I began my work.

"Okay, let's get this done." I cracked my knuckles and got to work.

After three long hours, I was finally done with my work. I picked up the files and headed towards my destination. I was just in time to deliver all the files to the CEO's PA, I stepped inside the elevators and headed up. My heart thrummed loudly in my chest as I hoped to see Takumi. I was going to the same floor as his own and I could only hope to spot him.

"Come in" Takumi's PA said through the door and I went in. I placed the files and signed my name. I looked around in her lavish office, which was just across the hall from Takumi's office. On my way back, I took the long way around, purposely just to have a glimpse of him. And I actually saw him. Takumi's office door was open, for some reason, and he was deep in work. I stood near the office with a smile as my heart fluttered. He was my opposite, deep and serious, working, not knowing that I was standing there.

Reluctantly I left within seconds, and that was the creepiest thing I have ever done in my life.

But it was worth it.

He was worth it.

He didn't know how he made my heart squeeze in ways I cannot even understand myself. The sight of him is truly one to behold. I sighed as I sat down on my chair. I really wanted to see him. We haven't met since an entire week because he was busy.

I don't understand why I feel a weird kind of pain in my heart whenever I am away from him. I have never felt so attached to someone before. The attraction and attachment that I seem to have developed for him is something more than the scope of my thinking. I don't understand it, yet I embrace this feeling. Why?

What are you doing to me, Takumi? At this point, I have put my head down on my desk. I feel so…so…

Could it be that the CEO might also be going with the team, to japan?

I sit up as I am filled with anticipation. Could it be? That would be so awesome actually, to get to spend time with him like that.

I look around for Aaron, would it sound weird coming from me if I ask him? I don't know, maybe I should ask Takumi instead. Its not like he wouldn't tell me.

But he'll probably be busy till midnight, maybe I'll call him after that after all…

The wait was agonizing, I decided to call him at 11pm, thinking that he must be free by then. The bell went and I am now waiting for him to pick up.

"Why are you still up?" he asks me, is this a way to greet someone on the phone?

A smile creeps up on my face before I can control it. "Is this how you usually talk to people?"

"No."

"Then why me?"

"Because, you're different?" he said and I can imagine him smirking!

"Different?"

"Yes." There comes his mono syllabic reply. Why is he so hard to talk to? I swear it is so hard to get a straight reply from him!

"I am going to Japan on a project!" I said and I can't help but giggle like a child! What must he think of me?

"Japan?" He asks quietly.

"Yes, aren't you aware?"

"I didn't know there was a project in Japan."

"Some CEO you are" I mumble and it doesn't go unheard on his ears. He chuckles "I'm sorry, did I disappoint you?"

"Yes, I thought you were going too." I mumbled half-heartedly, "I was hoping you would show me around and—"

"Mia I have to look after things here,"

I am stunned, it sure didn't take him long to reply…

"Uh, okay…some other time I guess." I say, what else could I have said?

He sighs, "Mia, I have some responsibilities here. I cannot just leave and come with you."

"I didn't ask you to come, I said I thought you were!"

Jerk.

"Are you angry?" he asks quietly, I sighed, "I'm not angry, just disappointed." I confess, I just realized that I have always been honest to him. I can't help but become as transparent as water when it comes to him. Its like he can see right through me.

"Good, now open the door." He said with a chuckle. I cut the call as I run towards my mirror to fix myself.

He could have at least told me that he was coming!

I rummage through my room and try to look decent, unlike the monster I looked some minutes ago. I ran towards the door and Cath raised an eyebrow as she and Nathan watched the TV.

"She's got it bad" she whispered to Nathan, who laughed.

"I heard that!" I rolled my eyes as I opened the door.

Takumi stands at my doorstep with a smile playing on his lips. He's wearing a leather jacket and denims, that's the most casual thing I have ever seen him wear. I take a moment to just see him and take his appearance in. I could never forget how handsome he looked with his hair a wild mess. He pulls me by the wrist and kissed me.

I am spellbound.

"Come, I'm taking you out."

Say what?

"Wh? B-But I—I…?" I look at him dumbfounded, he smirks, "You look more than fine, trust me."

"O—Okay..But my phone"

"You won't need it."

"Okay."

Takumi drove us to a place unknown, he wouldn't tell me where he was taking me but he had me the moment he pulled out ice cream. It wasn't a super expensive date at some five star restaurant and I couldn't be more glad. I didn't know he had such a sweet side to him. All I have seen is either a hard working CEO or a passionate man who is really good in bed. This sweet side to him is very foreign to me.

It turns out, he took us to a huge stadium and we weren't even stopped by the security. I laid down in the soft grass and looked up at the huge sky full of stars.

"I'm surprised that they didn't even stop us from entering this place, and nobody yelled when we stepped on the grass!" I said gleefully when we ate our ice cream. Takumi smirked, "That's because I own this stadium."

Shut the fuck up!

"Seriously?" I said as I sat up and looked at him strangely "You own this?"

"Mhm" He nodded as he ate his ice cream.

"Why?"

"I like to play."

"Are you saying that you're an athletic person?! I just don't see it." I told him as I looked at him strangely, I have so much more to know about him.

"Yes, I am a very athletic person, Mia." He said with a smirk, "How can you not see it?" He grins as he pushes me down and hovers over me. "Doesn't my stamina speak volumes about my love for various kinds of sports?"

He is such a double meaning talker—pervert guy sometimes.

"Well," I pretend to clear my throat "okay" I blush. The view is great. I can see his face and the stars. I can't decide which of the two is more beautiful.

He leans over as he places a kiss on my collarbone. I smile as I cup his cheek, he is such a beautiful, perfect man. I envy him sometimes.

He slides his leg along my leg and I can feel the grass underneath my legs. My short skirt does little to cover me from the grass and small grass pinches my skin. I am literally lost in the stars as I look at Takumi.

It's like he's made up of the stars in the universe. I have so much to know about him, and I know so much with every touch. I feel like I am slipping into oblivion with every kiss that he plants on my body. With every touch I see the stars, and I cannot decide if my love for stars or if my love for him is what I feel at the moment.

 _I love you, Takumi…_ I cannot help but mouth these three words as his hands touch me and he kisses me more passionately. He doesn't see me say them and I feel relieved letting my feelings out into the clear sky. Even if they don't reach his ears, it still feels good to confess to my own self.

I wonder what it would feel like, to fully let go and sink into the oblivion. Would it be just like watching the stars from far away? I wonder.

He showed it to me that night.

 ** _—_** ** _x—_**

The Raven castle was awfully quiet today.

Takumi Walker strolled inside the large palace with a bored face. His hands were in his pockets and Cedric followed behind with a few gift bags. The maids opened the main glass doors and bowed in respect, Takumi had ignored them and strolled inside without a care in the world. The atmosphere was dead and the sunlight that peeked through the lavish curtains fell dead on his eyes. He sat down in the living room and took out a cigarette.

"Takumi, it has been a while." Charlotte Walker, who descended down the grand staircase, spoke with a smile on her face. She wore a plain black gown that flowed behind her when she walked. Takumi stood up as he acknowledged her and gave her a formal hug.

"Where is Gerard?" Takumi asked, he wasn't here to chat—it seemed. Charlotte merely smiled as she waved her hands "Gerry, I don't know. He must be somewhere. This castle is huge, I wouldn't know even if I tried to search for him."

Takumi merely accredited her with a lazy smirk "Shouldn't a wife be more aware of her husband's whereabouts?"

"A husband should acknowledge his wife with human emotions," She sighed, "Why did I ever agree to this marriage, I wonder?"

Takumi didn't know what to say, he sat back down on his sofa with his right leg over his left one "Are you unsatisfied?" He waved his arm around to point at the large diamond studded chandeliers and lavish decorations "Doesn't this make you happy? I'd be surprised if you won't agree. You wanted the money and fame, right?"

"I did" Charlotte nodded with a smile, "But I am a woman, Takumi. I want to be satisfied with something more." She said as she walked closer towards Takumi. Her silk robes hung low over her shoulders.

"Are you talking about love?" Takumi laughed as he crushed the cigarette in the ash tray. "Did you want to be wooed?"

Charlotte laughed as she stood between Takumi's legs "Love? I don't believe in such illusions. But I do believe in lust." She smiled as she dropped her robs and sunk down to her knees and looked into his eyes "I want to be lusted for, I want someone to fuck me raw, I don't want to be kept like a flower in a vase." She laughed as she placed her hands on his lap.

"I am your husband's brother." Takumi warned as his tone got serious, he inched closer to her face as he held her chin "I am your brother-in-law."

"And you're someone who is capable of giving me what I want." Charlotte said as she tried to move her hands towards his belt. Her hands roamed on his shirt trying to unbutton them but Takumi had had it from her. He pushed her back and she landed on the adjoining sofa. Takumi stood up and looked at her with a blank stare. "I didn't come here to play."

"Fuck me, Takumi. I'll make it worth your time." Charlotte said as she got up and stood in front of him "Please, I'll do anything you want." She said as she unzipped her dress halfway and pushed Takumi back on the sofa.

"You're surprisingly strong" Takumi smirked.

"Your brother treats me like doll, he wants to keep me in my rooms. Its aggravating and incredibly boring." She confessed as she dropped down on her knees again and dragged her hands along Takumi's legs. He smirked lazily and picked her up. "Now we're talking." Charlotte half moaned as she tried to grind herself against him, but he threw her down on the sofa and threw her silk robes on her face.

"Sorry, you're a huge turn off. I don't like to touch married women."

"Charlotte what the hell?!" Gerard yelled as he walked in. Yes, he had witnessed everything. Takumi chuckled as he crossed his arms and looked at the dramatic scene unfold before his eyes.

"G-Gerry…I-I…" Charlotte got up and crossed her hands to cover up.

"What a shame to the Walker family name you have become, Gerard." Takumi smirked as he recited Gerard's usual line to his face. "If you can't even keep your own woman satisfied, what can you do?"

"You," Gerard glared at Takumi. "I would like to have a talk with you later on, Charlotte."

"I can explain, Gerry!" The said woman sobbed as she hid her face in her palms.

"I was falling in love with you." Gerard confessed as he looked at her, "But I was wrong to think that you reciprocated my feelings."

"Gerard…I…I'm so sorry"

"What brings you here, Takumi?" Gerard spoke in a serious tone as he ignored the woman weeping before his eyes.

"Don't mind me." Takumi smirked "Today is a great day. The day you got proved wrong."

"What do you mean?" Gerard said, as he took out a cigarette.

"Didn't you so gracefully say that an arranged marriage with someone worthy lasts longer? Didn't you say that love was bullshit?" Takumi laughed in his face as he ran a hand through his hair "Its funny to watch you fall into the same rabbit hole from which you tried to save me."

"Shut up you filth." Gerard glared, "I did what was best for you. You should be grateful."

"But weren't you the ideal one, brother?" Takumi chuckled as he walked closer "You married to the woman who was the most suitable for you, someone who would aid you politically; someone you didn't love. Someone who had the same power as you, then why do I see a failed, unsuccessful marriage?"

"Do not interfere with my affairs."

"Then why did you interfere with mine?" Takumi tilted his neck and looked at him. Gerard was now speechless. Charlotte looked at the two with widened eyes as she had no clues about what the two were talking about. There was pin drop silence in the large hall.

Takumi's laughter echoed through the large halls as he looked at his brother "She was begging me to fuck her. Raw and senseless."

"You stop talking now!" Gerard's blood boiled as he aimed a punch in Takumi's direction. This seemed to have set him off somehow.

"What happened? Did my words pinch you?" Takumi laughed as he caught his fist and looked at him, "You should thank me for not giving your wife what she wanted."

"I am going to kill you" Gerard glared "I should have done this a long time ago."

"Go ahead" Takumi extended his arms as he smiled "Kill me, Gerard."

"Gerard no!" Charlotte ran towards her husband as he took out his gun and hugged him from behind "Don't do this!" She sobbed into his back and Gerard froze.

"Tell me, does it hurt? Watching the love of your life be in pain?" Takumi asked with a silent low tone. His voice was low, all hints of laughter and amusement gone from his tone. Charlotte sobbed as she held on to Gerard tightly and cried. Gerard put his gun down with shaking hands as memories from the past came back. Back when he was ruthless, and didn't know what love was.

Gerard looked at Takumi with wide eyes, he had been so jealous of this little boy back then—since the day he was brought inside the Raven castle. He had hated him. Why? Because he was a child who was made out of love, unlike him—who was the result of a loveless, political marriage. Even though Takumi had no parents, Gerard has always thought that he was more privileged. Gerard, on the other hand, was always bound in rules, for he had to be the next heir to the Walker fortune. He was trained since he was a child. Was he jealous of Takumi? Yes. He had always loathed his freedom.

He had been livid with rage when he found about his life threatening illness. He was always trained to be the heir and now, all that was snatched away from him and placed over Takumi's head. He had worked out hard all his life, only to give it all away.

So he decided to make his life a living hell.

At first, he had only wanted to make Takumi alone. So he forbade him from making any friends or acquaintances. But he had lost it when he found about that Ayuzawa girl. He would never let him fall in love with a Japanese commoner like his own mother. He didn't want to bring shame to the Walker name.

Maybe he didn't want Takumi to the happiness that he could never get.

But things changed, Gerard's plan to isolate had worked. Takumi was made heir, much to his displeasure. Gerard got married, and just like his father, it had been a political marriage.

But Charlotte changed him. Even his illness was gone.

For the first time in his life, Gerard had cared for someone other than himself. He had learned to be passionate and affectionate. He treated her with the utmost love and respect.

Maybe he even realized what Takumi had felt when he fell in love with that girl from the shabby high school.

Gerard blinked back as his eyes got filled with remorse, guilty and unshed tears. Takumi looked at Gerard strangely as he tilted his head. Charlotte's sobs filled the hall and Gerard threw the gun and ran a hand through his hair.

What has he done? To himself, to charlotte.

To Takumi?

He walked towards Takumi as he extended his hand. Where has that twenty one year old, bright, and passionate boy gone?

 _Did I kill him?_ Gerard wondered with a smile as he touched Takumi's forehead, a tear fell down from his face as his mother's face came in his mind as he pushed back Takumi's blond hair.

He had the same hair and eyes as their mother.

Takumi held Gerard by the collars "Do you expect me to cry like a child?" He laughed as he pushed Gerard against the wall and held him high by the neck. "I didn't come here to bond, brother. Just sign the damn papers and I'll be on my way." Takumi said as his tone turned sour and he let Gerard down.

Gerard stared blankly at the man in front of his eyes as he fell down, Charlotte ran towards him and rubbed his back. But Gerard didn't notice as a question repeated in his mind.

 _What monster have I made out of him?_

—x—x—

 **||READ||REVIEW||FAVORITE||FOLLOW||**

 **Author's babbling segment:**

Hey guys! I'm here with the new update. How was it? Did you like it? Hate it? Smile halfway and almost cried like me?

Damn, this chapter had some serious feels in the end.

 **I am going to address all the hate directed towards Mia Kirei now:** first of all *laughs like a crazy woman* you guys! Don't you realize that it is absolutely normal for Mia to be smitten by Takumi? Here's why:

She has no idea about Takumi's past.

She has no idea that someone with the name Misaki Ayuzawa even exists yet.

That's it.

LOL, maybe we can expect some changes in her behaviour when she finds out about Misaki.

 **Mia heads to Japan:** I think this might be exciting, who knows (except the author xD) what will happen in Japan? I think that's where she'll find about Misaki.

 **Gerard finds…redemption?** Yes, even Gerard is human and maybe now he was able to understand what Takumi's love was for Misaki in the past. He feels bad about it but does he understand the damage he has done? To Takumi and To Misaki as well? I'm going to look deep into that later.

 **Mia admits to falling in love with Takumi:** I think this is seriously going to turn out toxic for her. But I also think that this happens with a lot of us. We fall for someone without knowing about them. Hell, the only reason we fall for a person is because we only see our perceived versions of that person's personality. We only see their perfections. BUT I also believe that true love is when a person stays after they see through the cracks in their perfectness.

 **Charlotte tries to seduce Takumi?** Oh god, royal families are fucked up. Seriously, she just jumped him! How could she! She broke poor Gerry's heart. Will they be able to mend their marriage?

I know what y'all are thinking, why am I talking as if I am just a reader. I am the one who wrote this and did that emotional shit to you.

But really, I experience the same when I give it a read. As I always say, the story flows out on its own and the characters come alive. (:

 **Reviews:**

 **AroggantIgnorant045** **chapter 6 . Dec 8**

 **IT'S FINALLY GETTING SOMEWHERE OHMIGOSH**

I know right, it's finally getting somewhere XD

 **Candy2045** **chapter 6 . Dec 8**

 **U r right i feel bad for takumi even more in this chap and love u too...  
Update soon...:)**

Hey there, sorry but this story these days is going like you'll feel worse about Takumi with every new update. Sorry for doing that to you!

 **Minniemiss123** **chapter 6 . Dec 8**

 **Hi...welcome back:))) hope u had great exams.  
I m sooooo happy that u r not angry with me. It's is such a relief! I can't even define it to u!  
And about the story...I still hate Mia...I mean I know that it is takumisa fic and all but I just can't help but hateven her for thinking and acting as if takumi is her! I mean she know that how it would end but look at her...still trying to win him and doing all that things! I m furious at her. And at takumi too! I mean I know that he have become some kinda player but still! He have never behaved so nicely with other...ummmm u know girls. Then y with Mia?! You give her any type of hope?! ughhh. Have he never thought wt misaki would react if she were to ever see him like this? Won't he know that she would be mad at play8ng with other people's feeling? Don't he?  
Anyways, And about the flashback...I don't really want to talk about it...it is just too painful to do so...I mean if it would have continued then I would have definitely cried.! Though I did have butterflies not my stomach. My heart was beating furiously... .that bastards gerard have some nerves to do wt he did...Though I wonder where is misaki now or wt happened to her after all that...? What will happen next?  
Please misskeiri I wish that misaki enters soon please. It is really killing me! _. And update ASAP.  
And gud luck for ur last exam. M glad that u found time to update fromance ur busy schedule. Thank u for that:))**

Hey Minnie, I always love seeing your review on my stories, It has become like a habit. And NO I AM NOT ANGRY AT U, cut yourself some slack. Geez.

I know you hate Mia, but she has no clue about Takumi's past or about Misa, so she's bound to behave like that.

I'm sorry for making you cry, don't know how you felt about this update.

Gosh! This story is getting darker and darker everyday.

Don't worry, I'll try to bring back Misaki soon.

And Thanks for the good luck wishes :D It went really well.

 **Guest** **chapter 6 . Dec 8**

 **Takumisa Takumisa Takumisa Takumisa! No Mia ..No Mia No Mia...after that story...Misaki is still in love with him..I'm 100% sure...Takumisa please...please please update quick**

Gosh! HHAAHAH I get the message, okay okay okay!

 **titaniascarlet4444** **chapter 6 . Dec 8**

 **Well well! Miss Kirei Uchiha! What shall I say..congratulations my two fav fanfics both written by you..Well you see I was lazy to login but I assure you I always freaking read this story chapter 3 last part...misaki's face comes forcefully..still forcefully in love with her.. Missy..I swear youre the one co trolling my life with this story..You have no freakady fuckady idea what your story does to me..Mia Mia Mia ..As shes a good girl...I just can't imagine Takumi with some other girl and Misaki with some other man...That flashback part though.. Damn..I cried.I'm not kidding..I actually fucking cried..damn ..when the fuck is Misaki going to make her appearance.. Missy...please please please PLLLLLEEEEAASSSSEEE UPDATE QUICK...This story is going to be the end of me..I love this and Ups and Downs..damn I sincerely sincerely hope Takumi is gonna end up with Misaki... much as I like you and I can see you're falling in love with Takumii..sorry Takumi is gonna be with the one he was meant for Misaki...update update UPDATTEE PLEASSSSSEEE...I love you Miss Kirei Uchiha..I seriously do...please TAKUMISAAA..TAKUMISAAA...TAKUMISAAA...takumisaaa...update quick please :'(**

Damn girl, hello there. I am honoured to be in your favourite list. Such reviews are best *teary eyes*

Gosh! Don't cry, I feel like consoling everyone by hugs and cupcakes everytime I read the reviews of this particular story.

Thank you thank you thank you!

 **Guest** **chapter 1 . Dec 8**

 **Mediocre/10**

Okay, thanks for the mediocrity.

 **Vijju123** **chapter 6 . Dec 8**

 **Oh gosh...the intensity...I really don't have much to say. DARK.**

SEE?! I told you it was intense! I'm glad you gave it a try, Thank you!

 **Samara16** **chapter 6 . Dec 8**

 **Hi, I read this story in one go. It was a ride of mixed emotions. The last chapter was hard to read. I almost cried. Your description of every scene is just amazing. You make each and every scene real for your readers which is a really good thing.  
From the starting of the story Mia really had a great influence in the story or I rather say she's kind of the main protagonist in the story. Not that it's bad. People hated her. But I can't bring myself hating her because I think at the end she'll be the one who'll suffer most. Will she be the one who'll reunite takumisa?  
While reading I felt that some how Takumi and Mia both are quiet similar with Christian and Ana from 50 shades of Grey.  
I really felt bad for Takumi. He really went through a lot. It's realistic for him to be so fucked up. But I hope he finds his sunshine soon.  
Your this story is really different in a good way of course. It's different from other stories in this archive. I guess at the end of the story Mia can be the Cupid between takumisa and if that happens I'll say her love for Takumi is greater then anything else. Even from takumisa's love for each other. Though I won't deny that I didn't like her character at first but I dont hate her and I think you've planned something good from her character.  
Anyway update the next chapter soon. Best wishe for you. :)**

Hey there Samara! I'm glad you're liking the story so far. Its natural for you to hate Mia…Wait, wha? You don't hate Mia?! WOW, that's an achievement for me! Thanks a lot!

 **BluberryRose** **chapter 6 . Dec 9**

 **Ba BAM! AAAANDDD KIREI IS BACK!  
Wohooo! Yay. This chapter was just so amazing. Not surprised. Rose, I'm not gonna lie, this story wasn't my favorite the first time I read it. But as it progressed along, I can now safely say I really really really like this story. It makes my heart clench in such weird ways. Like this chapter, for instance. :) Just reading this made me so depressed yet satisfied.  
IF I MADE WEIRD FACES OF DEPRESSION DURING BREAK-TIME AT SEPHORA, I WILL KILL YOU. I SWEAR. XD  
I know you've heard this a lot of times, but I really don't like Mia. For real. I also know you know this. It's just something about her. The word is on my tongue. I just know that this slutty jackass of a hoe does not deserve to be with our aline. I wanted to break my phone's screen when I read this chap. WTF. (Not cursing you sweetie, just putting a dumb bitch to her place *cough* *mia* *cough* XD)  
Other than that... Congrats on slowly breaking my heart, one tiny piece at a time :) You've done well. I am totally looking forward to an update. (Hmmm... Am i a masochist? Nah. I'm just excited to see what you have in store.)  
Shit, this review was long XD  
GREAT JOB AS ALWAYS! LOVE YA! MWUAH!  
Kisses and roses from Kyra**

Kyra! My girl! How you doin'?!

And Wow, thanks for all that love and support there! I know you won't make faces at Sephora, I trust you!

IKR why why why ? Why Mia? Right? You'll see XD Don't worry, Misaki will come soon. *pats back* shhh…calm down girlllll!

LOVE YOU A LOT.

 **Takumisa17** **chapter 6 . Dec 9**

 **Amazone ! Update as soon as possible please!**

Thank you!

 **Stella** **chapter 6 . Dec 9**

 **God! Why Taku sweetie's life so complicated. I'm dying from depression. If I die it'll be your fault. Before I die , I wanna say my last wish .And my last wish is I want Misaki's breathtaking entry ! God is their someone who will fulfill my last wish? ( I prefer MissKireiUchiha is to fulfill it ). And I also found Takumi is more like Grey.  
If someone ( MissKireiUchiha ) wants me to stay alive , she has to post the next chapters soon.**

OH GOSH

NONONONONONONO Don't die! Don't say bad things! *shushes* don't worry, I will fulfil your wishes (:

 **violet167** **chapter 6 . Dec 10**

 **You will be the death of us all. I get a little heart ache in my chest whenever I read your stories lol  
to the point I touch my chest and say "I can't breathe...it hurts" XD**

Damn it, I feel like a demon XD… I'm really sorry for the pain *panics, doesn't know what to do*

 **Lady Stradivari** **chapter 6 . Dec 11**

 **Good to see that you updated, Miss K! And to think when you still had an exam the next day. XD Thank you for taking the time of day to write this, though in the end, studies come in first. Well then! On with this chapter.  
Whoa, whoa. WTF. That warehouse scene was dramatic in every way possible, though I can't help but feel a bit irritated over the course of the events, mostly because of Gerard. It's probably because he exhausted all means necessary to separate Takumi from Misaki, and I see his point regarding how he doesn't want his brother to end in the same situation as his mother. (Does this follow canon?) Though I wasn't expecting Takumi to be as helpless as he is here... I was thinking that perhaps Gerard's bold act would make Takumi leave the Walker family for good, because it's Gerard who's asking so much from Takumi, and the least that he could've done was give Takumi a part of his old life. But for him to do this... well, he's become a tad bit greedy and ungrateful, and he has totally forgotten his place in Takumi's life. But amidst all this, Takumi still agreed to break up with Misaki, so I guess he's lucky that his brother was very yielding. But really... Takumi should know that he had the upper hand here, and he easily bent to Gerard. Anyway, Takumi shouldn't blame himself for what happened to Misaki- in the end, this was all planned out AND executed by Gerard. Granted that Takumi had the power to make a difference, but how can he be so sure that Gerard would follow through with that? After all, he just saw what Gerard's capable of doing. Aside from the reason he had stated, I feel as if Gerard had another reason for separating the two, apart from how he didn't want his brother to end up like his mother. Marriage prospects? The Walker family's reputation?  
As for Mia, well... I'm also irritated with her. Not because I ship TakuMisa, but because she is totally acting like they are a thing now. (I'm sorry, girl, but take a hint; he's not that into you.) But I'm still holding onto the idea that she's going to be his saving grace. Nevertheless, I'm open to surprises, so take it away from here, Miss K.**

 **Hmm, I feel like Misaki's entrance is around the corner. Looking forward to that.  
Overall, I'm pleased with this chapter. Having read Takumi's backstory, I understand why he's acting the way he is, but that doesn't give him the excuse to be the man that he is right now. He could've dealt with the situation more maturely. Right now, he's just a man who's wallowing in self-pity. Imo, he still allowed it all to happen, though I have to take into consideration his overbearing brother, his family's reputation, and his mindset-that he thought this was the best way for him to solve his problems. But he is still heading down a dark road, so Takumi, I'm not siding with you on this one. I do feel sorry for you, but if you had thought that your separation from Misaki will ensure the stability that presumably comes along with it, shouldn't you at least be okay with that? That your separation wasn't all in vain? In reality, it's all about giving and taking. The good comes with the bad; and the bad comes with the good.  
OK WOW THIS MUST BE MY LONGEST REVIEW YET FOR MFUH OMG NO WTF I told myself to reduce my word count but I guess I just have so much feelings for your story that I just had to let it all out. Love your work. Love how it makes me think and feel so much. Will be patiently waiting for the next chapter.  
\- LS**

#DRUMROLL

Here comes my favourite reviewer.

Thank you for giving me the time of the day by writing such a nice review! I don't know whether I should be happy I make you all type so much for the reviews or not. BUT they do make my day, SO thank you! I wonder how many emotions I will pull out with this update (: Keep reviewing, they really help me. ILY.

 **tatzecom** **chapter 6 . Dec 13**

 **aaaaah, bruh, I cant even! You did it, I am out of words... I think I have to reread the entire Story (lost memory of the actual beginning and I think the Second Chapter) but I read the 6 patiently and woah, dude, ma'm, bruh... I am littery sobbing on the Floor of the Bus I am driving in, because this Story is so -intense... You did a great job to weaken Takumi.  
"He gave up. He drowned in the darkness"  
aaaaaand I am crying a Little Bit... never happened before so yeah, also i sais nothing with this Review about the Story, still loving it :D keep up the good work, because this is the stuff a Dark MaidSama spinoff would be Made of (ignore the fancy upper/lower case mistakes and the typos, because german Guy trying to write Englisch on his Phone which autocorrects everything if not asked otherwise -.-)**

Hey there *tries to brofist, fails miserably* your review broke my heart. Don't cry. *sends wipes and some pizza* Thank you so much for the heartfelt review! I was almost in tears when I read " **this is the stuff a Dark MaidSama spinoff would be Made of** " Damn, you really thought so?! DO you know how happy that me!? Thank you so much!

x—x—x—x

 _Whoah, whoah WOAH_

 _Sorry for such a long babbling segment. I could not contain myself. Forgive your poor author. Its 1:40AM right now. Geez. I love the reviews I get on this story so keep rolling those in! MUCH LOVE. See y'all soon (: Don't forget to comment upon the title of the chapter._

 _BTW, I won't quote the reviews from the next time cuz they make the chapter very long. I only put them because then the reviewer could remember what they wrote. BUT I don't want it to be a nuisance for the readers, so yeah._

 _CIAO~!_


	8. Chapter 8

_—_ _xx—_

 **My Fucked Up Heart**

 **Chapter 7: "His True Self"**

 **MIA KIREI**

"There is something that I want to tell you…" I said as my lips quivered due to the cold. It was raining again and the silence made the sound of rain drops falling down echo through the room. Takumi raised an eyebrow as he placed his cup down and looked at me. That sure managed to catch his attention, didn't it?

I traced the rim of my cup as I contemplatively stared blankly at it. How should I voice my thoughts? This is something that has been on my mind for the last two days ever since I realized the seriousness of my attraction and infatuation towards Takumi Walker. That's right, after all this time—I've been in love with him. Although he does treat me kindly, I do not know about the depth of his feelings towards me.

"Is something bothering you?" He says nonchalantly in a very carefree tone as he crosses his arms and looks at me intently. I can't help but shiver—its too cold today and the fact that I feel nervous as hell is another story.

"I've been wondering about the nature of our relationship." There—I said it. I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I feel much better now, so I continue, "It's been on my mind for quite a while now."

Takumi looks at me for a moment, his face and expressions are unreadable. I don't know what's going on in his mind, but I will hopefully know soon. "What about it?"

"W-Well…" I cup the coffee mug in my hands, since the warmth it imparts feels comforting. "I want to know what our relationship means to you. What I mean to you. B-Because I'm very clear about how I feel about you n-now. Takumi. I just…" I can't help but feel warm all over as I see him looking at me with a serious face. The sound of raindrops falling is more vivid, the wind is humming along making me feel a chill down my spine.

"I-I…" The words are stuck in my throat as I try to form a sentence in my mind. His face remains blank and I feel so clueless about everything. I feel desperate now.

"I think I—I'm in l-love with..."

"We'll talk about this when you return back from Japan." He says with an absolute voice, leaving no room for argument. I stand up from my spot out of nervousness and slam my hands on the glass table.

"B-but at least listen to me!"

He seems so unfazed by this all as he just takes out his handkerchief and uses it. I stare at him like a stupid girl. Why does the atmosphere seem so dull all of a sudden? We were having a nice time chatting in the balcony. It was evening time and I was about to leave but it had started to rain, Takumi had made me stay and asked his housekeeper to make coffee. I was enjoying my time with him, but why does he seem so distant all of a sudden? Why can't he talk about this right now?

I feel angry all of a sudden, there are unshed tears in my eyes and I cannot help but feel so annoyed by the turn of events. He looks at me and I can't help but feel like he's in a sour mood.

"Can't you even listen to what I have to say?" I say and my voice was so close to breaking; he stands up, "Don't make yourself worry with unnecessary things, Mia. We can have a talk about this when you're back. It's getting late and I don't want you to be tired for your flight tomorrow."

He shuts me down with a logical explanation and I can't help but feel so…strange. So distant. Why does he want to wait till I come back? I don't understand, but maybe; maybe he's right. Maybe this time away will give me a chance to think things through before I voice them out properly.

"How can you be so cold without even listening to what I have to say?" I ask quietly, he stands up and takes a few steps towards me.

"I think I know what this is about, and I believe this isn't the right time to be talking about it." He says as he plants a kiss on me. "You have a lot to do tomorrow. Don't over work your heart and brain."

He leaves me speechless. Does he have commitment issues? With this encounter I feel like I barely know him. I feel like I only managed to scratch the surface of his heart. Or rather, do I know him at all? I move his hand away and pick up my bag. "I'll be taking my leave then." I pulled myself away from him and walked away into the clear sky. It was still raining but I felt like I should really leave. I feel light headed, as if I don't understand the workings of the mind and heart.

I walked away from him, since I had to be home soon. Tomorrow is my flight to Tokyo, Japan. I felt like seeing Takumi today and I did. There's no reason for me to lengthen my stay. I can't hear the sound of my footsteps due to the pitter-patter of the rain but I can hear the beat of my heart thrumming angrily against my ribs. As I walked away from Takumi Walker, I couldn't help but wish that he'd follow me. That he'd stop me. That he'd say something.

But he didn't.

How characteristic of him.

"Cedric, go with her." I heard him say as he turned around and left saying how he had work to do. I don't understand, do I?

For the first time, I question myself.

How much do I know Takumi? Or, do I know him at all?

-x-

 **Tokyo, Japan.**

"The weather feels so refreshing!" Aaron remarked as soon as the team landed in Japan. The members comprised of Mia—who seemed like she was in her own world, Aaron—who was complementing the tropical weather, Satomi—who was originally from Japan and was happy to be back to her roots and a weird middle aged man who went by the name of Ian, who looked like he was about to get to work.

"I agree" Satomi remarked as they got into the SUV that was sent from Walker Corp. Mia followed without a word and the four headed towards the flat they were going to be staying in.

"Mia, you seem to be a little off." Ian, who was nested in his laptop, spoke. Mia, who was looking out, turned around and snapped out, "I'm great! Just tired."

"She's so bubbly and cheerful otherwise." Satomi said, Aaron nodded "I agree, this is the first time I'm seeing her so quiet too."

"Geez stop bullying me guys!" Mia said as she ran her hands in her hair exasperatedly. "Honestly! What's with you guys!"

"Ara, the original Mia is back guys" Aaron laughed "Don't forget that we're your seniors."

"S-Sorry."

"Well, as for your punishment—lets call you by your real name and it'd be fitting since we're in Japan!" Ian said as he adjusted his glasses.

"Yea, Kirei-chan!" Satomi laughed as she patted her back, Mia sighed as she admitted defeat, "Can't be helped I guess."

The guest house was beautiful. Even though the exterior looked pretty modern, its interior was designed according to the traditional Japanese style so that the people who stayed could enjoy their visit to the fullest. Work started tomorrow and the team was given the day off to settle down and sleep the tiredness off.

Mia stared at her smartphone blankly before turning if off. The people around her raised an eyebrow but when she returned to her cheerful self, nobody asked a question.

The next day, everyone was ready to head out. The Walker Corp was located at a very nice location with greenery all around. The sun shone brightly unlike the bland England when the sun only came out rarely.

"The headquarters in Japan is looked after the least. Its sales have dropped as compared to the last year, the management is in shambles, and the human resource department is a joke." Satomi said in a whisper as they read the reports. "The CEO completely disregards this HQ even though he was the only who had initially opened one in Japan for targeting the Asian market. I wonder why?"

Ian clinked his glasses as he skimmed through another text document, "And he doesn't even want to visit here. Why? Anyway, the board of directors were behind the idea of sending us here to look closely into the situation. This project duration may even be increased if we're not able to restore this HQ up to the mark."

I wonder why too? Mia thought as she read her own copy of the document. Why would Takumi disregard the HQ if he was the one who had originally installed it? It just didn't make sense. She knew Takumi wasn't one to completely disregard the corporation. "Must be another reason, perhaps?" she said out loud without giving it much thought. Everyone turned their heads, "Well, well, nobody seems to know that." Aaron spoke next.

"Let's leave it at that and look at the other documents before we head out for the tour of the office, shall we?" Satomi spoke and they all nodded.

Mia was the youngest on the team, so she nodded and followed what everyone else did. This was a big opportunity to learn, and she was determined to do her best. She noted down the instructions she was given and began to work diligently.

"Mia-Mia" Satomi sang at lunch hour as she closed Mia's laptop, "Work can wait, lets get to lunch soon."

"Thank you for treating me so kindly." She spoke at the cafeteria. They clinked juice glasses and everyone had a great time.

The tour of the office had been fun, they noted that even though the headquarter wasn't quite looked after, the facilities were up to date even though they was no one there to make use of them. The workers seemed to be laid back and lazy, but it was just because of poor management.

"We have a lot of points to work upon." Ian sighed as he finished his report. Mia handed him a cup of coffee when he finished. "The authorities are laid back since they have nobody to answer to; but if this keeps up we'll have to shut this branch down, that would lead to a lot of loss in the overall turnover."

"Mia"

"Yes?"

"You'll be doing a lot of research. We'll have you observe and keep an eye at everything while we are here. Do it in a way that nobody suspects you. Your task will be to observe closely and to find out the flaws in the departments, once we know the main problems, we can start to work on them. There are a few things that we won't be told by the authorities since they won't want us meddling with their work and enjoyment, which is why we'll have you carry this out." Satomi said.

"I'll be a spy?" Mia tilted her head, was this a joke?

"Haha! You could say that, but yeah. We want you to look closely in a way we can't—with our designation and reputations. But you can. So, we're counting on you!"

"Was that an insult?" Mia murmured awkwardly as she nodded, everyone laughed. "Do your best, Kirei-san!" the three sang and Mia wondered if they were serious or just plain high in the middle of the day.

"Yes, yes." She nodded with a sigh, what all would she have to go through?!

 **London, England.**

"I'm not going."

Complete silence followed as Gerard sighed, he placed the papers down on the glass table with a sigh. Takumi stared out of the window with a blank expression on his face.

"The board is furious with you, they're not wrong either—if you were the one to open that branch, you should look after it too!" Gerard's voice rose unlike his usual composed face. He slammed his hand on the table as he took out a cigarette.

"I'm not going." Takumi said again, as he went back to his chair and opened his laptop to work.

"Are you a coward?" Gerard laughed as he tapped the cigarette ash on to the ashtray. Takumi looked up and stared at him with a smirk "I'm a coward?"

"'Course you are, I know why you're so unwilling to return to Japan. You're hiding—from _her"_ Gerard said as he tried to search for any emotion that he could find on his face, something…something that would say that there's hope left. At this point, Gerard was more than desperate for a reaction.

But, he didn't say anything.

"I neither have the time nor the energy, Gerard. I have a company to run—one that was so graciously given to me, by _you_." Takumi smirked as he got back to work, leaving Gerard speechless.

Okay, he did get a reaction, but not one what he was hoping for. He knew that Takumi would never leave any chance to remind him of all the bad things he had done—that was just the type of person he had become.

Or, the type of person he pretended to be.

Gerard smiled to himself with an evil glint in his eyes. Maybe he would have to use other tactics after all, he never thought he'd be going back to his evil ways, but this would surely be the last time. He got up to leave, the gods were going to hate him for this.

Takumi stared out of the window with a blank expression on his face. It was true that he was necessarily avoiding going back to a place that held many memories. Memories that he had safely stored away in a deep dark corner of his heart. He had moved on from everything, from _her_ and he was sure that she had too moved on. He didn't want to risk an encounter with her and scratch old wounds.

Who had the leisure to think? He sighed as he got back to work. Emerald eyes that had once shone from delight were now faded, dark and dull. Was this called maturing? He wondered as he placed his arm on his stiff shoulder. He really wanted to leave everything and hit the gym.

Deciding that he wasn't getting any work done anyway, he shut his laptop off and stood up to leave. What's the use of sitting back and wallowing when its not doing you any good?

Yeah, Takumi, what's the use of thinking about the past and wallowing when its not doing you any good? A _voice_ inside his head snickered as he ran a hand through his hair. He knew that voice was right.

Damn it all, he needed to _forget._

 **Tokyo, Japan.**

Mia picked up another piece of document and started going through it. The management was really in dumps causing the entire staff to be lazy and irresponsible. It seemed that the branch manager was on leave for months since he had no one to answer to. The board was sick of this and now were demanding answers, which is why and how Mia landed in Tokyo with her team superiors consisting of Satomi-san, Aaron and Ian.

They had gone through all the files and documents, had a physical tour of the office and talked to the authorities as well. Everything seemed fine on the outside, but they knew that the inside matter was a completely different story. Research work had begun and now they were digging old records.

"So, this might sound interesting." Satomi said, catching the attention of the other three members as she calmly flipped through the pages of yet another file while sipping her latte.

"What did you find?"

"It seems like something is up with the HR department. Several complaints were filed against us and there were a few cases where the employees had sued for emotional and mental assault? Doesn't that sound strange? There are a lot of letters that have been coming from the court by the HR has managed to dodge them all and ignore. I was lucky to get my hands on this file somehow."

"Where did you get your hands on this file?"

"I hacked into the main server." Ian said as he looked out of the window, "This is just a copy of what I found among other interesting things."

"The people at higher positions seem to be taking advantage of the funds allotted for the projects and harassing the employees by providing them low wages and hereby nuking all the money." Satomi said as she kept the file aside.

"You guys are awesome for figuring out all this in such a short span of time." Mia remarked as she looked at the file Satomi was reading from. Her superiors were truly remarkable, weren't they?

"Yeah, we should be the part of CIA" Ian laughed, causing everyone else to start laughing as well.

"Well Mia, this is where you come in, keep an eye on these people for me. Act normal, like you're just an employee in the firm."

"But I am just an employee" Mia mumbled, Aaron laughed. "No, we're all ninjas! You gotta think like one as well"

"I'll try my best!" Mia said with enthusiasm, she was very lucky to get such friendly superiors.

 **Later that day** ,

Takumi sighed as he took another gulp of the wine he had been drinking. He currently sat in the library present in his house, and flipped the page of the book he had been reading. _This_ —whatever he was doing currently, was the only thing common between the person he was a few years ago and the person he had now become. It had been weeks since he had picked up a nice book with a glass of wine in the cosy warmth of his room. He was pretty laid back today—wearing a plain faded white shirt with the sleeves rolled up. He hadn't even bothered to comb his hair—what would be the point anyway? The always ended up getting messed up and fell on his face.

The week long stubble growing on his cheek could be considered a beard—he didn't feel like shaving either. These days, he didn't feel a lot of things. He didn't feel like going to work, hitting the gym, staying at home or going out, sitting, sleeping, and breathing. He felt fed up of this routine. It was too monotonous for someone who once liked the surprises of life.

He chuckled as he placed the book aside and ran a hand through his hair. He had been stoic before, and he was stoic now—but he had never been as unmotivated as he was right now. He stood up and decided to pick up another book out of the bookshelf which contained the books he had already read many times now, speaking of which, he hadn't even updated his bookshelf—that's how unmotivated he felt.

 _Ah, Lolita…_ Takumi took out yet another familiar book as he decided to lay down on the cold wooden floor and used his left arm as a pillow as he flipped another page.

He had missed this.

He missed being himself.

Even Lolita did him no good, his thoughts went circling back to the demons in his mind. Was this what he had been reduced to? Was he only capable of being his true self in a closed room with books? He closed the book as he sat up in a flash. This had to stop today.

Enough with the denial, he told himself as he opened the door of his room and stepped out. Cedric stood outside, waiting for orders. He stood straight and emotionless, ready to execute any wish that Takumi had—but he wasn't ready for what he saw next.

"Prepare for a one day trip." Takumi had said casually and walked away, Cedric's eyes widened as he saw his figure walking further away towards the sunny outdoors. He wasn't shocked by what Takumi had said, but by the small flicker of a smile that he had seen on his face. This was the closest thing to a smile that Takumi had managed out in months—unintentionally. Cedric looked out at the clear sky as he broke out a smile of his own.

 **The next day,**

"Did you see that?!" Ian almost screamed out as he whispered. Satomi, who had been leisurely taking a sip from her latte, looked up—away from the document she had been reading. "What's wrong?" She asked Ian, who seemed frantic, but had a look in his eyes that told Satomi he'd seen something rather _interesting._

"Come with me." Ian turned around and Satomi stood up to follow.

On the next floor, a large crowd gathering could be seen. The employees looked panicked and some were just there to enjoy the show. Aaron could be seen standing next to the crowd and all of their eyes were glued to the office of the branch manager. The office was transparent due to the fact that the doors were made of glass and the curtains weren't pulled. People watched in fear as a woman sitting inside the office continued to scold the branch manager.

"I'm through with this firm" she said in a very calm tone as she sat on the sofa chair casually with her right leg over the left one. The bald man sitting on the so-called "BOSS" chair wiped his sweat off as his hands shivered.

"We'd like to request one last chance to rectify the matter ourselves before you take any actions." He spoke—rather tried to speak, in a calm manner. The woman sitting in front of him let out a hearty chuckle as she shifted her lower body backwards and her face towards the glass table.

"That's nice," she said as she checked the time on her wrist watch. A man stood behind her with a suitcase—probably a bodyguard or an assistant. "But do you think I came all the way here to have a cup of tea with you, Mr Ike?" Her smile faded away as she slammed her hand on the glass table that shook with the intensity. The bald man—who had been underestimating her because of her pretty face, stood up in fear. "A-Are you threatening me?" he asked as he used a louder voice—trying to subdue the woman using his male ego.

She stood up from the sofa seat, the black formal dress that she wore reached her knees and he made the mistake of staring at her toned legs. "My face is up here, Mr Ike. As far as threatening goes, I don't have to threaten you. You failed to produce the expected results within the given time and wasted my time twice in a row. Now, I am merely doing my duty and I promise you this—I will turn this office into dust. You better start calling up people to save you and this forsaken organization." She turned away, leaving no place for argument. Her assistant followed her as she left and made her way towards the elevator door.

As she passed by the corridors, the people couldn't help but feel like taking another look. Surely, a woman so fierce, so powerful, so bold was one in a billion and they all couldn't help but feel sorry for the people that had tasted her wrath.

"The resemblance…" Satomi trailed as she watched her back as she walked—confidently, and beautifully.

Ian laughed, "Is truly uncanny…"

"But it is only physical" Aaron said with a sigh, "Where is Mia anyway? Did she see her?"

"But, who is she?" Satomi said, her voice was in a daze and everyone else couldn't feel but ask the same question themselves.

 _Who is she?_

 **—** **x—**

 **Author's note:**

Hello there guys! I'm finally back with an update of My fucked up heart. Did you miss me as much as I missed you? I hope so!

I'm glad that this story reached 100 reviews, since it seemed like nobody was going to like it at first. I hope I can make you all satisfied with the coming chapters. Thank you for such huge love and support.

Anyways, getting on with the chapter. What did you guys think? There was not much action in the chapter but now Mia is maybe finally realizing some things that she should have realized sooner. We'll see how it goes from here.

Admittedly, I added the last part to add a spark of excitement. I hope you guys will wait for the next chapter! Sorry, I couldn't reply to the reviews! But, know that I always read them—sometimes repeatedly as they make me happy…


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 8: Warnings**

 **||-MissKirei-||**

The weather in Japan was …good. He had always found it better than England. Even though, the dull skies and rain would suit someone like him more but he couldn't deny that he was fond of the weather in this small country instead. Takumi sat in the windowsill of his room as he watched the dark night turn into a lively day. He had been glued to the windowsill since he had reached, he had even disregarded his work and piled it for 'later' just to sit here and gather his thoughts.

But

His thoughts were nowhere near gathered even though he had been sitting here for the last sixteen hours. Nobody knew that he had landed here, in Japan, except for Gerard, who—had been spying on him straight from England, he knew, so he didn't even feel the need to inform Gerard that he had taken a small _detour_ and abandoned the Mercedes the moment he stepped out of the plane.

He had taken a cheap taxi and decided to head out to some rundown hotel to have some peace of mind instead, but his clothes said otherwise. Takumi was quick to shut the door of the small hotel room and found a comfortable seat on the windowsill. He was as free as he could be right now—alone in a distantly familiar yet so unfamiliar place in Tokyo. He must have passed by these roads during his teen years when he used to leisurely stroll around the town having nothing better to do.

Takumi knew that his phone was seconds away from buzzing, telling him the things he had to do, and the people he had to meet, so he did the good deed of breaking it in half and disposing it into the trash can. He smirked to himself, he half felt like a criminal running from the police. But, the police wouldn't be this fast in tracking him as _Cedric_ was. He had spotted him from the window. Cedric stood in front of the hotel by the car with his hands behind his back. Takumi sighed, that man had trained himself to become a robot.

Upon deciding that it was best to get out and eat something, Takumi finally stood up. He had managed to go twenty four hours without a cigarette or any alcohol whatsoever. He wasn't an addict. But, he had begun to rely on these two things when he internally felt like he couldn't get through the day himself, which happened a lot. He got up and felt a bit dizzy inside, he should've eaten, he thought.

Well, according to him, he should have done a lot of things but with time, he had become oddly flexible with things. His old self would call the new him a coward, but he couldn't come to care.

Takumi opened the door with a hand in his hair, with the palm covering his eye, his vision blurred as the bright light entered the room through the door. He got out without a word, but came back to pick up the blazer that he had left in the room. On second thoughts, he didn't go back and just went down the stairs, it was just a pathetic blazer anyway.

Cedric was standing on the other side of the road with a ghostly smile plastered on his face, as always. Takumi opened the car doors and got inside wordlessly. He placed his elbow on the window and placed his head on his arm as he closed his eyes.

"I want to be free for the duration of my stay in Japan, which means that I won't be requiring your services outside office. Final decision." Takumi said as he sipped wine. Cedric merely nodded and walked away. With that said, he was free to do anything at least outside office, well, not like Cedric could stop him from doing something, but he felt like he'd feel more free if he was left alone. A basket of fruits caught Takumi's attention as he worked on his laptop sitting in the suite, when was the last time he had eaten fruit? He couldn't remember. There was a time he would be aware of every fruit, vegetable or ingredient that was available near him.

He stared at his new phone as Mia's face came flashing back to his mind. Right. She was here too. And he should've called her days ago when she left. But he didn't. Because he was a douche. Takumi smirked as he picked up his phone, he was a douchebag.

He felt a bit better after sending flowers her way, Takumi sighed for the nth time. Since when did he have to rely on materialistic things to woo women? He didn't know. But, they had always liked such things, so he had no problems. Gone was the time when he would go out of his way to do something sweet for the girl he once loved, everything was a phone call away now, even the so-called "love".

 **In Walker Corp, Tokyo.**

Mia stared at the bouquet of colourful flowers sitting at her temporary desk. Who would send her flowers? She stared at the flowers in awe of their beauty and her eyes caught a sparkling crème card that had kept itself hidden inside.

 _"_ _I'm sorry, about my behaviour the other day. I'm in Tokyo. I would like to make amends, meet me in the evening."_

 _T. Walker_

At first, she couldn't believe her eyes, but shock was soon replaced by happiness on her face. What was he doing here in Japan? Didn't he have work to do back home? What did this mean? That he had come here all the way for…her? Her immature heart was filled with anticipation as she put the flowers in a vase. Her face couldn't hide the glow of happiness she was experiencing, she couldn't wait for the evening to come!

Mia, with lifted spirits, felt herself come alive as she worked hard the rest of the day, her co-workers could see it too, although they didn't understand why.

"I'm still not over the fact that Mia has a doppelganger." Aaron had said for the fifth time today when Satomi nodded with a hum, "Mia should have seen that woman though."

"I think you guys are just over reacting, it can't be a 'doppelganger', and there might be some resemblance." Mia remarked as she read through the files of employees.

"She was like your more confident, and scary version, or something." Ian spoke in between work, "She seemed like a woman you don't wanna mess with."

"Then definitely not my doppelganger." Mia laughed.

"There is a surprise inspection going on for the regular employees." Aaron spoke, "We won't be questioned though. But the team is going to come in our office too."

"What team?"

"Oh god, the CEO!?" Satomi screamed under her breath when Takumi opened the glass doors of the office and stepped inside. Everyone was on their feet, and Mia's jaw was open.

"A full report by today evening is expected." Takumi said, his eyes currently found some entertainment of Mia Kirei as he stared blankly in her direction until she started to feel uncomfortable.

"Why are you staring at me?" Mia said with a weird face and everyone couldn't help but stare at her in horror.

"Its been a long time, Miss Kirei." Takumi greeted with a smirk, "I expect you're not giving everyone a hard time."

"Of course." Mia said as she pursed her lips into a thin line.

"Well then I will see you in the evening." Takumi said as he left along with his team members.

"You seemed to be on more than friendly terms with the CEO." Aaron said and everyone nodded, "Fishy terms."

"Nothing like that!" Mia laughed, or pretended to laugh as everyone hmmed along.

"Mia" Satomi called out to Kirei when the official time got over, Mia turned around, "What is it?"

"I need to talk with you, Mia" Satomi said as she put her purse over her shoulder. Mia picked up her folders as the two exited office, "Okay."

"This is going to sound weird, but I rather say it than regret it later." Satomi said as she motioned for Mia to walk, "I am going to start off by saying what I deduced, the truth might be different."

"You can say anything you wish to" Mia urged, what could she want to say?

"I worked as a receptionist for Takumi Walker a few years ago."

Mia stopped dead in her tracks, had she caught on to what was going on between them two?

"And I don't know whether you both are dating or not, but it seems that you like him." Satomi said with a knowing smile.

"I do…"Mia said thoughtfully, she didn't know what their relationship was called though.

"So you should know this as soon as possible. In my days as a receptionist, I had the chance to… witness Takumi closely. And I saw things I shouldn't have seen." Satomi pursed her lips—she was unsure of how to say what she wanted to say, but Mia was a friend and it was important that she got her thoughts out.

"You're just his type."

This, caused a smile to appear on Mia's face, but the seriousness in Satomi's face caused her to let her continue.

"When I say that you're his 'type', I don't mean that you're sweet and pretty. I mean, something else."

"What do you mean?"

Satomi sighed, "He always goes for the same kind of women—raven hair, amber eyes. I've seen some women that he has dated before, they all have the same characteristics—same hair color, height, features. I don't know why but it doesn't feel like a coincidence anymore. Its like he has some strange _preference_."

"W-Well, people have preferences all the time" Mia defended Takumi without a second thought. She didn't understand why Satomi was badmouthing Takumi like that.

"That's not preference, its more like a fetish or something. He never puts any effort for his women. Behind every romantic gesture is actually an order that he threw on Cedric's face. I'm not saying that he doesn't reciprocate their feelings, but it feels like he doesn't care much. I want you to be protected from that. When I first saw you, I knew inside that if he were single, you'd be the one."

Mia kept silent the whole time Satomi spoke. She couldn't help but disagree to everything Satomi said, but deep down inside she had fear in her heart. Fear that what Satomi said was true.

"I'm not saying that he doesn't love you, I'm saying that if you were to leave, there's a good chance he won't be affected by it. I've seen Takumi Walker in action, it takes him a good wine bottle to get over a relationship, but the girls he breaks up with are left for Cedric to handle. That man leads a perfect life, Mia. A life which is much different than yours or mine." Satomi smiled apologetically, "I'm sorry but I'm just looking out for you."

"I'm fine, Satomi-san. Really, me and Takumi… we're fine." Mia said with a smile. Her immature self could not understand the words that Satomi spoke, she was blinded by love after all.

"Oh you're a naïve girl, Mia." Satomi shook her head disappointedly as Mia walked away with a bright smile, "But I'm scared for you. I hope your smile and personality never changes."

 **Later that evening,**

"So why did you call me here?" Mia asked, sitting on the opposite side of the table of a sushi restaurant. Takumi looked at her with an amused expression on his face, "Why Miss Kirei, aren't you happy to see me in Japan?"

"The last time, you weren't happy to see me."

"I'm always happy to see you."

"You don't even smile!"

Takumi smirked as he picked up the rose lying in a vase at the centre of the table, he used it to poke Mia's face, who became flustered as soon as the petal touched her cheek.

"I'm not going to just smile and do everything you want from now on." Mia said with a serious face as they ate, Takumi raised an eyebrow, "I believe I can make you do anything I wish." He said as he winked in her direction, and this was the merriest Mia had ever seen him! She controlled her smile and just made a face.

"I'll show you something as soon as we finish dinner." Takumi said randomly while eating, Mia looked up as she placed her chopsticks on the side. "What?"

"Wouldn't be fun if I told you." Takumi said.

A few hours later, the duo drove away in Takumi's car. He drove while Mia sat on the other side, quietly staring at him. He looked at peace when he drove, she decided. They passed by the city buildings and the crowded areas and reached the quietest part of Tokyo. It seemed to be more on the outskirts of Tokyo, the vehicles on roads were scant and the neighbourhood was silent. Takumi pulled inside the driveway of a mansion and the two stepped out into the open.

The mansion stood in the middle with a driveway leading up to it. There were gardens on the either way and one even had a cherry blossom tree. Mia looked around in awe as the wind blew softly, "Is this your house?" she asked.

"I bought this years ago, before I was made CEO back in England." Takumi said, he didn't add more to the sentence even though he probably wanted to tell her that he was a different person back then.

"You didn't visit since?"

"Nope, but I made sure that this place was taken care of." Takumi said, he had given the keys to an unlikely high school friend, Kanou Soutaro, who had been having troubles finding a place to live. Takumi had given him a place to live without rent on condition that he took care of it while he was away. This house was supposed to be a gift for Misaki when they would move in together. Sadly, that day never came. He was probably going to sell this place or just give it away now.

"Well, this house is beautiful. I can imagine you living here."

"I could too." Takumi said without much thought, "Let's get inside."

"What?" Mia wondered what he meant. She followed him as he opened the doors and showed her around. The mansion was as beautiful on the inside as it was on the outside. Even though Takumi hadn't lived here for a single day, the entire house was packed with supplies.

"I'm going to stay here until I'm in Japan." Takumi said without much thought, Mia nodded with a smile as she walked in the corridors and stopped as she reached one door that seemed to be locked.

"What's in there?" She asked as she tried to twist the doorknob, which didn't open.

"Nothing special. Whatever happens, do not open that door even if I'm here or not." Takumi said in all seriousness, leaving Mia no option but to nod along. She got really interested in that mysterious room now. The room was the largest room in the corridor and the air of mystery around it caused Mia to think about it more than she should have. Takumi, on the other hand, didn't face the door for a single second, and walked away as if nothing happened.

"What now?" Mia asked as she sat on the sofa in the large living room. Takumi sat down next to her with a cup of coffee in his hand as he sipped it without a word.

"You are so uptight." Mia said with a sigh as Takumi continued to sip the coffee sitting straight. He looked at her with a raised eyebrow as he set the cup on the table. He turned to her with a smirk, "You don't like uptight men?"

"I hate uptight men." Mia laughed as she put an arm around Takumi's neck and loosened his tie. In all fairness, he looked hot with his tie undone, he merely made a face as he held her hands "All English men are uptight."

"I like the Japanese more." Mia winked, "Senpai."

"Me too, Me too." Takumi smirked as he planted a kiss on her with ended up becoming another one of those infamous make out sessions. Mia sighed as Takumi put her down on the sofa seat and took her, why did things always end this way? Why wasn't she capable of defying him? She knew she was too deep into her feelings to care what Satomi said or what Cedric told her or whatever. What mattered to her, was him…

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	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 9: All dreams are shattered**

 **||~MISSKIREI~||**

* * *

 _I'd recommend listening to "Akane, by UxMishi" while reading the start of this chapter. UxMishi had performed this song in the episode 26 of Kaichou Wa Maid-Sama. You can find it on youtube._

* * *

Takumi stared at the LED TV hung on the wall opposite to his desk. The Walker Corporation was really sinking low in Asia. He had been working day and night, trying to improve the position of the company, but with the lazy pace his employees were used to, he doubted the success of his plan. The news channel had been showing the newest ratings and he wasn't very happy with what he had seen. If this kept up, his reputation was sure to turn to dust.

He had something to prove,

To Gerard. And more importantly,

To himself.

Takumi grit his teeth as he stared at the files lying on his desk. He was actually angry today. It had been a long time since he had felt any emotion other than his usual self-loathing. He decided to call up the team that had come from England to look into the matter. It was no use sitting here and frowning, he decided that it would be better to take a progress report from that team instead.

"Send Aaron and his team members to my office." He spoke into the phone as he took off his blazer and unbuttoned his shirt collar.

The news reporter's voice kept getting on his nerves and he decided to change to some random channel instead. Takumi started to put his files together after changing the channel. He had to make room for more files on his desk.

Some random Japanese music band had started to play on the TV as Takumi kept all papers in the right files and shut his laptop.

The music felt awfully familiar though, how long has it been since he had listened to Japanese music? It had been almost 8 to 9 years… He was never one to be fond of pop-rock music anyway, he had never even been to a musical concert except for once when he went to a school festival with Misaki.

Takumi stilled, how long has it been since then? He felt a rush of emotions in his heart as he faced the television set and saw the band performing a very familiar song.

 _The sky is falling madder  
It soon another sad season  
That afternoon  
From the beginning I met you  
Please remember to cut back at that time_

He recognized Kuuga immediately, he had this crazy funky hairstyle now, that made him almost unrecognizable, but Takumi had good memory.

The music brought back memories with it that were so close to his heart, the times when he was so happy. Listening to the same words come out of Kuuga's mouth was like a slap to his face. Takumi smirked as he looked at the band members of UxMishi, they all had matured alright, he still remembered what all had happened in the school festival. It had been the best day of his life.

 _I was just lonely cheating painful_

 _[Love] is now the only weakness_

 _More are about to change with the strength in his chambers in my heart_

 _Finally understand how I feel_

 _Your heart that much again_

 _Dreaming_

 _Snow while walking our separate ways_

He saw Kuuga winking towards a certain pink haired girl. What had been her name?

"Kura…Sakura…" Takumi felt the words come out of his mouth before he could stop himself. He started dumbfounded at the TV screen. Although Sakura's face was only slightly visible from the camera angle, his eyes caught her. Her pastel pink hair no longer were tied up in high pigtails. She had matured as well…

This is why he didn't want to come to Japan.

He was too close.

Too close.

To everyone.

Suddenly, flashes of faces of everyone he had met during high school started coming back. He had dived in her world to such an extent that her friends had become his friends, there was no distinction. He remembered the Student Council, the Maid latte, Misaki's family, her father, that awful insignificant boy… He had come too close to her entire world.

Why had he decided to come back?

He didn't want to fucking reminiscence. He wanted to move on.

He ran a hand through his hair as flashes of Minako Ayuzawa and Suzuna Ayuzawa painted their images in his mind. Takumi had always had a close relationship with the two, since they were quite fond of him.

But,

They must be hating him now.

Of course, after all he had done to her daughter, what mother wouldn't hate him?

His nerves were on fire, as he felt guilt, remorse and pain cover his entire being. He had destroyed his one chance, his one shot at a happy life. He had fucking messed up.

They all must hate him so much.

Takumi wasn't ever one to think much about what people thought of him, but this was a different case. These were the people who would give their life for Misaki,

Hell, he would have given up his own life for Misaki too,

But what he had done was the opposite…

He ran a shaking hand through his hair as he grit his teeth, he searched for the remote of the damn TV set as UxMishi songs kept playing over and over, deafening him, showing him things he didn't want to see, making him _remember_ when all he wanted to do was _forget._

Everything happened in a flash, Takumi picked up his diamond pen holder and threw it on the TV when he felt like he couldn't bear to listen anymore. He stared at the broken glass lying everywhere, to his luck, Aaron and his team had to knock on his door at the same moment.

He didn't care, he stormed out of the room without a single word.

Mia stood by the entry of his office, and stared with her wide eyes, the mess that he had made. Satomi kept a comforting hand on her shoulder but Mia didn't react, she kept staring at the broken shards, trying to find what made him mad this time.

* * *

Later that night, Mia went back to his mansion. She had decided to ask him what happened later today but all her plans were thrown out of the window. Takumi wasn't home.

Mia stared at the empty corridors that seemed to never end. She walked them slowly, touching the velvet red walls in the process. She looked up at the mini chandeliers hanging off the ceiling as she walked. The mansion seemed so dead without its owner. She wondered how long had such a beautiful place been abandoned.

Was she ever going to uncover the mystery behind Takumi? It seemed like a distant dream. With the pace their relationship was going on, she was sure that he was never going to open up to her.

She wanted to know things about him…She didn't want to know how many awards he had won or how many companies he had overthrown. She wanted to see his raw self, the demons that kept him awake, the nightmares that scared him, and the inspiration that fueled him to be better. There was so much to know, and so much to ask…

Mia found herself standing in front of the room in which Takumi had been staying. He had told her that there was a library down here somewhere too…strange, isn't it?

She remembered him telling her not to open a particular room when he had shown her around. What was in that room? It seemed to be a pretty ordinary room to her. What sounded stranger to her was the fact that he had never stayed in the mansion before _yet_ he was very particular about not showing her that particular room. What was in that room that made him try to hide it from her?

She stood up from the sofa chair, she wanted to see what that room all about was. Hell, she didn't care if she made him angry or something. She'd explain.

And,

He wasn't home, so there was a pretty good chance that he wasn't ever going to find out that she had been in that room anyway.

Mia found some strength and guts as she swallowed her anxiety and got out of Takumi's room. She didn't have a very good memory of the mansion, so she'd have to look around until she found that room.

The rooms looked awfully similar from the corridors. At this rate, she would need a stupid map to go by! Mia pinched her forehead in frustration as she looked around. She walked slowly and cautiously, trying to remember where exactly had that room been.

She stilled when she heard small bells chime. Where did that sound come from? She knew that there was nobody around except for her, and all the maids were off duty as well.

Mia ignored those sounds and moved further into the living room on the first floor. It was pretty spacious and there were fresh flowers in many places kept in vases. Mia sighed, what was the use of keeping fresh flowers and cleaning the entire place even when nobody was there to stop and appreciate its beauty?

It seemed like the maids around here were more passionate about this mansion more than Takumi, Mia tsked. She didn't understand Takumi. How could he, who was so particular and organized in his professional life, be so careless in his personal life? It seemed as if he didn't care much about such things.

More like, he didn't _have_ the time to care about such things.

Mia decided not to get sidetracked and moved on to the rooms. She found the library Takumi had been talking about. There was also a gymnasium and a Japanese styled room that was completely bare. There were traditional Japanese tables that she had seen in typical Japanese restaurants before but she didn't know why they were here. She should have asked her parents more about the Japanese heritage. At least, she should have known where she came from.

But it seemed like the room was more like a practice room for martial arts. That would explain why the room was bare and had Japanese scripted hangings on the walls. Did Takumi know martial arts as well? She laughed, he might as well.

With each room she explored, the more did Takumi start to look like a stranger. The Takumi that must have lived in this mansion didn't resemble the Takumi she knew. The Takumi she knew was very particular and much focused for his work, so focused that he threw away everything else. But, the Takumi who must have lived here looked like a fun person, who enjoyed and invested in various hobbies. He looked like someone who thoroughly enjoyed the flavors of life.

The more she tried to deduce about Takumi from this house, the more unpleasant did her Takumi started to look. Compared to him, her Takumi looked like a work robot.

 _What changed him?_ Mia felt like meeting the Takumi from this house now. Everything now seemed so unsettling to her…

She twisted the knob of another room, wondering what more would she found about Takumi. The door of the room was just like any other room. She twisted the knob, and heard a click sound. What would this room contain? If she was the one making this house, she wouldn't even have thought about having so many rooms!

"Mia?"

Mia stilled, who was that? The painfully absolute voice made it pretty clear, she sighed and almost panicked. Well, she hadn't done anything wrong, so there was no reason for her to be scared. She held herself high and turned around as she let go of the door knob.

"Takumi" She half smiled, "What's up?"

"What are you doing here?" He asked calmly as he ran a hand through his hair. Mia smiled, "Well, I decided to show up because I thought you weren't feeling well and needed someone to talk to. When did you come?"

"Just now." He answered looking at his watch, "Its almost midnight."

"Where were you?" She asked. Was it too personal?

 _No,_ she decided, _if she wanted to know more about him, she'd have to start asking from the scratch._

"In a meeting." He replied.

 _Of course, in another boring meeting,_ Mia sighed, why was he so hard to talk to?

"What are you doing here?" he asked, again.

"I just told you…I—"

"I mean, in front of this room. I thought I told you not to go in?"

"Oh!" she laughed, "I got lost, was this that room? Every door is identical so I had no way of knowing…"

He didn't say a word.

Mia bit her lip, was he mad at her?

"I'm sor—"

"No, its okay. Did you eat something yet?" He asked as he turned around and walked towards his room.

Mia quietly followed him, she hadn't eaten anything, she was busy exploring… She couldn't tell if Takumi was plainly tired or angry inside. She decided to keep quiet and follow him instead of being nosy.

"You're awfully quite today, not your usual self." She heard Takumi say, they were in his room and he was taking off his blazer.

"No, _you're_ not your usual self today." Mia said, she felt him stop doing whatever he was doing and chuckle, "What is my usual self?" She heard him say as he took off the cufflinks and unbuttoned the top few buttons of his shirt. Somehow, now, she could feel the meaning of his ambiguous words… True. What was his usual self? She didn't have an answer to that, but she decided to cheer him up anyway.

"You know, your usual awful self." She grinned.

"Awful, you say?" Takumi raised an eyebrow at her as he stopped unbuttoning his shirt and got comfortable.

"Of course, I was just looking around and realized how different you are from what you show yourself to be." Mia looked up at the ceiling as she sat on the edge of the bed with her legs dangling down.

"From what I show myself to be? I don't show myself to be anyone." Takumi shrugged as he sat next to her. He didn't know what to say or how to react to what Mia had said.

"Exactly." Mia cupped his cheek with an endearing smile. "I want you to show me what you are made up of. I want to know more."

"You know everything you'll ever need to know about me." Takumi said as he took her hand away from his face, "There isn't much to know, I'm sorry if I disappoint you, Kirei, but I've always been my boring self." He chuckled for a moment, never a smile, "There's no fun side to me."

"But this house speaks quite the opposite." Mia stood up, "You were the one who designed everything in this house, right? I looked around, Takumi. This place is a masterpiece."

"Should I say, thanks?" He joked as he laid flat on his back and used his arm as a pillow. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"I wish you would just stop putting me in circles with your words." Mia looked away as Takumi turned to the other side, "I'm sorry for not being an adventure, Kirei…"

Mia kept silent as she watched him close his eyes. He seemed tired tonight, so she didn't say much. She would have several other occasions to do so…

She watched his breaths become calm and rhythmic. He was fast asleep… Mia put the lavender comforter on him so that he didn't feel cold in the night. She kneeled down near the bed and watched him sleep peacefully, falling asleep right there.

* * *

 _He remembered the yellow sundress he had gifted her,_

The blush on her face was worth everything he had owned. He would give up his entire being and surrender, just for that blush on her face. He had loved it when she would turn red upon his snide, perverted remarks about her figure when she had come out wearing that sundress. He felt so proud, because he was the one who had put that smile upon her face. He felt so happy, because he was the reason why her heart started to race suddenly. He could make her nervous, by just coming close to her. He had loved each and every thing about her being in love with him.

He was the luckiest bastard alive.

Literally.

 _He remembered how she had took his head in her own when they were at the beach,_

She had started to run in the direction of the wind. She had teased him and challenged him for a race. He remembered how beautiful she had looked as she ran on the wet sand. He remembered how she had wet her dress because the wave washed over them whilst they played like kids.

He remembered how she had protested when he had taken off his own shirt and put it over her wet sundress. He remembered that feeling of possessiveness and anger surge through when the yellow sundress had gotten wet and become almost transparent. She had yelled at him, and told him that it wasn't a big deal. She had scrunched up her nose and told him that the only pervert on the beach was him, and assured him not to go crazy. He had laughed, and put the shirt on her.

She had blushed red when he walked by her side, in nothing but a pair of half-trousers. She had told him angry that because of him, she looked like an idiot. She had also admitted that she liked the sundress a lot. He remembered looking at her, mesmerized.

That day, he remembered when Misaki had gotten awfully silent when some girls came towards him. He hadn't noticed, obviously, because he had been busy looking at her. She had grown silent and looked away when the girls had started to give him stuff and ask for pictures.

He had politely declined.

He remembered how he had taken her away from all those people because all he wanted to do was be alone. He remembered kissing her, letting his emotions out. He remembered holding her hands above her head, pushing her against a tree, and taking off his shirt from her. He remembered telling her that she could flaunt the yellow sundress all she wanted, as long as nobody was watching. He remembered how the blush on her face was quite matching with the red flowers on the sundress. She had laughed and told him that she was never wearing this "stupid" dress again.

They both knew that it was a lie.

He remembered when she had suddenly kissed him out of the blue when he had been driving. Misaki's graduation was almost over, and Takumi had decided that he was going to ask her to move in with her. He remembered how shy she had been to initiate the kiss. He remembered the tightening in his throat when he felt like he couldn't even convey even half of the love he had for her. He remembered when she had told him that she was happy, to be with him.

 _He was the one to blush that day._

The red flowers of her dress were soon replaced by blood.

He remembered her cries of pain when Gerard had driven a knife through her. He remembered how he was consumed in rage. He remembered being helpless—tied in those stupid iron chains. He remembered watching her struggle, and fight. He remembered how she had thrown a couple of kicks and punches in Gerard's way that broke his nose. He remembered when he pulled Misaki's hair angrily and slammed it on the wall. He remembered her falling down. He remembered blood. He remembered screaming. He remembered shouting. He remembered tears. He remembered the boiling rage that he felt. He remembered realizing that there wasn't much he could do.

He remembered surrendering. He remembered realizing that there was no way he could be with her as long as his family was alive. He remembered how his mind had raced, how Gerard would have found out any other way to separate them, how the only way of her being happy was without him in her life. He remembered Misaki lying down unconscious on the dirty floor. He remembered Gerard laughing, and wondering if he had gone too far. He remembered saying that he would do anything that he wanted as long as she was safe.

He remembered sighing papers, making promises that he didn't want to make. He remembered Gerard saying that if he tried to get out of these promises, he would find Misaki again. He remembered kissing her forehead as she lay in her own blood. He remembered how he had punched Gerard when he was let loose. He remembered feeling so guilty, helpless, and miserable as he held her in his lap. He remembered how he had asked Gerard to leave him alone with Misaki, for a moment. A small moment.

He remembered his words, his tears, his heartbeat, the sweet nothings and the apologies he had whispered in her ears that were dead to the world. He remembered calling up his unlikely friend, Kanou Soutaro, from the med school.

He remembered that awful night vividly, how he had taken her to Kanou's private clinic with Gerard right behind him—watching with an amused grin on his face. Takumi had decided that he was wipe the floor with that grin someday.

He had held her wrist carefully as Kanou proceeded to clean up her wounds, even if he was not from the field. Kanou hadn't asked much questions, and he was grateful for that. Takumi had almost laughed in his own misery, "Remember how you wanted her to hate me back in high school. Today is your chance to take her away from me."

Kanou had kept silent the entire time. He was always one to work better in pressure. Takumi was thankful that he could at least take the pain of this incident from her memory, with his help. He knew he had to get out of her life, but it didn't have to leave a scar on her.

Kanou had told him that he could easily erase, or overwrite the incident from her memory since she had a concussion. It would be easy. He had asked Takumi to write down everything on a piece of paper and leave.

Takumi remembered kissing her for the last time, saying his goodbyes, apologizing, telling her that he'd find her in another life. He told her that he would be hers, in another life, and nobody would stand in his way. He told her that he'd keep all his promises and make her fall in love with him over and over again. He told her to keep smiling and be her own self, no matter what. He told her to be strong, and accomplish her goals. He told her that he wouldn't keep a watch on her, but he would go on, if she was happy in her own life.

He remembered Kanou telling him that he didn't have much time. He remembered writing with shaking hands on a piece of paper, all the lies that he wanted to tell Misaki. He almost laughed as tears blurred his vision, she would never be fooled by simple lies, so he had to make a strong case.

He gave the keys of his mansion to Kanou, telling him how it was a gift for her, how he had spent his time designing every single surface of the house, how he had made the house without the Walker money, how he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her there…

He lastly remembered how pale she looked, lying still on the bed, with her clothes muddy and bloody. He remembered looking at her so that he wouldn't forget her, even in a thousand years. He remembered cursing himself for doing this to her. He remembered how happy Gerard had been, and how unsatisfied he had felt when he slammed his face on the trunk of his car.

* * *

He remembered everything, how he would scream in the middle of the night, how he sunk lower than he already had every single day, how he tried to move forward, how he tried to stay away as much as possible. How he would wake up with tears in his eyes and her name on his lips.

 _Just like he did now._

He realized he was in the same room as he had been a few hours ago. He realized he was covered in a lavender comforter. He realized that she was staring at him with tears in her eyes. He realized that she kept saying "Misa?" over and over again, mimicking his own words.

He ran a hand through his hair as he remembered he had a nightmare, after a very long time. With his blurred vision, it took him long to realize that the woman sitting in front of him wasn't Misa.

It was Mia.

* * *

 **||READ||REVIEW||FAVORITE||FOLLOW||**

 _A/N: So guys, what did you think! Mia finally has a hint about Misaki. I apologize for not being able to update, but I hope this chapter was worth it. Let me know what you thought and stay tuned!_


	11. Chapter 11

**||~MISS~KIREI~||**

 **Today, I decided to answer the reviews from the last chapter, since I have some time to spare.**

 **Leopio**

Hello, I don't update a little faster because I cannot. My life is too fast paced these days with little to no time to spare. But I do try as fast as I can. I feel like if I try to update a little faster, the quality of the chapters will reduce. I am very picky with my content and each chapter takes a lot of hard work and careful crafting so that the readers can enjoy. But I'll try my best! Thanks.

About Takumi, I think you should see this story in a different perspective. It is very realistic and very often in life, we do not behave 'ideally'…Sometimes, things are out of our control, so maybe that's why you think that Takumi had stooped too low. Try to see things from his perspective or put yourself in his shoes. Thank you.

 **Princessgalaxy**

Hello, I don't think Mia is Misa. Read chapter 8's ending and you'll realize. Thank you.

 **LisaXShun**

Hello, don't cry J and I know right! Life is too unfair. Lets see if Takumi and Misaki meet in the future.

 **Patricia Walker**

Hello, I'm so happy to see that you're so passionate about this story. It makes me to happy long reviews :D I think you'll forgive Gerard, he wasn't in the right mind before. Jealously made him that way. Mia might go to that room soon, don't worry. Thanks for your kind compliments, I'll be sure to arrange a meeting of Takumi and Misaki soon, if the story permits J

 **putriaryx**

Soon…Soon…J

 **Padfoot Starfyre**

Hello, I don't think Suzuna would treat him same as before, but time does the healing J I think that things are going to go downhill for Mia as we progress further into this story. Let's see how Mia reacts.

 **Unknown**

Hello, as you asked, I have made a note to you. Please the note I have written in the chapter 4 of this story. I have mentioned, _"Mia and Takumi will never have an actual, genuine, serious, proper relationship throughout the length of the story."_ I hope this answers your question ;) don't be depressed!

 **Takumisa17**

Hello, always good to hear from you!

 **Minniemiss123**

Hello, the author of the longest and most fun to read reviews! I'm always happy to read your reviews J I feel so glad that you're so passionate about my stories, so much love and wishes to you, love. I hope you enjoy this chapter, since you hate Mia so much…

 **Guest**

Me too…me too.

 **Guest**

Don't worry. As you said, Nobody can replace someone's source of happiness J

 **Lmizutani**

Hello, Yes, I had mentioned that in the end, Mia will let Takumi go. I think this chapter will take away all your doubts. Enjoy!

 **Knight Lynx**

Hello, thanks for the compliments J

 **That was it for today. Moving on,**

 **I think I'm losing my readers. It probably has something to do with the fact that I update too late. I was really sad because of losing readers…I hope I can update faster.**

 **Anyway, the reviews from last chapter made me really happy. I hope you enjoy this update.**

 _You guys hated Mia, right?_

* * *

 **Chapter 10**

 **The Girl Who Got Too Attached**

Gerard walked down the staircase that was connected to his private jet, down on the land. He looked around, it had been quite a long time since he had come here. It had been five years. Five years since he had let his demons out. Five years since he had destroyed his brother's life.

He didn't have much time for a soliloquy, he decided. Without wasting much time looking around and talking to the news reporters, he went to the car that awaited him.

Japan had changed.

Developed seemed to be a better word to describe the city. He never was found of this place and the number of smokers here. He unlocked his phone, which still had a wallpaper of his wife set on the home screen. Quite frankly, Charlotte had opened his eyes. He could now feel the pain of seeing your loved one be in the arms of some other man. It had boiled his blood alright. But, he had realized something more—he realized his sins, and now wanted to make amends.

He found himself standing in front of a psychologist's clinic. _"Kaa-nnnou Sou-taero"_ He read out, in his broken Japanese. He laughed at his pronunciation, it was dripping in British.

When Kanou declined to meet him, Gerard knew this was to happen. He stood his ground though, and told the receptionist that he wouldn't leave until Mr. Kanou had a word with him personally.

Gerard, who was never one to play by other people's rules, was quite amazed at the fact that Kanou could be quite stubborn, despite his reputation. No man in Britain would have the guts to keep him up waiting for more than five minutes, and _this man_ …he had managed to make him stay for _six_ whole hours and still refused to call him in. Gerard's patience was put to test but he stayed put in his sofa chair, reading a newspaper, checking his mails, making phone calls, wasting his time…

When it was half past 9, the receptionist had told him that he was the last person, and allowed him to go inside. Gerard sighed. Well, at least he could get rid of the numbness he felt in his bottoms from all the sitting and sulking now…

Gerard walked inside, and found a man sitting in his chair. He still wore glasses and his hair had been pushed back neatly. "I see you've matured quite well." He made an attempt at complimenting the man, who just tched.

"I suppose you didn't come here to chit-chat. Was there nobody who would listen to your bullshit in Britain so you had to come all the way here?"

Gerard almost raised an eyebrow, well well…the boy who couldn't even speak in public was now sitting in front of him with his head held high… Times sure changed.

He merely sat down on the empty sofa even if Kanou didn't tell him to, "I suppose you're right."

"What do you want from me?" Kanou asked as he shut his laptop and pinched the bridge of his nose, "Don't you think you made enough mess five years ago?"

"Ah, I see your memory is fresh." Gerard said with a polite smile that came out as a sickening smirk, "I've come here to talk about Ayuzawa Misaki."

"I refuse. The exit door is to your left." Kanou stood up at the mention of Ayuzawa Misaki, his blood boiled at his words. Did Gerard really expect him to sit down and have tea with him and talk about how he had almost murdered Misaki?

"So impatient. Wouldn't you want to at least give me the benefit of doubt?" Gerard asked, he reminded himself to be polite, Kanou was the only link he had. He couldn't afford to lose it just because of his temper.

"There is no doubt here, I do not want to talk to you. Leave or I'll call the security."

Gerard laughed, "You don't think I came unprepared, did you? Your security men are no match for mine, I thought you would have known."

"I'm not twenty anymore." Kanou spoke, "Things wouldn't be the same as they were before now. A lot has changed. You cannot just come around and threaten me."

"Ah, I'm not here to threaten you or anything" Gerard smiled as he made a cross sign with his arms, "I'm just here to get some information."

"I have no information for you whatsoever." Kanou said.

"I feel like that is a biased reply." Gerard said.

Kanou stood up from his seat and walked towards Gerard, he extended an arm with a smile on his face. "It was nice meeting you again. Not really though." Gerard began to feel dizzy as soon as his hand touched Kanou's, "This is for what you did five years ago, you bastard." He said as he walked away.

He knew that Gerard would be covered in men before Kanou could even think of hurting him physically. So, he had found a better way to torment him. The injection which he had put in his veins would keep him out nice and tight, triggering all sorts of bad memories and nightmares for a long time. Even if he couldn't lay a finger on him physically, he could at least pay him back for what he had done to his friends by torturing him mentally and emotionally. Kanou smirked as he got out of his room, he was done for the day.

* * *

I hadn't realized I'd fallen asleep back then. I opened my eyes to the sound of someone in pain. Naturally, I panicked. I stood up and felt the ache in my neck and back from my uncomfortable sleeping position. I looked all around, on high alert. There was nobody to be seen.

Then what were those sounds?!

I turned to my object of fascination—Takumi.

He was having a nightmare.

I went straight to him as soon as I found him, mumbling, sweating, on the verge of crying. His brows were furrowed, and he looked like he was in pain. Gingerly, I tried to comfort him. I put his head in my lap and tried to wake him up and gently as possible.

"Takumi" I cooed as I put my fingers in his ever so smooth and silky blonde hair. I wonder what he saw that made him so restless. It freaked me out to my core, but I didn't know what else to do. "Its going to be okay…" I said as my heart twisted painfully in my chest. I didn't like seeing him in pain, considering this was the first time I got a glimpse of him looking vulnerable.

He mumbled something incoherently and I couldn't make out the words that came out of his mouth. Was he calling out my name?

"I-I'm right here!" I felt my voice break with the hurt and misery scattered all over his face. "T-Takumi! Please! Open your eyes!" I gingerly touched his cheeks and tried to shake him awake, but to no avail.

"Mi..." The broken syllables that came out of his mouth sounded like he was trying to reach out to someone, anyone!

"I'm right here…I'm right here…" I said as softly as I could in my frantic, half-lucid and half freaked out state. I felt his hand reach out to something, not in particular. I held his hand. "Takumi, wake up…"

He opened his eyes that were darker than usual. The emeralds turned into fierce forest greens, and I wondered what made him so messed up. Even in a crumpled shirt and messed up hair, he still looked like he had some magical makeup on. But fuck that, I felt like he was still in a lucid state, so I decided to make him snap out of it.

"Takumi? Wake up. I'm right here for you." I told him and managed a smile through my freakiest night in Japan. He looked up strangely at me.

"Misa?"

"Misa?" I heard myself repeat what he had said like a fool. He reached out to me in a way he had never before. I felt his warm palm cupping my cheek as he called out the same name again.

"Misa?" He gave me a broken smile which he had probably reserved for a long time. This was the first time he had smiled at me, even though it was a broken smile, it was a genuine one. My heart broke as he pulled me in his arms and kept speaking _something_ that I couldn't put a finger on.

Because he was speaking in Japanese.

He held me tight, in his arms, as he kept saying the name over and over again. I, being so dumbstruck at the moment, could not process what was going on.

He had never held me like this before.

He had never touched me like this before.

I sunk lower and lower as I felt the depth of emotions with every word he spoke and every embrace that he showered me with. I had never felt such powerful emotions from him before.

He had touched me in a lot of ways, he had kissed me in a lot of ways, he had held me in a lot of ways.

But they were too shallow, too _fake_ , compared to what he had shown me today. Tears started to flow out of my eyes with each moment in which I realized that _this—_ this was the real Takumi.

 _Then who was the person I'd known for such a long time?_

I felt myself pushing him awake, getting out of his hold, moving away from him. He questioned my motives at one point of time, and the smile on his face, the first one that he had shown me, vanished as soon as I used both my palms to push him away and use all of my strength.

"Snap out of it!" I felt myself scream as I fell down on the floor. I wasn't strong as compared to him, but in his vulnerable state, I had managed to throw him off balance. Luckily, he had fallen on the bed, and I had fallen down on the floor.

My cries were deafening to my own self as I hid my face in my hands. My tears had refused to stop and at that moment, I couldn't bring myself to care either. I had never felt such a strangling, and heartbreaking feeling in my gut.

I saw him sit up. He ran a hand through his hair with a stoic look on his face. The Takumi I knew was back. He looked at me quizzically as he stood up and gave me a hand to stand up, "What happened?" He asked in his monotone voice.

His hand reminded me of how he had embraced me moments ago, how he had surrendered to me completely, how I could see the look of longing in his eyes, how this person standing in front of me was not the same person.

With shaking hands I put his palm on my cheek…

It wasn't the same as before. I realized, I wasn't the recipient to his love, I wasn't the person he had surrendered to, and I wasn't the person he longed for.

"I'm not _"Misa"…_ " I felt voice break and my legs retreat on their own, and I swear I had seen his eyes widen. He stood frozen in his spot, trying to find some words to say, but I didn't want to see any more than I had seen, I didn't want to hear any more than I had heard, because I knew that the word that would come out of his mouth was "Misa" and the person whom he longed for would not be me.

I closed the door behind me and the realizations started to hit me like bullets one by one. How could I have been so utterly ignorant? I unconsciously hugged myself as I remembered the Takumi I had encountered some moments ago. He seemed so passionate and raw, unlike the person I knew.

"Okay, are you willing to listen?" I heard his impatient voice through the door. What more was left there for me to listen? I kept the doors shut by supporting my back on it as I sat down. All this fiasco had drained me of my energy. I could not think straight, not when the tears refused to stop, and my heart refused to behave.

"Its…" He went on. From his irritated voice, I could recognize the fact that he had trouble talking about this matter out loud.

"It's not what it seems like." He finished in a one liner, I felt myself tch-ing at those empty words. I felt him put his palm on the door out of frustration. I could imagine him gritting his teeth or just simply running a hand through his hair.

"I—" The words remained in my throat as I tried to put an end to the hiccups I was having, thanks to my infinitive crying. I didn't know how to react or what to say. The only word that swam in my mind was "Misa"….and I tried to visualize this _Misa…_ what would she look like? Well, she must have been really pretty.

So pretty that she managed to make Takumi have dreams about herself.

The more my brain sped up, the more realizations I was hit with. The more I pondered upon the subject, the more my insecurities, my weaknesses laughed at me.

I felt so worthless, so small. Somewhere in the deep, dark corners of my mind I knew my worth. I mean, I had always known I wasn't good enough for Takumi. He was smart, intelligent, reserved, hard-working, rich, gorgeous….

 _I was never a match for him._

I felt my legs grow a mind of their own as I stood up. Before I realized what I was doing, I stormed out of that room, out of those corridors, out of that building. I realized it was still night. Where was I supposed to go in the middle of the night? I seated myself under the cherry blossom tree that I had spotted as soon as I had entered the mansion premises.

After many hiccups, I decided to calm myself down. This was enough crying for a night. I felt like I needed to see this situation in a better light. They say, it's always better to look at the positive side of a circumstance.

Sadly, there was no positive side of this.

First of all, I didn't even know what to infer from the situation. I didn't know what I should make out of this. Was he cheating on me? Was he still living in the ghosts of a past relationship? Did I come in between him and that Misa person? If he really loved her, why did he leave? What does he feel for me? Does he even feel anything for me? Then why me?

Where do I fit in all this?

 _Yeah, Mia. Where do YOU fit in all this?_

I closed my eyes as more tears tried to escape me. _I didn't fit in all this_. At this point, I just wanted to escape this mess. I didn't know what to do or how to react. I needed to re-evaluate this situation with a better state of mind. I leaned in by using the trunk of the Sakura tree for support and closed my eyes. The morning birds were chirping and I realized this was close to 4am in the morning. I decided to concentrate on their chirping voices to distract myself. Soon, they lulled me to sleep filled with uncomfortable sights.

 _The sun rays were too bright for my closed eyelids._ I realized I was staring into emerald eyes as soon as I opened my own. They reminded me of how wild, how fierce they had turned into, a few hours ago. I snapped out of my trance and backed off as soon as I realized that Takumi was sitting in front of me. He sat straight with his legs uncrossed, one hand on top of his knee and another knee stretched out. His appearance was a striking contrast to what it was a few hours ago—he was wearing his formal pants—with his crisp shirt tucked neatly in. His hair pushed back to the side was a sight rare to be seen.

He had been staring intently at me, his face bore no expression whatsoever. Never a smile as always, but devoid of his signature playful smirk. He looked dead serious. I searched for words—but nothing came out of my sore throat. I ended up coughing.

He handed me a handkerchief and I looked away when I accepted it. I realized his blazer was kept folded on his left. Perhaps he was leaving for work. I felt tears brimming up.

He had been zero percent affected by whatever took place the night before.

He was just leaving for office just like he did every other day, and had probably spotted me—sleeping under a stupid tree like a homeless girl.

I stood up as soon as the tears escaped me no matter how hard I tried to contain them. I turned away—I didn't want to look pathetic in front of him any more than I already did. I felt like the girl who got too attached, the girl who got too affected.

The girl who got too involved.

Without realizing I was horribly crying, I had walked out of the garden. I didn't care what I looked like or how I sounded, I just wanted to get away from this…this feeling. This feeling that sat in the pit my stomach.

The next thing I'd felt except for the strangling feeling in my heart was Takumi's hand, gripping my wrist. Surprised, I turned around. What did he want from me now?

I faced him with my teary, worn down face. He looked at a loss of words. He didn't let go of my hand as I saw him search for words. _The man who could shut anyone's mouth with a one liner was speechless_. His hand went straight to his hair—a habit he had picked up when he was frustrated. My lips quivered and I looked away—there was a limit to how much I could look at him without breaking down. He tugged on my hand—urging me to look at him, but I just couldn't.

 _I couldn't…_

He dragged me along with him, when he had started walking. I could feel the strength of his hand on mine. But I felt no pain no matter how hard he pulled me and made me walk behind him. He wouldn't say a word, or look at me. He just kept walking till I could see the doors of the mansion. He walked up the small flight of stairs effortlessly as I kept stumbling behind him.

He pushed the wooden door open and pulled me inside. I didn't know where to look so I looked on the floor, and almost jumped when he used one of his legs to kick the door shut with a loud thud. It scared me to my core, but I stayed put. I didn't want to be the one to initiate any sorts of conversation with him, I just wanted to go in a corner of my room and cry my eyes out until I get this painful twisted feeling out of my heart.

I think I pissed him off when I looked away because the next thing I knew, he was holding the both of my arms and staring into my eyes that hid his anger behind his retina.

"Look," he finally spoke, and I did. He kept his hand on the wall next to me and sighed, "Please do not misunderstand my behavior last night. To be honest I don't quite… never mind that, but I was having a bad dream…" he trailed off and I felt my throat tighten but only a chuckle escaped my tired throat.

"Misunderstand? T-Takumi, I misunderstood our entire relationship!" I laughed miserably at my own stupidity, "I shouldn't even call it a relationship…I feel like it was more of my own fault…I got too attached to you while you…" I stopped speaking as I realized my voice was going to break again.

"No" he said as his phone buzzed. I had expected him to pick up the call and just leave me right here, but he didn't. I felt hopeful for a second there, I felt like he felt sorry…

"It's not like that. It was just that dream that made me…" he trailed off again but his phone rang again. I saw him curse out and pick up the phone in frustration.

"For goodness sake Peter, can't it wait?" He almost yelled into his phone, and I was truly scared by his anger. He got strangely quite as he listened to the person on the phone. He cut the call afterwards and I looked at him again, hoping he would continue this.

"Something happened in the office." He informed me, as he backed off, "Can you give me some time?" he asked.

I was wrong.

It didn't affect him at all. I had gotten too selfish that moment, I didn't care that he had responsibilities, I didn't care that he was the CEO of an organization, I didn't care if he needed time.

I just wanted an honest answer from the man inside him. But I think that the boy inside him was dead, or locked away. He merely lived for the business, for the charities, for the parties, for the work.

"I wonder if you would have given this more priority if the person standing in front of you wasn't me, but _Misa."_ I said harshly, without caring what I had sounded like, what I had spoken out loud, or how I behaved. I was out of the way, maybe. But I didn't care. I had never had a jealous streak in my blood and bones before, but now as I walked out of his house, with broken pieces of my heart in my hands and tears in my eyes, I wished I was Misa—whoever she was, whatever she was. I wish I was Misa, so that maybe…maybe Takumi would have reciprocated my love.

So that maybe he would have always held me the way he held me, thinking I was Misa.

So that maybe he would have always touched me the way he touched me the night prior, thinking I was his Misa.

So that maybe I wouldn't have been the one walking out with a broken heart.

God, how selfish and mean could love make us? I could have never imagined myself thinking such things in my head, or wishing I was someone else. Love was a dangerous aphrodisiac—it could give you pleasure and pain at the same time. I wish I had never indulged in such a feeling, I wish I had seen all the signs, I wish I had taken all those warnings seriously…but most of all?

 _I wish I was Misa,_

 _No matter who she was or what it meant._

* * *

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 **||~MISS~KIREI~||**


	12. Chapter 12

**||~MISS~KIREI~||**

 **I HAVE NEVER BEEN SO UNMOTIVATED TOWARDS MY STUDIES AS I AM TODAY.**

 **So I decided to update.**

 _"_ _You guys hated Mia, right?"_

I had meant this sarcastically, but everyone took it literally. Geez, why do you guys hate Mia so much? It's not like she had any idea about Misaki before. Tell me, if you were in her place, what would you have done? She only found about Misaki now. Like I really want to read reviews/pm in which you mention what you would have done if you were Mia. I'll sincerely wait for them.

Those reviews made me laugh so hard.

* * *

 **Chapter 11**

Takumi stared at the piece of paper lying neatly on his desk. He pinched the bridge of his nose and look out as the branch manager shivered, standing opposite to the CEO. He wiped his sweat repeatedly.

"M-Mister Walker!" The said man stuttered as he wiped his forehead, "I'm sure I can explain! Th-That lawyer had visited an-and I-I had tried to get rid of this case b-but it didn't work!" his legs wobbled as he adjusted his tie over and over again. He searched for any emotion, or reaction, on Takumi's face, but there was none. That was what made the entire situation so freaky for the man. There was dead silence in the office, and he could see people standing outside the office and imagine them sticking their goddarn ears on the door.

He felt ashamed and humiliated. He was the branch manager of Walker-Japan. And yet he was standing here, in front of the CEO. It was all that bitch lawyer's fault. But in all fairness, he had tried to dismiss the case off the desk—he had even told her that he was ready to give her anything… _anything_ as long as she let it slide. But she had thrown him out. _The nerve of that woman!_

"Nakamura" Takumi looked at the man in front of him and snapped him out of his reverie, with a sigh he trailed off, "I'm sure you can explain _what_ exactly it is that you did," he stood up, hands in pockets as always, "…which made a human rights lawyer sue the corporation and go as far as getting government orders to get this branch closed?!"

"S-Sir…" the man, intimidated by his angry British accent, looked down. "I c-can explain!"

"Do the explaining to your family. You're going to be fired as soon as this fiasco ends." Takumi looked at his phone that was buzzing since the moment he had stepped inside the office. "I'll handle this myself."

"I-I apologize, M-Mister W-wuhalker!"

Takumi picked up the phone call, his eyes turned fierce green as he heard the voice on the phone,

 _"_ _Losing your touch, are you? What a shame upon our family name to have you as the heir."_ Gerard snickered hatefully, "You had one job to do, dear brother. ONE JOB!" he shouted angrily.

After Gerard stopped shouting, there was deafening silence, followed by Takumi's laughter into the phone, "If you were so scared about your precious organization, why did you entrust it to me? Why don't you take over now? Want me to mail you my resignation?" Takumi said, his tone turning from playful to dead serious. "Its time you took out your nose out of my business. Literally."

"Y-Your business?! Lost your mind, have you?!" Gerard shouted as the sound of something breaking in the background indicated that he lost his cool over the last comment. "A dog should know his place." He gritted into the phone, and Takumi merely smirked, "Careful how you talk to the heir of this foundation, don't want to end up on the streets, do you? Pathetic step-brother?"

Gerard kept silent as he cut the call. What just happened to Takumi? He was always a cocky asshole, but now, his words sounded more ruthless—carefree. He had never been one to engage in vocal banter with him, but today…today he had answers ready for every taunt he threw his way. Gerard realized that he was losing the Takumi he knew with every passing second.

"How far down are you planning to stoop, Takumi?" Gerard put his palm over his forehead as he looked at a piece of paper in his hands. It was the same government order that he had lost his cool over. Takumi's carefree attitude towards the situation only added fuel to the fire. He never told anything to Gerard. He should have at least discussed the ways to encounter this situation with him. But no, he just sounded insane over the phone call…

He made a paper ball out of the government orders as he continued to laugh, Japan was a fucking unfortunate place for him. He stared at his swollen hand that still had the after effects of the drug that bastard Kanou had given him. He stared at the mirror in front of him, running the same hand through his hair. He didn't fucking know what to do in this fucked up mess. His fucked up mind wouldn't cooperate with this fucked up situation.

He took out his handy gun and shot the mirror angrily as he walked out. He couldn't help but feel annoyed by everything. He was mad at himself, and somehow felt that maybe…maybe if he had more control over his anger a few years ago, things would have been different now…

* * *

"How long are you planning to stay inside?" Satomi spoke loudly into the wooden door, as she tried to twist the doorknob and see if Mia had finally unlocked it—but she hadn't.

Today, there was no reply. No single syllables or any kind of small, broken-voiced "go away"s came their way. Aaron had kept a comforting hand on her shoulder, "It's been three days, Ian. How long do you think she's going to stay like this?"

"I don't know." He sighed, "This is so not like Mia though."

Satomi chewed on her nail as she walked away and set down the tray of food that she had prepared for Mia. It had been three days since on morning Mia ran inside as soon as Satomi had unlocked the door. She was in pieces—crying and hiccupping, not saying a word. When Ian had asked her what happened, she just shut herself in her room and refused to come out. Aaron would try to open the door every day, but it just didn't work.

She sighed as she picked up her stuff and kept some food in the kitchen—just in case Mia decided to come out, and they all headed out for work.

* * *

Why is it why we're so afraid of pain, and not scared of happiness? If we look at it now, love and pain are a never ending cycle. Love gives birth to pain. Why don't we think twice before indulging in love? Why aren't we afraid of being too happy? The sum of everything is constant in life. If you're happy today, you're bound to cry tomorrow.

Mia hadn't thought she'd have to cry again, when she fell in love with Takumi. She was flying high, happy as a kite. She didn't see the clouds come in. She didn't see an end to her short lived happiness.

Why is it that we're not afraid of the aftermath? She always thought that being covered in bandages wouldn't hurt as much as scarping your knee would. Lying in bandages in your bed seemed less painful than falling down in the gravel, and bleeding.

But

We spend too much time thinking about the split second in which we get injured that we forget the pain the aftermath will bring.

The same was with love.

"In the darkest…darkest night" Mia stared at her fingers as she lay flat on her bed, staring at the ceiling.

"I search…" she turned to the side as the little light coming from her crème curtains made the shadows come alive on her bare walls. "I search through the crowds" she spoke the words slowly, almost singing as her eyes brimmed up with tears. "Your f-face is all that I-I…see" she finished the line as she used the same hand to wipe her tears that didn't stop coming.

She was tired.

She was so tired, replaying the same scene in her mind, over and over again. She was just being plain stupid now, she knew. But she couldn't stop herself. The events of that night came haunting her, in her dreams, in her reality. She hadn't expected something like this to happen to her.

To be fair with the situation, she hadn't known much about Takumi from the start. But she had tried. She was always hoping and trying to make him open up to her. She wanted to learn more about him than she had known. In the process, she fell in love. She always knew in her heart that Takumi was never a bad person. Maybe he was a bit moody sometimes, but he was never cruel or mean.

Then why did it have to turn out this way?

Just when she thought she had finally found love, why?

At this point, Mia was not even wiping her tears. She felt the small, hot droplets pour out inconsolably, going to the side of her face, wetting her neck. She was just plain stupidly out of her mind. So naïve. So stupid.

A part of her had wanted to forgive Takumi. Because she was too deeply in love with him, she had overlooked the fact that he had encouraged her feelings to develop some way or the other—by not stopping her.

If he was already in love with someone else. Why did he pursue her? She didn't know who this Misa was. Which made her mind stay up for three days, thinking about each and every scenario that could be true.

What if Takumi had a wife, and he had been cheating on her? Rich people do that a lot, don't they?

What if Takumi had been in love with Misa, but she hadn't returned his feelings?

What if Takumi had been double dating?

What she did not understand was—why would he go through the trouble of wooing another woman if he was already in love with someone else?

Why would he pursue her, if he loved someone else?

Wasn't he doing the Misa person wrong, by being with someone else?

If there was nothing that he felt for Mia, why did he get involved? And if he did, why was he reciting Misa-Misa inconsolably with a broken voice? Why was he longing for Misa?

Mia knew speculating and crying was not going to help her. She knew she would have to confront the situation and see him again, someday. She did want the answers, but right now, she wasn't ready to get her heart broken again so soon.

She felt like she would break down even if she saw Takumi's face. What would she say to him? She laughed as her heart twisted painfully in her chest,

"I guess, this is an end to us, isn't it, Takumi?" she asked the darkness, which engulfed her as the sky turned darker and she wondered what that Misa had, that she didn't.

* * *

Not much action in this one, huh? I think that this chapter was more like a filler, showing how they both are handling life after what happened. But, thee next chapter is going to be quite spicy.

 **|READ||REVIEW||FAVORITE||FOLLOW||**

 **Blabbing Corner**

Hey guys,

This is blabbing corner, sponsored by MissKirei.

I feel like I need to take a break from my life. My best friend told me I've lost the glow on my face and even my mother was even mentioning the same to me, even though I have been taking the same nutrition as I always do. I feel like I'm too engulfed in my studies and whatnots that I don't even get to go out with friends. If I get a day off from college, I spend it in sleeping (~ XD ) like I did today.

Sorry if this update came out shitty, I don't know what is wrong with me. But I tried my best. My exams are going on as we speak and I found some time to update today. I don't know when the next update will come, probably in the first week of June. Or it will be delayed because I'm interning in June and July.

BTW, I'm going to start writing a book. ;) Wish me luck!

If you want to blabb something too, feel free to contact me through reviews/pms…we'll complain about life together. ;D

* * *

 **||~MISS~KIREI~||**


	13. Chapter 13

**||~MISS~KIREI~||**

I admit, this chapter will have a slightly different taste. The theme of this chapter simply is to depict that at the end of the day, we're all humans. Even if you are a regular person, or a prince, or a CEO, or an award winning lawyer, you're all human.

* * *

 **Chapter 12: Humane**

Gerard paced his room with his hands behind his back. His wet, raven hair stuck to his forehead as he made no efforts of pushing them away. His bedroom looked cold and lifeless without Charlotte in it. After the day he saw her trying to bed Takumi, he had told her to go back to her mother's house. She had been crying, and trying to explain, but Gerard felt that he couldn't address this issue until he resolved his past mistakes. He thought about Charlotte every now and then, trying to figure out where he went wrong.

Who said arranged marriages could not make a person happy? Gerard had been quite neutral about his marriage with Charlotte in the beginning but as time went by, he found himself falling for her. He was happy, with her, for once in his life filled with miserable moments and terminal illness which he had even recovered from. Sadly, this wasn't the case with her.

He thought about what he didn't do. He thought what he didn't give her that made her move over to other men. He realized that marriage is more than materialistic things. He did a terrible job at showing his true emotions. He would shower her with gifts from all around the world, he would take her out in social gatherings, he would give her diamonds, but perhaps what he didn't give her, or perhaps what she had desired was passion.

Perhaps she wanted to be wooed like a young maiden? Perhaps all he needed to do was voice out how much he was in love with her? Perhaps all he needed to do was kiss her like he meant it. Hold her like he meant it. Touch her like she was all his.

Gerard gripped the railing of his balcony, where he stood, watching the trees dance to the rhythm of the wind. The lights from faraway places and homes twinkled from far away, as he thought about how his weakness was to realize his true emotions too late…

He smiled, as he thought about Takumi, who was quite the opposite. He was always loving and passionate when he was with Misaki, Gerard knew this, although he hadn't witnessed Takumi as a boy in love, he knew he was tender, and kind to the one he had loved with all his heart.

Gerard gripped his chest as he felt a very familiar, and murderous fit of cough come back. He panicked as he walked back inside the bedroom and started to cough again. His chest pained and his heart twisted painfully in his chest as he saw blood on his hands and realized that his hereditary terminal illness was a friend that hadn't left all along.

* * *

Takumi looked at the set of people sitting in front of him. The team from England had still not left Japan, upon his orders. Apparently there was a breach in the employee records. He averted his gaze from the set of people that were currently checking the records, in his office.

He had to figure out what exactly happened which got his company a government order to shut down. He didn't have much time to figure shit out and make a plan that would ensure the survival of WalkerJapan. As he continued working in his laptop, he noticed a chair was empty. A team member was missing.

"Aaron, is someone missing from your team?" he asked as he flipped another page and typed.

Aaron looked up, "Yes. Mia Kirei, our fourth member, is on leave today."

Mia's name rang through Takumi's mind as he looked up, he turned to Aaron, "We've been working non-stop for four days. I haven't seen your teammate since four days."

Aaron adjusted his shirt collar as he looked at Takumi, "Mia has been calling in sick. She's staying in the office accommodation with us but we haven't seen her in four days as well."

Satomi looked up when Takumi didn't say a word and just continued working. She was amazed at this guy's behavior. Mia had said that they were dating, but nobody knew. It was natural for him to act normal, but hell, Satomi only felt anger when she saw the lack of expression or any emotion on his stupid face. Yes, he was rich, he was the heir to the Walker foundation and was the next prince, the grandson of the Duke Rochester, of the Raven Castle—the heir to a multi-billion dollar group of companies with royal blood running through his veins, not to mention, really good looks. But, all this was garbage if he had a shit personality and a cold heart.

What she didn't understand was his lack of emotions. His face always looked—empty. Like he didn't want to be here. He never smiled, or frowned, or laughed, or engaged in normal, human conversations. She had only heard that he had gotten angry once, recently, because of something the branch manager had done. Wasn't he capable of feeling humane emotions? Wasn't he even slightly worried that his 'girlfriend' was not in the office since four days?

She felt herself tch-ing, thinking about the coldness in his persona. Satomi immediately decided that she didn't like Takumi Walker and his shit personality, and neither did she understand why Mia was so in love with him.

"Any issues, Miss Satomi?" She heard him speak, perhaps he had caught her staring and hating at him.

"Nothing at all, Sir." She said with an absolute voice as she got back to work, thinking how she'd settle with a man with an average job, instead of going for a perfect man with no heart and expressions.

Meanwhile, Takumi ran a hand through his hair. He hadn't left his office for the last three days. He had stayed in his office, napped in his sofa, and worked day and night. With the tiredness of three days weighing over him, he thought about calling Mia in his free time as he stifled a yawn…

* * *

I decided to give the outer world another chance as I pulled over the curtains of the room. The light blinded me and my eyes burnt as I looked outside. I was a vampire now, apparently so.

After almost four days of crying myself to stupidity, passing out, and being inevitably sad, I found my sanity back—to say the least. I touched my hair that were filled with my tears, my snot and the broken pieces of my heart. I decided to try my best and give this day a chance.

Cleaning and bathing took me an hour, even when I was motivated to get on with my usual routine, my hands didn't want to move. The majority of my body and soul wanted to hide in a pile of pillows and never return to the sane world of sociopaths. I couldn't help but feel like I was seeing the world in an entirely different today. I found myself staring blankly at inanimate objects, thinking about nothing much in particular.

After so much thinking, its natural for the mind to stop thinking altogether, right?

Right.

I picked up a plain set of clothes to adorn and looked in the mirror. I was greeted with a fresh face and tired red eyes. Nothing sunglasses couldn't cover.

I thought about what I wanted to do today. I didn't want to go to the office. It would involve too many human interactions, not what I'm quite looking for. Everyone was bound to ask questions to me, in context of my stupid behavior from a few nights ago as I crashed in the apartment shared by the four of us—Satomi, Ian, and Aaron. What was I thinking?

Yes, Mia, what was your awful, horrid self, thinking all this time?

Here I go again, as I found my heart constrict painfully in my chest, I knew I had to change the subject so that my mind didn't fuck me up with thoughts again. I remembered I needed to feed myself, so I got out of my hiding place, and scoured the kitchen for food.

The food was conveniently placed on the kitchen counter. I picked up the plate which contained toast, neatly arranged fruit and some granola. I picked it up –thankful to the person who had been so kind.

I didn't realize how hungry I was until I stared to eat and within a few moments, my plate was empty. I looked around to find some more, but it seemed like there was nothing much I could work with.

I sighed as I downed a glass of water and looked out of the window, which was within my peripheral vision while sitting on the dining table. The weather seemed to be quite pleasant and I could feel the urge to just roam around in such a nice weather.

The wind blew softly as I wondered how it would feel to just go to an undecided destination and get lost. Even for a small moment, if one could abandon all his identities, all his social statuses, and all questions like "Will I look like an idiot if I do this?" and just get lost in the wind, wouldn't it be great?

I looked away with a frown on my face, if I had wanted an escape now, why wasn't I doing anything to accomplish that escape? I had never felt restless or out of place, but now, all I felt was out of place. I was not meant to come here.

Japan had been kind to me, but it was all a disaster nevertheless. I kept remember my last encounter with Takumi, and what all had gone down. I was so happy, so bubbling with love, so content with my life.

And this was exactly what was unreal about it all.

Did Takumi sense my absence while I was away? Did he feel any remorse, any pain, any guilt, any emotion towards me? I checked my phone, he had tried to reach me via calls…

Well, I wanted to smile and be happy that at least he cared, but the more I thought about it, the more I dreaded meeting or talking to him.

The sooner I would meet him, the sooner would we be broken apart officially. I knew he was going to break up with me, and if he wouldn't, then I was going to break up with him.

The thought made my tears come up again—threatening to fall down any moment. I stood up and took my sling. Even though I knew it were to happen sooner or later, my selfish side wanted to keep him a bit longer…

Even if he wasn't mine.

I walked along the roads, on the sidewalks. There were trees on both sides, through which sunshine peeked. I was still hungry, and not in the mood of going to office. So I decided to head to some local markets and kill time instead.

Japanese fashion was just another world. If I hadn't felt so dead inside today, I would surely gone insane and shopped myself to death. But, all the pretty things, all the accessories, all the colors, all the things that I saw didn't appeal to me. I just walked across those shops with a Styrofoam cup of iced tea in my hand. I guess, when you aren't happy, even glitter turns to dust.

A café caught my eye and I decided to put an end to my hunger there. I sat down and ordered… looking around, I saw many couples occupying the tables. I looked away, I did not want to feel any more pathetic than I already did.

And why should I even be affected by it all? To be fair, it was just wine and dine on the surface, but shallow on the inside. We were never mutually, stupidly, madly in love.

But I was.

My order arrived and I stared at a plate of deliciously looking food sitting on my table. The waitress, who was dressed in a maid outfit, smiled kindly towards me and spoke, "Enjoy your meal." Which made me smile back too, in her direction. Maid cafes were strangely popular in Japan. This café, named Hello Kitty Café, was also a maid café, where all the workers dressed as Maids and Butlers. They also had a section where the customers were allowed to play with cats…strange, huh?

The phone ringtone alerted me of a call, I snapped out of my daze and unconsciously gripped my fork when I saw Takumi's picture flash on my screen. I could not leave the call unattended any longer, it had been five days…I could not hide anymore.

I felt tears brim in my eyes as I picked up the phone call with hesitation, my legs had lost their strength all together, what the fuck was happening to me?

His voice rang through my mind and shook my entire being as he spoke, "Mia?"

I sat up straight, for I had forgotten how to speak. It was getting hard to control myself, and I didn't want to be seen like a crying mess in public…

"Y-Yes. Speaking." I found my courage and my voice back, my nerves made my hands shiver and I poked my food with the fork, to get rid of all this nervous energy.

"Where have you been?" He asked, I could sense tiredness and hesitation in his voice. Perhaps he'd been working a lot.

I stuttered, "H-Home…"

"Will you see me today?" He asked, his voice gave nothing away but mine completely died in my throat. I felt hot tears trail down my face dramatically, as I almost laughed. What had I become?

"Mia?" I bet he questioned my sanity as he must have heard me laugh. More tears rolled off my chin and I could not handle this much longer… "I'll see you soon." I told him vaguely, as I cut the call and went to the washroom, to fix myself.

* * *

The Mercedes moved swiftly on the road as the night lights shone. Paris was at its best during the night. The French restaurants were lined up with people, there were so many tourists on the sidewalks. The city was truly brought to life.

She stared out of the window of her car as she adjusted her wrist watch. It had been a much unexpected visit, but it was for a good cause, so she had decided to come. The driver hummed a song in French as he drove, creating a soothing environment inside the car. She didn't speak much, for she had been engrossed in seeing the outside world.

There wasn't much time for sightseeing when you were working. Even if she travelled every week, it was mostly for work. At most, if she would have one or two hours free, she would spend them in relaxing instead.

The venue came close and she braced herself. The car drove inside the entrance area, which was lined up by people. She got out of the car with a smile on her face. The lights made her look like an angel with a perfect smile, but nobody dared to smile her way.

The chauffer lead her inside and she sat down on her designated spot. The anchors were hosting the event, and she was late. But at least she was able to make it in such short notice. She was greeted by different people, who had come from across the world, just like her. She smiled, and talked, and nodded along in conversations that she was subjected to.

"Now for the main event, to present the humanitarian of the year award, I would like to welcome upon the stage, the president of our foundation, Mr Edward Jameson." The audience applauded as a man, probably in his sixties, walked up the stage and stood proudly, with his head held high.

"She has been a distinguished persona from the start since she began her work in the field. She has been the source of hope and light for many, and a strong pillar for all. She has been a source of inspiration and a role model for the younger generation, especially girls. Today, I am proud to present the humanitarian award to her and I would like to congratulate her on opening her own firm, in the States. She comes from a normal country, and a normal family just like all of us, but Miss Ayuzawa chose to make a difference." He said proudly, "She has saved so many—from their worst nightmares, by becoming a nightmare for the wrongdoers herself" Many laughed at his comment, but then there was a silence.

"Nobody dare cross her path," He said with a nod, "I hope she continues doing such great work globally. She has worked in England, Haiti, Philippines, Africa, Japan, and now, she is taking her campaign to the United States. Please welcome her on the stage with a huge round of applause!"

She walked up with her head held high, as the audience applauded and praised her. She did not look down or look back or looking anywhere else as she walked towards the main stage. She did not stumble in such high heels and a business dress. There was silence on the stage when she stood, with all her might, and faced the audience. The crowd was dead silent as she stood next to the glass podium, on which a trophy stood, awaiting its mistress. The President looked at her in awe.

"Ever since I was young, I was against the mistreatment of women. I could not stand seeing anyone disrespect a woman. I have worked hard to accomplish what I am today, and I hope that I am able to inspire someone. The reason for my visit wasn't to come and grab another trophy, or award, no matter how important it was. I have always thought, that if I can inspire even a single person from a crowd of a thousand, then my life has a meaning. Thank you for your kind words, Mr Jameson." She finished her little speech with a small smile and the audience erupted into applauds. She gave another bright smile as she accepted the trophy and the crowd seemed to be in love with her.

"One last question," Mr Jameson spoke in a whisper as she moved away from the stage. "Shoot."

"What has been your aspiration in life, Miss Ayuzawa?"

She smiled as she held the trophy in her arms, "I have always felt a void in my heart, Mr Jameson. My goals changed throughout my life, but my aspiration has been only one—which was to be happy. Putting smiles on people's faces feeds my aspiration and fills that void. So, my aspiration in life, is to be happy." She said as she walked down, leaving an amazed man behind.

* * *

 **||READ||REVIEW||FAVORITE||FOLLOW||**

 **Review Corner:** Upon much requests, I'm bringing back the section where I reply to all the reviews. Some of you say I've changed, well, I haven't I promise. I'll reply to the reviews out here.

Guest chapter 12 . May 27

Hey! Hahaha! I felt so funny when I saw your review. There was soooooo much hate for Mia, but I totally get it! I mean, I wrecked the cannon ship didn't I?! But don't worry, its going to get better… Thanks for your wishes, I did well and I hope the internship doesn't break me :D Pun intended! Thank you so much for your kind words. I will never forget my fans and my stories.

anindya956 chapter 12 . May 27

Hey! I know right, Love is a dangerous aphrodisiac, it flips people. After reading the reviews, even I am very excited for their encounter. Even though I am the writer LOL…Thank you for your wishes!

Samara16 chapter 12 . May 27

Thank you! For one normal review! At least you were able to catch my drift! Haahah! Exactly, who wouldn't fall for him!? And that **_is_** true, nothing is more painful than unrequited love. Much love!

Patricia Walker chapter 12 . May 27

Hey! I hope you liked this chapter, it wasn't as spicy as I expected but it was alright, I think. Thank you for your wishes! I hope I can inspire people and I hope I can continue writing and stuff…heh. Even though I don't want to take a break from writing, it seems like I'm gonna have to…

Leopio chapter 12 . May 27

OOOH My! Well, allow me to explain. Mia didn't necessarily fall for his wealth. If you read the story carefully, you'll find that she was always in awe of his persona and always intrigued by him. She wanted to know more, and in the process of accomplishing so, she fell for him. But I'm happy to read what you would have done if you were Mia.

Putriaryx chapter 12 . May 28

Hey! I think I was do what you wanted in this chapter huh? And I hope this chapter length was okay :D

Guest chapter 12 . May 28

Yes! One sane review again! Thank you for understanding what I was trying to convey. Sheesh!

AroggantIgnorant045 chapter 12 . May 28

Your excitement was so contagious LOL Yeah she is coming! :D

titaniascarlet4444 chapter 12 . May 28

I was so moved by your review. I live for such reviews, girl. Although I have already replied to your review in a pm, I couldn't contain myself, don't cry! I'll try to make you happy in the forthcoming chapters…Thanks! Much Love!

Stella chapter 12 . May 28

Hey! I have mentioned a bit about my book down there. Thanks for the review! Much love!

Minniemiss123 chapter 12 . May 29

While yes your review was quite long, I thoroughly enjoyed reading it! :D I like this side of you, you should talk about life more with me,. Geez, you never offend me! So chill and say what you wish to me… Why don't you make an account? You'll understand more about Takumi and Gerard. Please see them in a mature perspective. Family does stick together through thick and thin. As for Mia…I think you'll understand when this story ends…Love changes people and makes them do stupid things, girl. Anyways, I loved your review, :D

Takumisa17 chapter 12 . Jun 1

Thanks for the encouragement~

 **Blabbing Corner:** Hey guys. How has life been treating you? Well mine is in shambles as I speak, courtesy of the hell that my mind has created. I feel like I've been suppressing my emotions so much that even a simple event in my life triggers an outrage.

By the way, I'm sure you guys must be wondering what my real name is and where I am from. _Why don't you mention which country I might belong to, according to what all you know about me?_ It would be fun!

I have some time left on me, perhaps a day or two, which I'm going to dedicate to writing and will try to get back on my flow, so that you guys can enjoy. Sheesh! My internship starts from the 6th, and my exams end on 5th…We'll be working for 10-11hours a day and its going to be intense as hell! So I think I wouldn't be able to update ( D; ) Goddamn, I have so many fic ideas written on my notepad. I have at least 10 more fics waiting to be written, and two stories (Ups and Downs, APOF) that don't even get the chance to be updated. I'm trying my best to write as much MFUH as I can…please forgive me.

 **About My Book:** My book is going to be titled "Self Sufficient Woman", I intend to bring forward the idea of what phases a girl goes through during her growth throughout life. I will take scenarios out of my life and from the life of the people I've seen throughout life, and the people I've been inspired from, to bring forth what I have to share with the world.

I admit, I haven't figured the entire thing out. But I will keep on telling more and more as I progress with the book, which is going to take a lot of time, because of my schedule. Thank you for your kind wishes and reviews. ( ;D )

 **||~MISS~KIREI~||**


	14. Chapter 14

**||~MISS~KIREI~||**

* * *

 **Chapter 14: The hole in my heart**

 _Blink_

 _Blink_

 _Blink_

 _Kanou Soutaro looked at the body lying before him in horror. He was running out of time. If she were to wake up now, he would never be able to get the job done. He had to get the job done. What would he say to Takumi then?_

 _His hands started to shake and he couldn't concentrate. The blood terrified him, which wasn't unnatural considering his fear of females and his weakness being blood. Blood was why he had chosen to become a psychologist instead of a proper, full-fledged doctor. He pinched the bridge of his nose and took off his specs as he tried to concentrate and align his chakras. His hands stopped shaking and he got to work as he took another injection and drew more of the drug which he normally used for hypnosis._

 _He had been working on a drug that, if reached its full potential, could assist in hypnosis and could go as far as brainwashing people. Well, not necessarily_ brainwashing _but more like twisting the truth. He could twist someone's memories, and modify, edit, or delete them if he succeeded in developing the drug. Five years of hard work and a very thorough knowledge of organic chemistry helped him develop this drug, "the CP04", to what it was today. Although it wasn't perfect, it was still pretty strong. The test results showed a success rate of 70%, which was substantially more than what the existing medicine had._

 _He pulled her wrist and searched for her vein in her arm, as he held the injection carefully. The drug had hallucinogenic effects, which were only going to help Misaki, since she was in so much pain._

 _He hated being the person who had to do this to her. Even if he had despised her in the start, Misaki had grown on him. She inspired him to be better and to work hard with the best of his capability. And now, he was doing something to her which was just plain backstabbing._

 _Kanou gathered some courage while Misaki's breaths got normal and he saw her body relax. He picked up the piece of paper that Takumi had left for him and began to read._

 _His heart broke as he continued to read on further, and he had almost reached a point where he could not continue to read anymore, but Kanou could not stop now. For he had to become the one to make it all come true._

 _He looked at Misaki contemplatively as she lay half dead to the world. He wondered, what kind of hallucination must she be experiencing at the moment? He had hoped it wasn't a depressing one._

 _Now, he had the power to turn Misaki's life upside down. It was up to him to decide how much she would remember, and what would become of her. He set the piece of paper down as he took his specs off, beginning his work in a smooth, confident and calm voice._

 _"_ _Misaki, now listen to me carefully. I want you to concentrate fully on the sound of my voice…and feel your breaths coming in and going out of your body…"_

* * *

I could not hide from everything any longer.

After what seems like ages and ages of effort and unmotivation, I picked my shattered pieces from the ground and found the courage to get up. The colours had seemed to fade away and everything was just…grey. I decided to lock my thoughts far away and let everything be just as it was. Nothing worse could happen now. The worst part was over, and now anything that was bound to happen, hopefully was not going to hurt me as much as the initial days did.

With this little hope in my mind, I got ready for work.

A faded saffron dress seemed to match my mood perfectly. My blank face looked better to me than my always-acting-like-a-little-girl face. I felt myself mature over this span of a few days more than I ever had in my entire life. I picked up my laptop and keys, and got the fuck out of my room before it swallowed me into its nothingness again. I could not afford to fall back into the pit of absurdity again, not at the cost of my sanity.

Everyone seemed to be staring at me intently when they noticed me step out. I hadn't seen Aaron, Ian and Satomi in five days. They didn't speak anything though they did look bewildered and stared at me as if I had grown two heads.

It was a peculiar feeling.

I felt like I was being constantly watched as I plated my breakfast which the cook had prepared. It felt weird to me. It was like I was imagining voices, laughing at me, making fun of me, fun of my weaknesses. But as soon as I looked up, there was nothing.

Was I hallucinating?

I got back to my own devices and sat down on the dining table. There was fruit in my plate, and I was glad. I still couldn't shake the earlier feeling though. I didn't like it at all. Was I really so pathetic that I was being laughed at, by my own friends?

Was this high school all over again?

No. I realized I couldn't let this feeling eat me up now. Yes, I had behaved immaturely. Yes, I was childish. Yes, I was stupid. But now, I wanted to put it past me. Yes, I am weird, but, I couldn't just cocoon up till I died.

I got up from my chair abruptly, and the chair got dragged back as I stood straight and placed my palm on the table firmly.

"Mia?" I heard a few voices and felt faces with some strange expression staring at me, watching my every move. A rush of dizziness came over me as I decided to leave, but Satomi held my arm, scaring me in the process.

"Sit down and eat your food, Mia." She said sternly. I could feel the tense environment build up around me, so I decided to do as I was said. Nobody spoke another word to me and I just picked up my spoon again.

I felt an unpleasant wave run through my entire being as I remembered I had to go to an office in a few minutes. Even though I did make up my mind in my room a few moments ago. I felt my resolve weaken as Takumi's face came through my mind. I imagined him, not sitting in his office, in a formal attire, looking all serious. No, I imagined him to be something quite different. Something that I was sure he could never be.

I imagined him sitting by the beach, in a long, comfortable chair, with a book in his hand, his hair messed up and an unforgettable smile on his face.

But, the Takumi I knew, differed far from my imagination.

I wondered about the real Takumi, the one I met that fateful night, the one who the fake Takumi had trapped inside and almost killed. Would the real Takumi be like the one I imagined? Would he sit peacefully by the beach, reading a book, waiting for…" _Misa"?_

Oh god…not my thoughts again…

I gripped my spoon as tears threatened to fall. No. no. no. no. no. no.

No!

I could not afford to fall apart again.

At least not like this,

Not in front of everyone.

I got up and forced out a smile, "I'll wait in the car." I told them and left, calculating the amount of time I was left with, to fix myself before everyone came out.

* * *

I'd stopped trying to bring her back.

For she would return without even a word, in the faintest of my memories no matter how hard I tried erasing them. In my dreams and my nightmares, all the same. She would blow me away without even a knock, she would turn me upside down, and have me spinning across the room, with my head in my hands, and my sanity at her mercy. She would look down upon me, and laugh. I would imagine her cursing me out loud, saying that this was my punishment.

She would tauntingly say, _"You really loved my face, didn't you Takumi? Then this is your punishment, you'll fall in love with all of my faces that you'll see in other women, but you would never find me in them."_ she would continue to laugh, and laugh, and laugh…until the laughter would become a painful cry, and there would be tears…tears covering her entire face…turning into blood…streaming down her neck…making her yellow dress dirty…the dress she had come to love so much…so much…

I'm sorry…I'm sorry…I would repeat over and over and over…I would scream out to the entire world if she would listen…but my cries fall deaf upon my own ears…I find myself calling out her name every now and then—in my dreams, while I sleep, or read a book, or while I work, or walk. The two syllables of her name are stuck inside my throat, and they don't come out of my system no matter how many times I call her name. No matter how many times I tried to kill those two syllables, no matter how many times I burn my throat with alcohol and suffocate myself. I can't rest my body without uttering her name at least once in a day. It's the only way I find my sleep, somehow.

 _"_ _Mi..sa"_ I breathe out and feel strange as the words flow out of my mouth the moment I open it. I'm thankful to be left alone by the world, where I can say her name as much as I like, to my heart's content. I feel a sigh of relief surge through me as I run a hand through my hair. I know it myself, this has to be stopped, but I can't stop it—not without stopping my own heartbeat with it.

I've stopped trying to bring her back, for she comes back herself…without caution…without warning…Misa…a sigh of relief…a surge of comfort…Misa…making everything okay…I remember Mia's cries when she saw what she shouldn't have seen. I see pain in her eyes…I knew she was too innocent…I didn't want to taint her. I wanted to move forward in the future with a clean slate…but she comes back herself…without even a word…without even a warning. Misa…ruining everything.

The glass I had been gripping broke as my inner self revolted against my entire being…Misa…ruining everything? No…no…this isn't right…

Nothing was right.

I had to correct a few wrongs, and do myself a favour… Its been so long, so long since I'd seen a glimpse of my entire self…but now that I did, thanks to Mia Kirei, I want it back. I want to go back to my old self. Because I've been running away for so long…so long…its been five years…and I haven't lived a single day since.

"Mr Walker?"

I have to make things right…I cannot live under this curse any longer…

"Mister Walker?"

Japanese.

Who is speaking Japanese in Britain? Curiosity fuels me as I feel the urge to look up and move away from my thoughts…I look up… in hopes, could it be?

No, its not her. Its definitely not her. I remember now. I am in Japan…Yes, that's right. I came here to put the company back on its feet…yes… I have to correct all the wrongs…

I nod droopily. I hope the person doesn't find out I've been drinking. I can't recognize their face…who is it? I don't care…I almost laugh.

No voice comes, and I get back to my own musings…its probably morning now…I didn't realize I was up all night. I find my glass on the table again, and fill myself another…

"Mi…sa"

* * *

I nervously picked up my cell phone. It was now, or never. I had made my mind up, and I was going to see the end of it. My fingers shook as I tapped his name and dialled the number. I hadn't seen him all day in the office, and I was also informed that the company was on the verge of being shut down because of a government order. Everyone was working hard, at their maximum potential…I knew, Takumi was too.

He picked up the call and there was hesitation in his voice. My voice came out clear even though it broke inside. I told him I would see him when his workload lessens…he was understanding about it. Not many words were exchanged but I guess the message was clear. I said only as much as I could.

With the tightening feeling in my heart, I cut the call…knowing that the inevitable was near.

* * *

Dusk falls upon the land, orange and yellow hues paint the scene with such artistic strokes; the wind hums its favourite lullaby, one that speaks of goodbye…Goodbye to another day. I drag my feet away from the bright white lights and the smell of stale coffee and rain. It had been another hectic day. Another day filled with corporate uproar. Everyone seemed frantic, and working with the best of their abilities. I've been working for eighteen hours straight, and now it's the evening of another day. I stare at the mirror the moment I reach home, I need to fix myself.

A face wash, change of clothes, and a glass of juice later, I head out. I took the keys from Aaron and now I'm on my way to Takumi's house. I feel better now, since I have refreshed myself and cried so much that there aren't any more tears left for me to shed…

With my resolve of steel, I step on the gas pedal as I get out of the accommodation complex where I temporarily live. I hadn't touched a steering wheel in weeks, and it felt so good to drive again. As I drove through the busy streets of Tokyo that transitioned into the quiet neighbourhood as I drove by. My hands began to shake as I thought about facing him. It had been a week since I stormed out of his house. But now, I didn't want to run anymore. Even though a huge part of me was scared, vulnerable, and didn't want to do it, I still came.

I had to settle everything between us once and for all. I was going to let him go completely, for it would be morally wrong to cling on to someone who was already in love with somebody else. I could not do it. I could not.

Because I knew I couldn't make him love me more than he already loved " _Misa"_ I had seen him be so real to me that night. The pain I saw in his eyes could never be overshadowed by stoicism that he fooled the world with.

My thoughts were going in the wrong direction again.

I decided to give myself another chance as I took a deep breath and cleared my thoughts. I was not going to dwell any further until Takumi himself tells me the truth. The gates of the mansion were in my sight as I pulled over. His guards seemed to have recognized me and let me inside.

I drove over inside and got out of the car at the entrance. The maid opened the doors for me as I got inside and smiled at her gently, I figured I didn't have to behave bad to people who didn't even know what was going on in my mind, so I put up a big smile as I went inside.

Takumi wasn't home yet.

I should have called him first, I think as I seat myself in the living room which was lined with large sofa seats on the sides. There were magazines placed on the glass table in the middle of the room, which sported a beautiful vase of freshly cut flowers. I picked up the magazines, only to find them disinteresting. For my mind kept circling back to the moments I'd spent here in this house, and the events that followed.

Even though I tried really hard to let go of the thoughts that only served as poison to my broken self, I could not get past the fact that I still hadn't discovered what that strange bedroom housed. Things went by so fast that I didn't get a chance to ask Takumi.

Well, I did have a lot of things that I wanted to ask him, but I had very little enthusiasm for getting out of my room that gave comfort to my tired self.

I wanted to know.

I needed to know.

My legs moved on my own as I got up from the seat, I left my purse and my phone right there, since I could not come to care anymore. I had this innate want…to _know,_ and I figured, from my past experiences with Takumi, that if I just sat here thinking that a day would come when he would just open up to me himself and tell me everything I wanted to know, nothing was going to happen.

For I had to make a move myself if I needed to know, that was just how it had always been with him.

My mind had carefully memorized the path that led to that bedroom door, the door which possibly had all the answers I wanted. The door that would probably either break me up completely, or it would serve as a panacea. But I doubt it would be the former.

Regardless! I could not go back now. I had to know this to ensure my sanity! I reached the hallway on the second floor that was going to lead to that door, I had no problems locating it. The mahogany door came in my sight and I stepped towards it. My heartbeat sped as I stared at the door contemplatively, I felt fear grip my heart—what if I should not open it?

But fuck that, my mind screamed and I forgot my morals the moment I held the doorknob and twisted it. My resolve strengthened with every step I took inside the spacious bedroom.

I was speechless.

The room was beautiful.

Don't get me wrong, every room was pretty elegant in here but this particular room seemed to stand out. Lined up with shades of crème and blush, it had a subtle beauty to itself. The four post bed with simple yet elegant and the transparent white curtains made it more scenic. I could imagine the wind blowing softly, the curtains would dance to the rhythm of the wind and the wind chimes would sing a beautiful lullaby. There was a walk-in-closet, an attached bathroom which sported a huge bathtub in the centre with scented candles lined on its outline…the list of luxuries in the room were endless, but I couldn't have cared less…for I had been looking for something else.

I was getting way too ahead of myself. I kept looking around, and started to notice subtle things that indicated me the possible owner of this room… I seemed to have missed the most prominent things that stood out in this particular room.

Pictures.

On the walls.

The room was large, hence it had a lot of space that was put to good use by lining up a love seat, and a glass table. A few steps ahead lead to a small hallway that split up into an attached bathroom, a walk in closet and a balcony on the other side. The other side of the room sported transparent paper thin curtains that separated the four post bed. But one prominent thing that I could see were pictures, on all the walls.

Takumi's young face wasn't hard to recognize. I saw him, holding a night blue coloured cat with a pained expression on his face. Could it be his pet? There were many more pictures, of several other people I could not recognize. I saw a group of maids, standing together with a welcoming smile and a banner that read "Have a safe trip master~!" another with a girl, standing awkwardly with two more girls, wearing a school uniform. Perhaps his school friends?

As I moved towards the inside of the room where the bed was located, the pictures seemed to get more personal. Takumi's face had an innocent and young beauty to it that seemed to have gotten lost along the way. He was probably in his teenage or young adult years when these pictures were taken…probably twenty or so… as the pictures with unrecognizable faces changed with every couple of steps that I took, the face of a raven haired girl started becoming more prominent in pictures and I could see her in every single one of them.

He looked happier.

With her.

The pain in my heart increased with every picture that I saw. It became apparent to me that the girl in the pictures was probably…

"Misa"

I stood frozen as realizations began to hit me like blades of ice piercing my heart, one by one. For a moment, I had forgotten to breathe and my body had too—because the next moment—I was numb. My hand flew up to my head and I ran my fingers along the length of my hair, I could feel wetness in my eyes and the loss of voice in my throat. I tentatively walked towards the picture hung up on the wall and placed my hand on the photograph. My palm seemed to cover the long length of her hair completely and I realized that if she had short hair, _she would look just like me._

 _"_ _I must warn you"_

 _"_ _I have cleaned up a lot of …Mess that he didn't intend to make. I do not know how to voice my concerns, but please, Miss, I can see that my master has taken a liking towards yourself,"_

I remember echoes in my mind, repeating the same words over and over again. I remember ignoring them, and ignoring the obvious signs that I had in front of me.

 _"_ _But you must be aware that I know how it ends, and you must look before you fall. It might end up ugly, and it would be heart wrenching for me, since you're such an admirable lady,"_

 _"You're just like her,"_

We are so _"alike"_.

 _"…_ _and I can see why master would adore you, you're different than the other ones despite the resemblance,"_

I do not know what to think anymore.

 _"_ _You're just his type."_

I wasn't his type…I just happened to look like her.

 _"_ _When I say that you're his 'type', I don't mean that you're sweet and pretty. I mean, something else. He always goes for the same kind of women—raven hair, amber eyes. I've seen some women that he has dated before, they all have the same characteristics—same hair colour, height, features. I don't know why but it doesn't feel like a coincidence anymore. It's like he has some strange preference."_

Its not a preference, is it? Its his inability to move on. Its his urge to circle back to the same face. Its rooted deep within his soul…its not his choice…its inherent.

 _"_ _He never puts any effort for his women. Behind every romantic gesture is actually an order that he threw on Cedric's face. I'm not saying that he doesn't reciprocate their feelings, but it feels like he doesn't care much. I want you to be protected from that. When I first saw you, I knew inside that if he were single, you'd be the one."_

I feel a bout of laughter come off my chest as I stare at the pictures with tears in my eyes. How could I have been so stupid, so delusional, so naïve?

 _"_ _I'm not saying that he doesn't love you, I'm saying that if you were to leave, there is a good chance he won't be affected by it. I've seen Takumi Walker in action, it takes him a good wine bottle to get over a relationship, but the girls he breaks up with are left for Cedric to handle. That man leads a perfect life, Mia. A life which is much different than yours or mine."_

He wouldn't be affected.

I remembered words being thrown at me in an endearing attempt to save me from this fall. I remember brushing them all aside, because I was the fool in love who was blinded off by the light that he seemed to emit. I did not realize the light that I was drawn to—like a hopeless moth, didn't belong to Takumi.

For he was the epitome of darkness—a star that burnt too bright, along with the love of his life, and now—only ashes of what was once remained.

Amidst my musings, and the sound of my heart breaking, I became deaf and blind to the events that took place. I did not recognize the sound of violent rain pour out, I did not realize that the windows were open, I did not listen to the sound of the wind chimes, violently crashing into one another.

When I snapped out of my reverie, and saw that the floor was getting wet, I ran to the windows to close the glass panes. I did not want this…safe haven that Takumi made for…for…

I just didn't want it to be ruined.

I closed the windows as let out a sigh, forgetting my emotional pain for a while. I did not realize that my white blouse was now wet and that I was entirely soaked within fractions of the second. The rain was heavy and I pacified myself, thinking that maybe…just maybe the sky would weep for me like it must have wept for Takumi and his Misa. I had assumed that they had been separated, but I could not understand why or how Takumi could not get her back. By all means, he was a powerful man who could turn the world upside down with a flick of his hand.

It was a puzzle I was not ready to solve.

I sat down on the floor, not wanting to wet the beautiful pieces of furniture scattered all around the room. My eyes skimmed and found a bookshelf sitting silently near the sofa seat. I smiled bitterly—stupidly, it seemed that wherever Takumi would go, his books would follow.

I saw a particularly thick book, which seemed to have thick pages—stand out amongst the other members of the book shelf. Upon further inspection, I realized that it was a picture book. But before I could let my curiosity get the best of me and overshadow the raging pain inside my heart, I heard the creak of the mahogany bedroom door and heard a deep voice that belong to a man.

"You wouldn't want to open that."

* * *

 **||READ||REVIEW||FAVORITE||FOLLOW||**

* * *

 **!~MISS~KIREI~!**

Hey Guys! How are all of you doing? I didn't get much time to work upon this chapter and I had to deprive myself of sleep to update it but I'm okay~~~! I'm going to keep this A/N short and save the blabbering part for my next update where I'll tell you where I've been and what "Ups and Downs" I've been going through lately! Let me know how this chapter turned out and remember: **Your reviews make my day.**

 **Let's quickly answer the reviews from the last time now!**

 **rosexx**

Goodamn, Thank you so much. And I know right! Misaki took thirteen chapters to appear, she arrived "fashionably late" HA! I'm grateful to you. Its because of readers like you that I find the strength to write, update and cheer myself up when I'm down.

 **Samara16**

Thank you so much! I shall blabb more about myself in the next update so wait for that!

 **Patricia Walker**

HA! I knew someone would catch that maid latte reference, but I figured it'd be too cliché and obvious if Mia reached the same café as the one in which Misaki worked. By all means I had wanted this story to be as unconventional and non-stereotypical as possible therefore my plot twists wouldn't be very predictable if this story. I hope you liked this chapter!

 **amber83**

How do you like the cliffhanger from this chapter! HA! Just kidding, its not like I want to have cliffhangers all the time, sometime it just happens on its own…the story flows out through me—I am merely a channel of my inner writer demon :P I was so happy to read your review but you should read other works too. But I'd be lying if I said that your review didn't boost my confidence! You actually liked my Takumi!

 **Unknown**

Thank you so much! I'm trying to get through my internship without dying. I'd be lying if I said that It isn't challenging, but its fun to stretch yourself I guess. Anyway, I can't wait to be back and updating.

 **anindya956**

Hey! Thanks for the wishes! And high five, I am single too…I mean, read my content, who would want to date a dark soul like me? Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter!

 **Putriaryx**

I think a promise of forever will take some time to be updated but I shall try my best!

 **ArrogantIgnorant045**

To be honest, I was quite happy to read your review. I was happy that I got my message across, happy to have shared something that I think happens with a lot of us but isn't spoken about—yes, I mean girls like Mia. Anyway, I know Misaki can never be replaced in Takumi's life but we'll she what happens next.

 **MinnieMiss123**

You have made a great point, as always. Why isn't Takumi seen in the same light as Mia? It is indeed a question to ponder upon and I shall use my free time to whip something up that would justify Takumi's character. Did you like this chapter!? Tell me all about it.

 **Padfoot Starfyre**

I think you have misunderstood the chapter a bit, Mia did not go to Paris found nd/or encountered Misaki. Misaki was in a conference in the good ol Parii, but Mia is back in Tokyo, discovering the pieces of Takumi's heart.

 **Takumisa17**

Thank you!

 **Skye**

HAHAHAHA

 **Guest**

Hello there! Welcome to my story world! Haha, should I call it that? I was quite happy to read your review and it certainly cheered me up when I was down. To be honest, I had been having a rough couple of weeks, if you follow this story you must be knowing from my A/N about my personal life and how I don't have an abundance of time to update and write. Anyway, you review was unexpected and I loved your acknowledgment to reading my stories. Thank you!


	15. Chapter 15

**||~MISS~KIREI~||**

* * *

 **Chapter 15: Welcome To My Fucked Up Heart**

"You wouldn't want to open that." A thick voice rang through the air as I froze in my spot, the thick book in my hands slipped and dropped down on the floor as I turned around—realising my worst fears with every movement of my body. Takumi was going to kill me.

Well I was probably exaggerating this a little bit. He wouldn't kill me, but I know that he would be angry as hell and—

That's not Takumi.

He looked as surprised as I did when I turned around and faced him. Who was this person? Why was he in this particular room, telling me not to touch anything?

I didn't know to say, he just stood there—shocked. I could not understand at first. Was there something on me that freaked him out too much? Okay, I do understand that I had been crying and I must look like a mess right now. But nobody would get so shocked to see a crying girl like he did.

He regained his composure when he realized he had been spaced out for more than ten seconds now. I stepped back as I finally realized. Of course it took me this much time to realize. I think if I were to get to know the people who were actually close to Takumi, I would have to get used to people getting shocked after looking at me.

It wasn't my face that shocked them.

It was my _face—_ and the fact that my face resembled with someone else.

"To clarify, I'm not Misa." I told him with a blank smile. His eyes widened as he seemed to remember his mannerisms.

"Oh, uh-of course. I'm sorry for my previous behaviour. I would like to start over." He said as he cleared his throat and extended a hand—"I'm Dr Kanou Soutaro, and you are?"

I looked at him without trying to freak out. He said nothing about 'Misa', but extended a friendly handshake towards me. I shook his hand hesitantly and bowed, "Kirei." I told him my last name, not wanting to tell him that my name was Mia—which was one letter short of the name 'Misa' which would have turned out to be messy, considering his reaction earlier. This exchange somehow increased the mystery behind the name 'Misa'. Who was Misa? Where was she now? Was she missing? Is that what made him freak out so bad? Or worse, was she… dead? That would explain him freaking out so bad when he looked at me. My heart hammered in my chest as I thought about all these messed up things and this room somehow gave off a chilly aura with every such thought. My mind raced back to Takumi…

Oh dear, how much had he been through?

"Kirei-san?" He acknowledged me as he looked at me—expecting me to say something. I could only hope that he was not judging me right now…

"Yes, I take that you're a friend of Takumi's?" I say, hesitantly.

"You're right. What about you?" he asked as he looked at me. I forced a smile as I nodded, "I'm his—

Friend. Yeah, we're friends." I laughed as I tried to lessen out the awkward atmosphere. What was I supposed to say anyway…I don't think calling myself Takumi's girlfriend would have been correct…not anymore.

"Why don't we…" He said as he motioned me to come out of the room, "Why don't we talk in the living room, yeah?"

"Sure." I said with a smile as I stepped out of the room and he locked it. He seemed to be too familiar with this place. More than a friend would.

He sat down comfortably on the sofa seat in the living room. "Karen? Would you bring out some tea for the two of us? Kirei-san, I think you would enjoy chamomile tea?"

I looked at this man awkwardly, how was he so comfortable in this house? and even knew the name of the head maid. Worse, how did he know which tea I would like?

"How did you know?" I said out loud, not being able to hide my surprise any longer. He chuckled, "I'm a psychologist…Its my job to read people."

"Wow" I say, I wish I could read faces…I wish I could have seen through Takumi's façade…

"In thirty seconds, Takumi is going to be here. Why don't you take my card and we can meet later where you can ask me all the questions running through your mind?" Kanou smiled as he extended his card and placed it in front of me. I sat dumbfounded and took the card to put it in my purse when Takumi walked inside the living room.

My eyes widened as Kanou merely stood up and smiled in his direction, "We were expecting you."

Takumi pursed his lip, never smiling as usual, as he nodded. "I was in a meeting."

"Of course," Kanou smiled, "Why don't I wait for you in the study?"

"Sure" Takumi said as he put his things down on the table. I could not look straight at him without breaking down. So I didn't. He looked the same as always—wearing a fitted onyx jacket over a pale peach shirt and denims. He'd considered this casual wear.

He looked tired.

And he was expecting me to say something. I clutched the hem of my dress and couldn't help but feel my heart race. He was looking straight at me and I was speechless.

"How are y—"

"Good…Good! I mean…I'm going great." I said as I felt laughter coming out of my mouth. "What about you?" I tried to look straight at him and maintain some sort of eye contact with him. He was taken aback by this gesture for some reason. He ran a hand through his hair, "I've been better—there's a lot of things going on."

"Someone breached the employee records, right? But I still wonder what happened with an employee that made them go to a human rights lawyer?" I said. Yes. A healthy work related talk was the way to go. Suddenly we didn't have anything else in common anymore.

"I don't know either. The lawyer is adamant that we close off this branch as we do not have a healthy "Employer-Employee" relationship established. There were claims of sexual assault and—", Takumi pinched the bridge of his nose irritably, "Mia, why are we having this sort of conversation?"

So my tactic didn't work at all…huh…

"I think we should meet sometime later…" I said as I picked up my things. I was not comfortable with his friend being in the next room and all.

"I'll call you, Takumi." I smile as I stood up, but he stood right in front of me with an unreadable expression on his face. "How long will we keep going in circles like this?" He said as he tilted his neck and looked at me. I knew that he probably wanted to talk and get this over with, but I just…

"I can't talk about it until I can wrap my head around all this…mess." I confess, "I thought I was ready and…"

"It's time we faced the truth." I said, "I'll wait for you to open up and…"

"Mia, there is nothing to be told," He said as he held me by the shoulders, "This is all a big misunderstanding. I don't cheat, Kirei."

"I want to know about Misa." I said as my mind wandered off to what I'd seen moments ago. The flashes come back violently and I feel numb again…

He is speechless.

"Even though nothing works out between us…I want to know about Misa." I tell him, he's retreated his arms and they're no longer on my shoulders, I feel wetness under my eyes and I'm sure they're tears.

"Ja, ne. Takumi-kun." I walk away from his embrace, from his scent and his presence, out of his house and I see Cedric standing at the door with a sad look on his face. His words come back to my mind and I shook my head as I wiped my tears. He nods sympathetically, "Let me take you home, Miss."

I couldn't say no.

The ride was filled with silence. I placed my hands in my lap and looked out. It was still raining violently. I slid down the windows and let the raindrops hit me. It was strange and calming…

"Have you ever seen her?" I said out loud, catching Cedric off guard. He played Cleopatra throughout the journey in the music system. "I have."

I looked out at the rain. The trees danced with the wind and many leaves detached from the branches. A sakura tree stood by the road as it shed out the petals due to the wild rain… "Have you seen her since?"

Since…since what? Since their separation, I guess?

"Not quite." Cedric said and I sat back, dissatisfied with his answer. The rain continued to pour and I stared off to somewhere…wanting to be anywhere other than this mess.

* * *

Five years ago,

Igarashi seemed to have lost the signature smirk on his face the moment Takumi stood on his doorstep at 3am in the morning. In fact, he had forgotten how to smirk, scowl or show any sort of reaction when Takumi opened his mouth to speak.

He found the energy to speak moments later, when Takumi finished speaking. He had given him a shirt to wear, since his own had been covered in blood and he looked like a murderer. Even though Tora had wanted to make a joke about it, he couldn't.

"I still cannot believe that of all the people, you chose me."

Takumi chuckled, out of nowhere. His forest green irises intimidated Tora in the pale moonlit sky. They stood on Tora's roof. "Its not like I wouldn't come to know if you tried some sort of thing with her." Takumi said in a dead serious voice.

Tora sighed, "Don't you trust me?"

"Not after you tried to rape her back in high school." Takumi said, staring at the filled glass of whiskey sitting in his hand. Tora's glass, on the other hand, was empty.

"And you still chose to remember that over all the good things that I've done? I even helped you meet her. I took her to England for god's sake, just so that you could see her. God, I must've been stupid to do that." Tora smirked as he refilled his glass.

"You dared to kiss her in front of me" Takumi glared and Tora smiled, "It was just a gift for me."

"Well she's not a toy."

"I know." Tora said, more seriously this time, "What do you want me to do?"

"Keep her away from me." the reply came.

Tora almost spat his whiskey out. Was he out of his mind?

"Are you fucking insane? She will hunt you out, you bastard! Do you think she would stop after realizing what Gerard tried to pull off?! This is not the time to act like a fucking cunt, you loser! Fight for her!"

Takumi's eyes widened, how could Tora Igarashi, the man who wanted to own Ayuzawa so bad, say such words?

"You don't realize the depths Gerard can go to have her out of the way."

"Takumi, what the fuck happened to you!?" Tora held him by the collar, breaking the glass of whiskey in the process, Takumi sighed. "I'm not stupid, I'm being logical."

"Misaki will never forgive you!" Tora said violently, "Do you want me to punch some sense into you?!"

"Misaki will never know." Takumi smiled as he ran a hand through his hand.

Tora's eyes widened, "What do you mean?"

"Kanou is going to alter her memories." Takumi said as he stood up. "Consider this a chance for you to redeem yourself. Just keep her away from The Walkers."

"Keep her away from Takumi Walker and his family."

Tora stared back at Takumi with widened eyes, he knew he should have been happy to hear that he could sweep Misaki off her feet and show her how good of a man he could be, but he could feel nothing but sadness in his heart.

"Its time you and I switched roles." Takumi said as he took the glass of whiskey from Tora and patted his shoulder with a smile on his face, "Please take care of the love of my life. I'll be forever indebted to you."

Takumi bowed with a small smile that did not reach his eyes, "But if you tried something." His smile faded, "Consider it the last day of your life."

"This is one fucked up mess." Tora said as he regained his composure

"Welcome to my fucked up heart." Takumi laughed and gulped the entire glass down.

* * *

 **READ REVIEW FAVORITE FOLLOW**

 **(Author's Note in the next chapter)**

 **||~MISS~KIREI~||**


	16. Chapter 16

**||~MISS~KIREI~||**

* * *

 **Chapter 16: A new beginning?**

 ** _Five years ago_**

 _"_ _Misaki, now listen to me carefully. I want you to concentrate fully on the sound of my voice…and feel your breaths coming in and going out of your body… Feel your body relax and concentrate on your body. I want you to feel your heart beating steadily and your body functioning peacefully… If you understand what I'm saying, please lift your right thumb so that I can know…okay, that's good. Okay, Misaki. Today I'm going to talk about a few things with you that you may or may not be familiar with. I'm sure some of them may come off absurd to you, but it will be okay once you recover. You were in a hit and run. You badly injured yourself, and forgot a few things…but that's okay. I'm here to make you remember. Born to Minako and Sakuya Ayuzawa, you, Misaki Ayuzawa were always a cheerful child. You always work hard to the best of your abilities and always strive hard to be the best at whatever you do. You carried this quality forward and shone in high school, when times were rough… You worked part time in Maid Latte, a café, where you made a lot of good memories and friends such as Satsuki, Erika, Honoka, Subaru, Aoi, and everyone else. You also made another friend, Takumi Usui, who was also your rival. You both competed in various fields and it was more like a friendly competition. Usui Takumi was a strange personality and he pushed your buttons sometimes, causing you to get annoyed, but it was all just playful banter. After your father's disappearance, you had grown cold towards men and had trouble trusting them. Usui Takumi helped you regain your trust in men. He also helped you in various other occasions like the school festival. When your father returned back, he also helped you forgive your father and your family was one again…"_

 _Kanou pursed his lips as he readied himself to say these words. He felt his energy being drained at 4 am in the morning, but this was an important task, he was going to finish this job in three sessions, taken every night when Misaki was in her REM state. He could not bombard her with so much information at once, so he had decided to do three sessions with her. The complicated machinery scattered all around Misaki's bed would have scared anyone. There were electrodes attached to her brain and chest. It was a sight not everyone could see._

 _"…_ _You dated Usui Takumi for a short while but it wasn't that serious. You broke up with him, realizing that you both were too immature right now. You broke up because you felt like you needed to concentrate on your career at the moment. After that, Usui Takumi had gone away from your life. You moved to Tokyo and joined the bachelor's program at Tokyo University that would help you achieve your dreams of becoming a lawyer. You also met another friend—Tora Igarashi, again in Tokyo... It turned out that he was also enrolled in the bachelor's program for business administration… He goes to the same college as you do and you both meet up on a regular basis… If you feel tired, please move your hand to signal me to stop. I'll come back tomorrow…okay, that's it for today then. Rest up, Misaki, and recover soon. You have so much to accomplish, become a lawyer and achieve great heights…but for now, you need to sleep."_

* * *

 ** _Two days later_**

Kanou stared at Misaki's figure resting peacefully. She was about to wake up soon, since the effects of all medicine were worn off by now. It had been three days. Three days since that fateful night that changed everything. Misaki's family had arrived. They've been informed that Misaki had been in a car accident—a typical hit and run. She received some minor injuries and a bump on her head that resulted in concussion and memory loss that would soon go away… As far as Misaki's family was concerned, the matters were taken care of. They didn't know anything much about Takumi and the fact that he'd left for England. All that they knew was that Takumi and Misaki hadn't kept in touch after high school…

In short, they knew nothing.

Kanou sighed, he couldn't understand how everything was taken care of so smoothly. Well, this was Takumi's doing. Of course, everything went by smoothly. Only one thing remained—Misaki.

He wouldn't know whether the treatment had worked or not until Misaki woke up. He had tried to alter the least of her memories. He felt so guilty when he came to know about it all through Takumi, but this was something serious—something he could not talk Takumi out of. Even though all this seemed to be unnecessary, Kanou saw logic behind Takumi's words. This was the only way to ensure Misaki's safety. Something that would result in the least heartbreak and pain for Misaki.

Of course, it wouldn't hurt much.

If they made her believe no reason for being hurt existed.

He remembered how back in high school, his hypnosis hadn't worked. Misaki did not come to hate Takumi, because she didn't believe it on the inside. This was exactly why Kanou could not delete her memories or alter them entirely—she would never buy it.

So he had to be smart and subtle.

"Where am I?" he heard her voice come out coarse.

"You shouldn't exert your voice, Misaki-san." Kanou said.

"Kanou? What are you doing here?" Misaki said as she rubbed her head, "Why does my entire body hurt so badly? Oh god! What time is it? I have classes!"

So she did remember him…which meant that her primary memories remained.

"Please lie down." Kanou instructed as the nurses helped her sit up, "You were in an accident."

"An accident? I don't remember being in an accident." Misaki said as she tried to think back, her head hurt when she tried.

"Don't stress it. I'll tell you everything once you're okay." Kanou assured her as he held her wrist and the nurse plunged an injection in her vein.

"I don't understand." Misaki said.

"Which is why I'm here." Tora Igarashi said as he stood by the doorframe of Misaki's room.

"Tora?" Misaki said, she looked shocked to see him here.

"You were in a car accident, we were going to meet for dinner last night after your classes got over." He said coolly as he put his hands in the pocket of his pants. "You drive too rash."

Misaki looked at the cuts and bruises on her hands, "I can't remember anything about it...All I can remember…is pain, and a voice."

"It'll come back to you."

"I hope so too."

* * *

 ** _Presently_**

Mia Kirei walked inside the CEO's office with an envelope in her hand. It was an application that explained her absence for the last six days. She had faked up an illness—just the usual, viral fever. She walked in the hallways, unsure of her own steps. As she neared the CEO's office, her heart began to beat faster. She just had to put the application on his PA's desk and be on her merry way.

Easier said than done.

She couldn't help but want to be near him, but she couldn't be near him. This was messed up. She hoped to see his face from the side-lines though, that would be enough.

She opened the wooden door that lead her to the PA's office, she placed the white envelope on the table and saw Takumi standing at the doorstep to his office, "Mia." He said, acknowledging her. She forced a smile, "Takumi."

"How are you?" He asked, his hand came out of his pants' pocket and went straight to caress her cheek. She could not understand this foreign exchange, so she just stood there dumbfounded.

"I'm okay." She said, "I better go down or Aaron will kill me." She said, excusing herself, before Takumi could say something, the door opened and revealed Gerard Walker with his signature smile on his face, "Is this a bad time?"

"Yes," Takumi said irritably, he hadn't seen Gerard since a long time, but he couldn't help but feel annoyed by his mere presence.

"I-I'm sure its not." Mia said, attracting two pairs of eyes on her. She noticed how Gerard was a splitting image of Takumi, except for the color of his hair and eyes. He seemed to be just as shocked to see her face as she did.

"Ah, forgive me. Where are my manners?" Gerard chuckled,

"In the trash can." Takumi replied with a satisfied smirk on his face.

"Ah, ignore my little brother. I must introduce myself—I am Gerard Walker, Takumi's elder brother." Gerard said with a smirk, "And you might be?" He said as he took her hand and kissed it—causing Mia to turn red instantly. She was not used to such greetings, even though she was raised in England herself.

"I'm Mia Kirei." Mia said. Takumi stood next to her with his arms crossed nonchalantly.

"How fascinating, I almost took you for someone else. My bad." Gerard laughed and Mia's eyes widened. She saw how Takumi clenched his jaw and looked away, she chose not to say anything. This was her cue to leave before things got weird.

"I must excuse myself." Mia said as she turned around to leave. "It was nice to meet you, Mr Walker."

"Ah, call me Gerard." Gerard spoke as he waved. Mia waved back hesitantly as she saw Takumi walk inside his office, ignoring everyone.

Mia exhaled a deep breath as soon as she got out of the office. The closer she seemed to get to Takumi's real acquaintances, the more she realized that they all had seen 'Misa'—considering their reactions upon meeting her.

Which meant that the separation didn't happen long ago.

Or these people were really close to Takumi and knew answers to her questions.

Mia walked to her cabin and sat down with her head in her hands—time was running out and she had to make use of the length of her stay in Japan if she wanted these answers.

Yep,

She was going to do something about it.

* * *

"Found yourself a photocopy, have you?" Gerard smirked as he poured wine in two glasses. Takumi stood by the glass window, "Its time you finally stopped putting your nose in my business, Gerard."

"I'm just curious—where did you find her?"

"You talk like she's some sort of toy I found at the mall" Takumi looked at Gerard, who sipped his wine with a smile.

"Isn't she? Tell me Takumi, isn't she a toy? A distraction for you to get by?" Gerard asked.

"Shouldn't you be more worried about this branch? Its practically falling apart as we speak." Takumi retorted as he took the wine.

"I trust you." Gerard said, with a small smile that went unnoticed by Takumi. "Why are you here, Gerard?"

"I don't know, let's suppose I have nothing better to do. My marriage got fucked, this branch is in shambles, and lets just say I'm having a blast— quite literally." Gerard said, truthfully, he wanted to add more things to his statement, but he couldn't.

"Tough times, huh…" Takumi said absentmindedly as he looked out of the window.

"What is your relationship with Mia Kirei?" Gerard asked as he swirled the wine in his glass.

"She's not my toy. That's all you need to know." Takumi said.

"Is she a replacement for Misaki Ayuzawa?" Gerard dared, as he looked at Takumi.

"Don't take that name from your filthy mouth" Takumi said, as he looked at Gerard.

"You didn't answer my question. Can Mia replace Misaki?"

"Never" Takumi said quickly.

But then he added more, after he saw Gerard smiling, "Why do you care? Haven't you had enough fun tearing my life apart? Do you want to threaten me with Mia's life as well? Have a knife plunged in her neck too, do you?" Takumi said with a sadistic smirk on his face. He had gotten to a point in his life where he was talking to the person who had been responsible for the most fucked up situations that he ever encountered. It was strange how life worked.

"I wonder what Misaki must be doing right now." Gerard said with a wicked smirk. He wanted to test the waters.

Takumi said nothing.

"Must she be going around fucking every other man who had blonde hair and emerald irises as we speak?" Gerard dared to go further, but that was it for Takumi.

He found himself pinned to the ground moments later, the shards of the bottle of wine he had been sipping so peacefully were plunged into his forehead and there was blood coming out of his jaw. Cedric held Takumi down, away from him. Gerard wanted to laugh—amidst all this fun, he was now assured of one thing.

Takumi still loved her…hell, he loved her more than he had ever loved her before. The red blood all over his clothes was the green signal he had been waiting for.

Gerard laughed.

He felt another object hit him from far away.

* * *

 **READ REVIEW FAVORITE FOLLOW**

 **Author's Note:**

Hey guys, Its me, MissKirei coming back to this story. I've been so busy the past two months—there was no time to update. I haven't even worked on my book in this time duration and I think I'm going to postpone it till after February. I have this big exam coming in February which is basically an entrance exam for my post grad.

Anyway, thank you for bearing with me. I'm trying so hard to finish MFUH first and then touch Ups and Downs, and APOF because I know that I wouldn't be able to run all three in parallel. I also figured that It would be better to be in touch with one story line rather than getting two three months late updates. There is literally so much on my plate academically.

I did research work, and am currently guiding a few people and co-authoring their research papers. I don't even want to think about the stuff I have to do.

I have literally gotten a five day break since the beginning of this year.

But, I want to update so bad! I wrote two chapters of MFUH today, and I hope I can find the time to update more. Why don't we talk about the story instead!?

 **Misaki's memories were altered.**

Okay, wow, I hadn't given this much thought when I began writing the story. This is such an important factor in this story. Misaki not remembering her relationship with Takumi is going to impact the characters so much! I want to unravel what happens next as soon as possible.

I also want to say, writing this part where Kanou talks to Misaki during her REM cycle as he messes with her memories was so hard to write. I didn't know much about the technicalities and stuff, but I tried my best. I also think that this scene was a very important part of this story. Misaki does not forget everything entirely, instead Kanou chose to alter her memories in some parts. For example, he didn't make her forget that Takumi ever existed, but he just made her forget that they had something serious in their relationship. He probably did this to make her feel natural. He knew he could not delete the entire memories she had because that would leave so many holes in her memories, so he probably decided to alter the ones that directly impacted her.

 **Tora Igarashi**

I think its important to realize why Takumi actually went to Tora Igarashi when he had already gotten rid of everything with Kanou's help. Takumi knew that even though Kanou would take care of Misaki's memories, there was still a risk of her discovering things and she would try to search for Takumi.

Tora Igarashi had connections in the business world and he was the only one who could keep Misaki away from Takumi and his world. He also knew that Tora's feelings ran deep and he would do anything for her—if he were given a chance. This is proved in the manga when Tora goes out of his way to make Takumi and Misaki meet in the Raven Castle. Him kissing Misaki in front of Takumi also justifies the depth of his feelings.

 **What will Mia do?**

It is clear that Mia is depressed, and has started to feel worthless. She would go to any depths to find out about Misaki, if Takumi does not open his mouth. She has two sources that can answer her questions—Kanou Soutaro and Gerard Walker. When she gets her answers, it will be up to her to decide what to do.

Her inability to talk to Takumi about the status of their relationship also shows how she is unwilling to let him go just yet. It is probably because she wants to go to the depth of the information she has received and she for herself who 'Misa' is and what she means to Takumi.

Takumi does not show himself to be eager to break things off with Mia as well. Normally, he would leave without even a second thought but with the realization that he has somehow become the worst version of himself, he feels guilt in his heart although it contradicts his love for Misaki. It seems like Takumi is torn between the past and the present and cannot decide what he wants. Does he want to live in Misaki's memories forever or does he want to forget her and move on with Mia.

Okay, so that's all I have for you guys today. I'll be replying to all the reviews collectively in the next update probably. And until then I hope you guys will wait for me.

I know that you guys are so patient with me and I'm so thankful for that. Let's just say that I'm the type of author who likes to leave subtle hints behind. They will serve as bread crumbs that will lead to the bigger picture. So what do you think will happen next? Let me know in the reviews below.

Also wanna thank all the reviews who enjoyed reading "Wildest Dreams" which was just a spin off kind of one shot. I'm sorry I won't be making it a multi-chap series even though you guys wanted me to…maybe someday in the future but I don't have the time right now. I hope you all understand and wait for me!

So much Love!

 **-MissKirei**

 **||~MISS~KIREI~||**


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17: Those fading green eyes**

" _I dream of green eyes._

 _Like some cut out scenes from a movie, I see green eyes repeatedly. Like a tape that had been put on infinite looping, replaying again and again in my head. I see flashes, of things that could have been. Although I cannot remember the face of the one who has these eyes, I can recognize that these flashes have a comfortable, homey feel associated with them. How can something so frightening be so…so soothing at the same time?_

 _I have always tried to get my mind off these thoughts and flashes. As far as my limited knowledge of the human psychology tells me, it just might be a recurring dream or probably a figment of my crazy imagination. Perhaps I just really like green eyes? This sounds so bizarre to me now that I put it in a different perspective._

 _My thoughts have been all over the place, if put together, they could probably form an excerpt of unrelated things just put together in a messy, jumbled combination that would make no sense._

 _Maybe I've just been thinking too much these days…"_

* * *

She didn't remember how or when her hair got cut off, the waist length tresses were at most touching her shoulders now. Maybe they had to cut all length of her hair because of the 'car accident' she couldn't remember being in. She rubbed her neck, subconsciously remembering the wound she had gotten there. The doctor had told her she got a piece of glass embedded in her neck during the accident. She couldn't even begin to picture herself being in such a horrific accident, and it didn't even make that much sense to her now, but she decided to think past that, she was alive and more than happy to thank whatever Gods that had saved her from death.

Misaki walked towards the lecture hall where her current lecture was supposed to be conducted. She carried two books in her arms and a side bag which contained the bare minimum of her essentials. It was hot and she felt a bead of sweat roll down her back. Ugh. She hated that.

Her annoyance skyrocketed up as she felt another annoying presence walking next to her with a smile on his face. His toothy grin may have taken hearts of many but it was nothing but annoying to her! He extended a hand for a girl who almost tripped, and smiled chivalrously towards her, flashing a megawatt smile.

The girl was done for.

Misaki ignored all these events and walked faster, in attempts of trying to reach her class at time. She didn't want to be kicked out of the class or have a bad impression of herself on the professor.

"Its amazing how you try to dodge my presence off, Misaki." Tora Igarashi remarked as he walked besides her, Misaki let out an annoyed grunt, "I must admit, your huge ego makes it too hard for me to ignore your presence, but I try." She said with a sarcastic smile as she turned in the hallway. Tora laughed, "Someone's getting better at taunting."

"Let's just say, you bring out the worst in me, Igarashi-san." Misaki said as she wiped off her sweat irritably.

Tora couldn't help but grin, "I also would like to bring out the best in you, but you're always busy attending classes."

"Well, unlike you, I don't have a ready-made empire waiting for me to take over." She said.

"Ouch, you make me sound like a freeloader."

"I only say what I see." Misaki laughed smugly. Tora's eyes widened.

"For your information, I have been working my ass off since I was sixteen." He said in his defence.

"Oh my, does ordering a bunch of people around called working?! I must be living on another planet then!" Misaki said, getting annoyed by these pointless talks.

"It takes a leader to sit on a throne and maintain his power." Tora said as he looked up at the large dome like ceiling of the hallway as they walked.

"Then why are you here, Tora? I know my reasons— I want to become a lawyer. If you know what's already set out for you, why are you wasting your time trying to get a degree that would be as good as a piece of paper to you?"

Tora looked at her with a smile, "Let's just say I needed a break from the monotony I call my life."

"Sounds more like an excuse to me." Misaki said as she entered the large lecture hall, the professor hadn't arrived yet and she had found herself a seat too.

Tora looked at her as he sat down next to her, he wish he could just say what actually he was doing here, but he decided not to.

"You're not even in this class!" Misaki said as she looked around, hoping no one threw him out.

"From now onwards, I am." Tora said as he took out a notebook and a pen from nowhere.

Misaki sighed as she dropped down in her seat, there was no use arguing about it. She had tried it many times in the one year she had spent with him in college, by now, she had understood that there was no use trying. It was like arguing with a stupid crabby child.

* * *

 **Presently,**

Mia sat uncomfortably out in the waiting room, tapping her foot against the floor carpet unconsciously, her fingers intertwined. The decision of visiting the doctor had been pretty well thought on her part, but with every passing moment that she spent in agony, she regretted it.

Doctor Kanou Soutaro was a widely known psychologist and researcher, apparently he held many awards and accomplishments in the field. He was more than familiar with the intricate workings of the human mind. From the last time Mia had met him, she had already ruled out the fact that this person was someone who could easily mind-fuck anyone, and her inference turned out to be true when she visited his clinic and saw the glorious display of his accomplishments just sitting on the wall.

Regardless, she wasn't here to commend him on his nationwide success, she was here because she wanted answers. She wanted to know who Misa was and what role she played in Takumi's life. She wasn't positive that she was going to get a lot of information, but she had decided to show up on his door because Dr Kanou had himself said that she could contact him if she had any questions, so here she was.

All these calculations in her mind kept her mind off her nervousness. What if Kanou refused to answer her questions? What if he told Takumi? What if he—

She needed to have a positive outlook about this.

Mia sighed.

"The doctor is done for the day, he has requested for your presence." A timid, male secretary came out and said in a warm voice. Mia merely smiled and walked inside the door, trying to hide the fact that she had no tactic planned out and she was not even sure what she was doing here.

"Kirei-san" Kanou took off his white jacket as he smiled and motioned for her to sit down. Mia nodded as she placed her jacket on another chair.

"How can I help you?" He said, as if testing the waters. Mia sighed as she looked at him, with a resolve of steel she started to speak.

She was not leaving without answers.

"I want to know about Misa."

"Misa?" Kanou looked at her, it took him a while to realise that she meant Misaki. His face turned glum.

"Oh, Misa." Kanou forced a smile, "She was my patient once, yes. What do you want to know about her?"

Patient? Why had Misa been his patient? Mia kept the question to herself. "I want to know about her."

"Don't you think that I, perhaps, am not the right person to answer this question?" Kanou said, with a small sympathetic smile. He knew how Takumi could evade such questions.

"If you know Takumi, you must have ruled out why I'm here." Mia said, "Look, I want to be honest." She bit her lip, "I just want him to be happy, Kanou-san, and if that requires me asking you this question, then yes, I think that you're just the person who could answer my question."

"Does Takumi know that you're here?" Kanou asked with a surprised expression on his face and leaned forward.

"I'm afraid Mr Walker doesn't get updated with everything that I do." Mia smiled as she held the hem of her dress.

"There isn't much to tell." Kanou said as he stood up and faced the window. "They had been in a relationship a long time ago…that's about it."

"A long time ago?" Mia asked as her interest spiked up, even though it hurt to listen, she was still willing to.

"Yeah, a very long time ago."

"Then what happened?" Mia said hurriedly.

"The inevitable." Kanou said remorsefully as he stared out of the window, he adjusted his specs and turned towards her with a smile, "I mean, they both moved forward in their separate directions."

"Who broke up?" Mia's heart raced for no reason as she leaned forward, eagerly waiting for an answer.

"Nobody," Kanou chuckled a bit, then got silent, "I mean, it was probably a mutual decision."

"Okay." Mia said, this information gave nothing away. She looked at Kanou, suspecting him of very cleverly dodging the bullet.

He was hiding something.

Kanou analysed Kirei from afar as he leaned on his chair, "Look, Kirei-san, I don't want to make you feel dejected, but the direction you're thinking in is a dead end. The path that you want to walk upon is only filled with nothingness and agony, especially on your part. Its useless trying to revive an old flame, especially one which has turned to ashes."

"Can you at least tell me her full name? I don't think it must be just "Misa"" Mia chuckled as she ignored whatever Kanou had said. Kanou shockingly looked at her, "Ah, My apologies, it has been years since Misa had been my patient, I'm afraid I do not remember her full name." he said.

Mia laughed as she stood up and leaned towards him, "My apologies, Doctor-sama, but your lie is not very convincing. Perhaps I shall stop by tomorrow and wait for you to remember?" she challenged him, leaving Kanou's mouth agape as she stood up and took her jacket. Kanou looked at her speechlessly,

Mia and Misa had something in common.

They both were stubborn and refused to give up.

Kanou pushed his hair back with his hand and laughed, he would wait for her to visit tomorrow for sure. If she would earn it, he would tell her eventually.

* * *

Mia sighed as she placed her cheek on her desk dejectedly as she stared at the blurry computer screen. Even though she had walked off coolly, she was back to square one. Even if Kanou wouldn't tell her something substantial, she would still need her name to say the least. She decided to try and find someone with the name of Misa on the internet. Perhaps she could find someone who lived nearby, someone near Takumi's age?

She typed in the name "Misa" but the results were not uplifting at all. The matching profiles belonged to teenage high school girls. Mia sighed, Misa could not be a high schooler for sure. Sadly, the name Misa did not give anything away and was a mystery in itself. She wished she could have gotten the name from Kanou Soutaro directly.

Pondering was fruitless, Mia thought as she flipped the pages of a lawsuit that was filed against their CEO. The lawyer was M. Ayuzawa. The lawyer's profile spoke volumes about his or her behaviour. Mia imagined M. Ayuzawa to be a crude old man in his fifties. She could only hope that Takumi's lawyer would win the case.

She saw Gerard Walker walk by her cabin from the floor to ceiling glass. She had thought that he had gone back to England, but perhaps the situation was so bad that he had to stay.

She thought back to their first meeting. Gerard had been surprised to see her. Her intuition had told her that perhaps she looks too much like Misa and he had mistaken her for Misa that evening. The smile on his face had vanished as soon as Mia had looked his way.

Wait…

Mia played with the click button on her pen as an idea came to her mind.

Kanou was not the only one who could tell her about Misa.

But she would have to be careful, very careful indeed. She was going to play a dangerous game, one wrong move and she'd be done for.

But

This was the only thing to do.

* * *

Things started to get better with the third glass.

Takumi sighed as he felt the burn in his throat. It was so bittersweet, both literally and metaphorically that he had grown to like alcohol. He still remembered the night, at three forty am when he had taken the first sip. Back at Tora's mansion, when he accepted swapping roles with Tora. He was getting the woman he liked and Takumi got a loyal companion, a glass of liquid that could put him off whenever he wanted to.

His vision was already fucked up from the start from all the reading. The words swam in front of his eyes as he tried to make sense of whatever the fuck the bottle read. He set the bottle down as his heart raced because of all the heat the liquid provided. He closed his eyes with a hand to cover his hand from the bright lights. He was so sick of himself—why was he doing this to himself.

He felt another fit of cough come up as he started to cough violently. It caused him to stand up from his comfortable sofa chair. His throat became dry even though he had been drinking—something, if not water. To him, they both had begun to taste the same with the course of time. The dryness of his mouth made coughing quite painful and he could feel his throat bleed as he drank straight from the glass—only to realize that it was whiskey. His throat burnt like hell, making him get down on his knees trying to soothe out the pain in any way. The empty walls of the room began to spin as he tried to gain his balance—something he failed miserably at.

Takumi found himself at the carpeted floor, panting, his heart beating, his throat burning as he tried to take deep breaths. He closed his eyes when the ceiling didn't stop spinning and just hoped to be cut out from all this pain in any way.

Gerard stood by the entry door of Takumi's room as he looked at the masterpiece he had created. He felt ashamed of himself as he took the remote to pull the draperies and asked Cedric to take care of Takumi. Gerard could not bear to look at the sight. The only thing he could do was take the glass away from his unconscious brother.

 **||~MISS~KIREI~||**

I know, this chapter doesn't add any substance to the story except for the plot building part but I'll try to move forward with this story as soon as I can. Again, as you guys can see I almost updated three months later, it is clear that I'm not getting the right amount of time required to update the chapters that are in my head. Anyways, enough about me. I read all the reviews and pms even though I could not address them, just letting you guys know how much feedback matters. If it weren't for those messages and reviews, I probably wouldn't have written this too. Anyways, stay tuned for what ruckus Mia plans to create.

Have a nice day, guys.

Much love.

 **By the way,**

 **Guys, I found a great way for you all to send me your personal feedbacks/ confessions/ thoughts/ whatever you think about myself. You can post as anonymous here: I am attaching the link of my Sarahah profile that I especially created for this purpose, I am also putting my real picture for some peek-a-boo and all the good stuff! Do visit the page and fill me in with all that you want to share with me. I will answer everything in the next update. Just type this in without the spaces.**

Miss Kirei. Sarahah. com


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18: Revelations**

Mia sat in front of Kanou Soutaro, again. He pinched the bridge of his nose as he looked at her; she had been paying him a visit every day since she first came asking about her all of a sudden. It seems to him that Mia is stubborn and persistent.

He half-smiled.

"Dr Soutaro" She addressed him with a smile.

"What brings you by, Mia-san?"

"I'm sure by now you must be aware of my reasons to visit."

"I'm not sure how I can help you with such reasons. I am merely a doctor, Mia-san."

"One who knows exactly what I want" She added with a smile. Kanou ran a hand through his hair. "Do you even understand the implications of what you're asking me? Mia-san, if you know Takumi any better, you must be aware of his temper. I can assure you that I do not want to get on his bad side."

"Huh, ever heard of playing it dangerous?"

"Not when you're dealing with Takumi Walker. You underestimate him, while he may bring no harm to you—he just might put my head on a silver platter for the same."

"What's the big deal, I just want to know about her."

Kanou sighed, if only she knew how big of a deal it truly was…

"Okay, I'll start with the basics, what's her name? Ne? Her full name?"

He chose silence over a reply as he opened another file of paperwork. Mia sighed as she clenched her jaw, "What harm could possibly a name bring? Do you not trust me, Dr Soutaro?"

"It's not about trust," Kanou said as he closed the file irritably and took off his specs. She was beginning to get on his nerves now.

"Then? What is it about?" Mia asked.

"You don't understand the wounds you are going to scratch if you bring her up. It's best to keep some things buried and not look at them."

Mia was silenced.

"Those wounds are still fresh to him, and by asking me about her, you're just going to pour salt over it."

"I…"

"Please, Mia-shi, don't force me. I don't think I can help you."

"Dr Soutaro-san!" Mia stood up, she felt helpless, even when she tried so many times, it seemed to be a dead end. She looked at Kanou, with the façade of confidence shattering away, she finally showed him how desperate she was.

"Kanou-san. You and I both know that I can't really do much even if I find out about Misa-san's full name. I promise to not bring the name in front of Takumi when I see him and to be honest, I don't think I'd be able to say anything to him now, let alone ask him about a previous relationship…"

"Misaki Ayuzawa."

"But anyway, I'm thankful to you. It's okay if you can't he— what?"

"Misaki Ayuzawa," Kanou coughed, "Is Misa's full name. Now don't ask me anything more, this is all that I can tell you."

"Misaki Ayuzawa?" Mia repeated,

"Hai," Kanou said as he loosened his tie. "Are you content now?"

"I'm very thankful to you." Mia smiled, "You were a great help, thank you." Mia said and bowed, "As I promised, I won't ask anymore and leave you to your work."

Kanou laid back in his chair when Mia left his office. There. He told her. Would it keep her satisfied? He smiled, its not like a name could bring much harm.

Mia walked on the sidewalk of the road as she exited the clinic. She felt content with the information she received, even if it wasn't much, it was at least something. She sighed, Kanou wasn't open to say anything more than this, so she would probably have to find a better source of information.

Mia sighed as she looked up, coincidence or not, the same moment the billboards flashed images of Gerard Walker, the heir to the Walker Foundation. She stared at the image of his impassive face. He stood straight, wearing a three-piece suit as always. He had become a big shot celebrity in Japan, ever since he had come here. Mia bit her lip, a person like that wouldn't be easy to talk to.

She hunched her shoulders, she was dealing with non-average people every single day these days. She couldn't even have imagined her life to be turning out like this. From what she had thought—she was bound to live a normal— _happy_ life, but things were quite the opposite these days.

She focussed on the road instead and starting walking in the direction of the company apartment where she now lived.

Takumi sighed as he looked over his watch. He didn't know what he was doing, or why he was here, he just acted on an impulse, and found himself standing underneath the lamplight of the street. His car was parked to the side and he kept looking in the direction from where he came.

He saw Mia walking down the street, humming a silent tone. She looked up and stopped dead in her tracks when she saw him. Takumi clenched his jaw as he tried to find a way to start the conversation.

Mia tried to keep a calm composure as she walked towards the entry gate of the apartment. She didn't know what to do except for ignoring him, but he called out her name the moment she turned—he wasn't in the mood of playing games, which also meant that he was here solely to visit her.

"T-Takumi."

"Mia." He said as he stopped leaning against his car. "Have you been well?"

"Mhm, and you?"

"The same." He was quick to reply. Mia looked down at her shoes and Takumi looked up at the sky; The both of them equally felt the awkwardness and didn't dare to start talking.

"Mia I—"

"Can we talk somewhere else?" She smiled, as she saw her co-workers talking.

"Sure" Takumi said as he unlocked his car.

"Let's just walk instead." Mia chimed in, as she started to walk into the silent alley. Takumi said nothing, and followed her.

"So what brings you by?" Mia spoke, after an eternity of silent walk. Takumi, who was looking over at the sky, looked down at her, noticing how short she was, compared to him.

"It just didn't feel right." He said as he looked at the stars again, "You deserve an explanation, and I also wanted to say that I wasn't seeing other women when I was seeing you—I…" he stopped talking, and Mia sighed, feeling strange after his admittance.

"I shouldn't have gotten you involved with myself—", Takumi continued as he stared at his hands, he was at a loss of words, but wanted to convey what he felt nonetheless.

"It's not like it was a crime, Takumi… People act on their feelings." Mia said, "Can I be honest?"

"Of course."

"I'm glad… but, can I just…" She stuttered, Takumi noticed the change in her voice.

"Can we be friends? For today? For a week? For at least a while?" She stopped walking altogether and looked at him. He saw tears in her eyes and a broken smile. He took out his hand from his pocket, to pat her head as a soothing gesture but it reminded him too much of Ayuzawa so he withdrew it, and gave her a formal hug instead.

Mia felt her defences break down in the blink of an eye, the Takumi who embraced her, felt different to her. She didn't think it was the Takumi she met, or the Takumi she saw that night. He said nothing but he placed the palm of his hand over her back to comfort her.

Not wanting to exchange any words anymore, she withdrew. "Good Night." She said softly, and left. Leaving Takumi behind, in the darkness. He merely watched her back as she retreated. His shadow fell on the dim lit street and he could barely recognise the person he had come to be.

Mia started to run as soon as she was out of his sight, and only stopped when it became too unbearable. She let out her tears openly into the night, and sobbed till her throat dried.

Gerard sighed as his violent cough ended, he stared blankly at the blood stains painted on his handkerchief as he looked at the glass of wine he had been drinking beforehand. Somehow, he was reminded of the sound of Misaki's shrieks from five years ago. He sat down, it seemed as if he was running out of time to make amends.

He dialled Charlotte's number when his breaths became even and tossed his phone away dejectedly when she didn't pick up the phone.

"Get this lawyer-san, the Walker Corporation can no longer hide from me. I have strong evidences and now I won't be stopping even if you beg me to. I hope you're ready." Said a female voice over the phone. The lawyer sighed as the phone call ended, "She's not listening anymore."

"Who?" Aaron asked.

"Ah, just a lawyer from the opposition. It's a human rights lawyer. Did you find any breaches in the employee records?"

"Not any yet, but I find it strange that a higher up assaulted employees. Wasn't he just looking for trouble by doing so?"

"Things were different when Gerard Walker ran the Walker Corporation, when Takumi Walker came in, he paid the least amount of attention to the headquarters in Tokyo, even though this was the centre that oversaw the entire trade from Asia." The lawyer added, "I'm assuming people took advantage of that, since the higher ups didn't have anyone to report to."

"Were things really that bad?"

"I'm afraid I can't say."

Satomi placed a file on the lawyer's table, "This is a list of all the managers and directors in the last two years."

"Thank you." Aaron said.

The landline ran and Satomi picked up the phone, everyone became silent as they waited to hear what happened.

"The CEO has called for me." She said.

"So, did the strategic planning team find any clues?" Takumi said as he signed a file and closed it.

"Not anything of interest has been found. There was a phone call from the lawyer of the opposition. She makes strong claims that the Walker Corporation was involved in human trafficking…"

Takumi sighed, as he pressed a bell. His secretary came in,

"Arrange for a meeting with the lawyers. Do it before lunch. Dismissed."

He continued typing as Satomi bowed and left. Was someone really so thick skulled that he would hire interns and then use them for human trafficking? He couldn't understand.

"Fetch me files of the campus leads that were involved in intern drives." He told his secretary.

Later that evening, Mia was called in the office of Gerard Walker.

"Did you call for me, sir?"

"Yes indeed," Gerard smiled as he gestured for her to come inside. "Please, do make yourself comfortable, Miss Kirei."

Mia smiled as she sat in front of him.

"You must be wondering why I called you in, Mia. Don't worry, this isn't work related at all." He said with another smile, "Wine?" He offered.

"N-no. I don't drink at work." Mia said, was this a test? She felt wary of the man sitting in front of her, realizing why everyone was so afraid of him.

"My, my. Didn't I say that this is not related to work? Perhaps you feel baffled because we are sitting in my office. Perhaps we should take our talks to a more…casual location?"

"N-No, this is fine!" Mia smiled as she tried to make him believe. Gerard smiled as he poured her a glass of wine, "Come one, try it. You'll like it."

"A-Ano…"

"Shouldn't defy your bosses now." He said as he placed a glass of wine in front of her.

"I just wanted to get to know you better, Mia-shi." Gerard said truthfully and Mia felt the hair on her hands stand up, "I just wanted to know who the girl that caught my brother's attention was, you see?" He smiled as he took a sip, "You must be an enigma."

"I'm sorry but you're mistaken." She smiled, "I am merely friends with Mr Walker."

"Ah, my friend, my brother doesn't make any friends. I've known him since the day he was born and he's never called anyone a 'friend' before."

Mia looked at Gerard strangely, how could someone never have a single friend?

"Except for that maid girl of course, but I wouldn't consider her to be a friend." Gerard said with a smirk as he remembered Misaki and how much Takumi loved her. He didn't seem to remember that Mia was present in the same room as him. "You remind me of her, that girl. But its history now."

"What do you mean?" Mia said all of a sudden. Gerard looked back strangely as if he was offended all of a sudden, "I-I mean… who was that girl?" She dared to test the waters.

"Oh it was a silly girl, I tell you. Headstrong and always looking for trouble…" Gerard said, he was half drunk, and half tired from last couple of sleepless nights. Mia looked at him eagerly, she wished she could drive out more information from him, but knew that it wouldn't be possible in office.

"Excuse me, I have to go right now." Mia said, apologetically, "But you can always call me for company, Mr Walker." She smiled as she wrote her number on a sticky note. "Thank you for the talk."

"Sure thing." Gerard said with a smile as she left. He ignited a cigarette the moment she stepped out of his office.

Mia smiled as a small hope flickered inside her chest. Maybe, just maybe, Gerard Walker wouldn't turn out to be a bad guy…

A few days later, on a Sunday, Gerard Walker called Mia asking her if she would like to drink wine outside of the office. She agreed to come, seeing it as a chance of finding something.

"It's nice to have a different company." Gerard said, as he sat in his lawn, drinking wine. Mia smiled as she took a sip. The scenery was picture perfect and the wind was soft. It was a great day.

"Can I ask you something?" She said,

"Sure, if I can answer your question, I will."

"You talked about a maid girl the last time you saw me." She continued, "Forgive me, but can you tell me about her?"

"There's not much to tell, she was just a maid." Gerard said with a stoic face.

"Was her name Misaki Ayuzawa?" Mia said and Gerard almost dropped the glass of wine in his hand.

"What did you say?"

"Misaki Ayuzawa."

 **~!~MISS~KIREI~!~**

Hey guys! I'm back with an update for this story as well. What did you think? The next time, many things are going to be revealed soon. Will Gerard spill the beans about Misaki? Will Takumi realise that he is losing himself? Will Mia uncover the truth?

This was in line for my update spree list, what do you think? Which story will I update next? Let me know. (:

Not replying to the previous reviews but I will respond to everything from now on.

Much Love

See you next time!

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	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter 19: No More Hiding Now**

Gerard Walker lived with smoke and mirrors. He stunk of brands and brandies, smothered in glamour and glory. Mia almost choked when she walked inside his office. It looked more or less like he had brought the whole England along when he came to Japan. She also noted a picture frame; in it was a beautiful woman, looking in another direction and smiling.

"Don't stare at Charlotte." Gerard said with a grin and a smile as he gestured her to sit down.

"Is that your g—"

"Wife, yes." He smiled as he looked at Mia, "I don't strike you as a player, do I?" He asked as he raised an eyebrow.

"Not quite." Mia said, looking away. Of course she thought that he was the player type.

"I am a faithful man." Gerard smiled as he poured wine for her. "Good for you" Mia replied.

"Ah, unfaithfulness runs in the family, but only in Takumi's veins. Not his fault that he inherited this side of our family, from mother." He said as he swirled the wine in his glass. Mia felt uneasy all of a sudden, why was he talked about such private things in front of a stranger like her no less?

"You shouldn't say such things about your family, Mr Walker" Mia replied firmly, in response to which Gerard couldn't help but let out a hearty chuckle. He was a bitter man.

"Well it's only the truth. It's a stain on our family name for sure. My mother was stupid, but it doesn't mean Takumi had to be too."

"I don't know what you're talking about, Mr Walker." Mia sighed, wondering why she was being dragged into such matters, "Aren't you too hard on your brother?"

"Well do you want to know what I'm talking about?" He tilted his head and looked at her seriously. Mia felt cornered, she didn't know how to react.

"Depends on how much you bend the truth." Mia said as she took a sip of her wine, two could play at this game.

"My brother has been a pain in the ass." Gerard said with a mean smile as he drank his wine. "And I've been left to clean up his mess, all the time."

"Maybe you just like sticking your nose where it doesn't belong." Mia shot back, she didn't know why she felt so angry all of a sudden. She just didn't like his tone.

Gerard stood up all of a sudden, he was too close to her face and she felt scared for a moment there. He traced his fingers along her cheek, "Aren't you cute now, Mia." He retreated when he was satisfied with the scared look on her face, and began to pour more wine in her glass.

"Well the story goes like this…" he sat back down as he moved his hands, explaining, "Like I said, my brother, Takumi, was a pain in the ass. He just couldn't be happy even after we did everything for him. Always complaining like a bitch. He had all the freedom to do anything, but he just had to defy our family."

Gerard smirked to himself when he remembered the soft look on a teenager version of Takumi.

"Tch, little shit. Anyway," he continued, "What happened wasn't something new, he just had to fall in love with the girl who was off limits. Then I decided to teach him a lesson." Gerard scoffed, "He's been an asshole ever since."

Mia's jaw dropped after Gerard finished his little speech, she felt offended and annoyed by what he had said, "Sounds to me like you're too full of yourself." She stood up, and grabbed her bag.

"Well that's what happened, you're free to make biased opinions…" Gerard said as he moved his arm casually as he lit a cigarette.

"Love doesn't really work with logic and reason, you know? How can you expect your brother to follow a set out path? I can't stand to be around you." Mia said as she walked towards the exit door, and didn't look back when she left.

"Tch, soft-hearted girl." Gerard sighed as he looked at the now shut door. "You're too easy on him…"

* * *

"Sir, we can't hold this matter out any longer." A man, dressed in a formal suit, said to Takumi as he waited for his response. Takumi looked up, away from his laptop. "Well then let it begin. I can handle it."

"The lawyers are waiting for you in the conference hall." He informed and left. Takumi merely stood up and buttoned his blazer as he walked out of his office with his hand in his pant pocket. People wished him the time of the day but he couldn't focus so he merely ignored them on his way towards the conference hall.

His secretary walked along with him, reading out his schedule, telling him what all things he had lined up for the day. As for Takumi, who didn't really respond to anything, things were getting too boring.

He just wished to get on a plane and go somewhere.

And never come back.

"That's all for today, Sir."

"Great." Takumi replied. There was nothing great about anything that the secretary spoke. He stopped for a moment and wondered if he had any interest for anything anymore.

He walked inside the conference hall filled with lawyers from his company as well as the opposition. When he sat down, he was given a lot of paperwork to look at. He did not notice the people from the opposition as he got busy with the papers he had to sign.

"Mr Walker. Thank you for your precious time." Came a sarcastic toned voice—a voice he could recognize anywhere in the world, even when he was asleep.

It couldn't be…

It had been a while since he had felt tempted to look in the direction of the voice. He was stunned beyond words. He never thought he would see this face ever again. Was God playing a mean prank on him again?

He was lost—without any words, his mouth fell open as he felt the urge to stand up and question everything that was happening. The woman in front of him—

She had grown so much!

His heart skipped a beat for a moment, in a bad way. How could it be!?

"Mi—"

"Miss Ayuzawa, please do not address my client with such a tone." His lawyer spoke before he could get the chance. Takumi snapped as he looked at his lawyer, who almost got scared. He ran a hand through his hair all of a sudden, messing them up.

"Wait a minute." Misaki Ayuzawa spoke as she pointed her pen accusingly towards Takumi's face. "I know you from somewhere, Mr Walker."

The words felt like swords slicing his heart, she knew him from somewhere?! He was at a loss of words—stunned, and shocked.

"I believe we went to the same high school together." She said as she stood up, she made a face, remembering his name all of a sudden. "Usui—was it?"

Takumi felt the same hurt he always did when it came to her, he felt the urge to laugh. He stood up, "I'm a Walker, Miss…" He pretended to read her name tag, "Ayuzawa." and spoke in a foreigner's way, as if he didn't know Japanese.

She felt offended all of a sudden, when he acknowledged her in such a distasteful manner, but before she could say anything, Takumi's lawyer butted in. "I'm sorry, Miss Ayuzawa, but you wanted to schedule this meeting for meet and greet, did you? I can assure you that Mr Walker has more important things to do than just chit chat."

Takumi's mind raced with so many thoughts, he felt numb. Why was she sitting in his office? She had become a fine lawyer alright, he felt happy about that, but at the same time he felt the need to get away from her.

He couldn't risk her remembering everything.

So he acted aloof throughout the meeting, and lazily refused to acknowledge all of the accusations she sent his way. He was happy that she had become a formidable woman (—by the looks of it), but he didn't show it.

He stood up to leave, as soon as the meeting started to feel useless to him. He didn't look back when she tried to stop him, and got the hell out of the office. He ignored Cedric, and just took the car.

What was Misaki doing here, in his office?

Kanou Soutaro was having a good day, until he saw Takumi Walker sitting in the reception lobby of his clinic.

He cancelled all of his appointments right away, because he knew that something was wrong. Takumi looked lifeless when he called him inside. Kanou couldn't gather the courage to ask him what happened. There was a couch in his office on which he made himself comfortable. Kanou stood up from his chair,

"Hello to you too." He tried to lighten up the atmosphere, but Takumi didn't respond.

"Misaki." Takumi spoke as he put his arm over his eyes and looked at the ceiling. Kanou got alerted upon hearing her name.

"W-What about her? Do you miss her?"

"I saw her."

"What do you mean?"

"She was in my office. In front of me. She didn't recognize me." he spoke softly.

"How come?" Kanou felt shocked. Hadn't she gone overseas and began her career there? He thought he had kept tabs on her.

"I don't know." Takumi said irritably, "She thought I was someone from her high school." He smirked.

"No kidding. I guess she doesn't remember anything…"

"All these years I felt like there was a hole in my heart. It didn't race, I didn't remember my own heartbeat, until I saw her today. Its been a while since I've felt such pain… Always so sly, Ayuzawa…" he smiled looking at the ceiling. She had grown up to become so much beautiful than she already was. Was it even humanly possible to grow up to become so pretty? Her face was imprinted on his soul. She looked so… He hated himself.

"Well she sure as hell wouldn't have recognised you, not with this beard and the impassive face. You look forty, man." Kanou joked.

"No kidding." Takumi said as he sat up and walked towards the door.

"What are you going to do about it?" Kanou asked. Takumi didn't look back as he got out of the clinic.

"Takumi?" Kanou panicked as he kept calling out his name and followed him. Takumi just got in his car and left. Kanou tried to catch him but he was faster and got into his car too fast for him to catch up. He looked at the black car speeding away…

"What are you going to do, Takumi?"

Mr Walker's face looked very familiar to her.

Of course, he was just another rich snobby businessman, but he reminded her of someone. She remembered her school mate, Usui-kun, who resembled Mr Walker. Mr Walker had a rugged look, with a beard and serious features, unlike Usui from Seika High who was more carefree and relaxed. Both had a similar body structure—lean, but Mr Walker looked a very to-the-point kind of person, whereas Usui had been a fun and games kind of boy.

Then why did her entire body repulsed when she tried to reason with herself?

For a moment, she felt as if Mr Walker aged ten years as soon as looking at her face—he was taken aback, but he was quick to resort to impassiveness. He barely even showed any signs of a raised temper when all the lawyers accused him of various things. He almost seemed disinterested, as if there was someplace else he rather be.

She felt angry.

Sure, the Usui from Seika high was just a name of an annoying friend to her, but she had felt so strange when Mr Walker looked at her. There was something very _wrong_ with Mr Walker and his dismissal of her presence. She just couldn't put a finger on it. Surely, Mr Walker could almost pass for a handsome man, but this wasn't why her heart had raced at the sight of him.

It was almost like her body was keeping secrets from her.

She turned in her bed. She had noted the sharpness of Mr Walker's mind during the meeting. She sure as hell felt like investigating him thoroughly even if she had no reasons to.

Misaki sighed, this man was getting on her nerves, and she didn't even know him. She had remembered the exact moment when her eyes had captured Mr Walker's, and she felt a certain kind of pain—one she hadn't felt in almost five years…

She sat up straight all of a sudden—no, she shouldn't allow herself to feel this way just because of someone she saw today.

She walked towards the door which led to a mini veranda and looked out, it sure was peaceful tonight…

 **||READ||REVIEW||FAVORITE||FOLLOW||**

 **Hey guys,**

I guess I need to explain my disappearance once again. Well, as I had said that I would be updating regularly and then ended up disappearing for an entire month, I really hadn't wished to do that, but the circumstances became such that I ended up losing a lot of time and…

The truth is, I've been feeling depressed for about two months now.

It's not like I don't know why it happened, (I'd been preparing for something for the last year and well, I screwed up that), following this, a lot of things happened which can be counted as everyday failures like screwing up job interviews, getting my phone broken, lot of travelling, losing friends, gaining weight, losing track of my life… Everything is a mess right now, and even when I know the reasons why everything happened, its just not in my control right now. So I've been trying to give myself time (a lot of it), but things just haven't started to work out the way I wish they would…

Honestly, I've lost the motivation to do almost everything… **Everything.** Nothing really interests me anymore, I don't share any of this so openly but today I am. I'm really thankful to whatever energy I got to update this story.

I know that I'm letting you guys down and everything (I read all the pms and the reviews so I know you guys are waiting), but I'm really trying to get back to a healthy and balanced schedule now, so let's see if that works out for me… I'll see you very soon, as I really want to get on with this story…

P.S: Sorry if this update was really bland. I'll just re-write it if anything..

 **||MISS~KIREI||**

 **On to the reviews from last time**

 **Minniemiss123 chapter 18 . Feb 18**

 **WHY IS GERARD BEING LIKE THAT?! WHY DID HE CALL MISAKI A MAID GIRL? WHY ISN'T HE BEHAVING RESPECTFULLY?! I mean sure he was drunk STILL IF HE WANTS EVERYTHING TO GET IN ITS PLACE AGAIN, THEN HE CAN'T JUST GO ON SWIMMING SUCH DISTASTEFUL THINGS! If he had said it in front of takumi then he would have been dead by now. Just why had he called her silly and just a girl? Does he still think of her as trash or something? That bastard! I CAN KILL HIM BEFORE TAKUMI CAN EVER LAY HIS PRETTY HANDS ON HIM! Seriously, till now I was supportive of gerard and I was happy that he have changed and that he wants to make everything better. But then, JUST WHAT WAS THAT? WHAT HAVE HE SAID THAT?! I m super angry and annoyed right now. Idiot. Atleast he realised that he is running out of time. That he needs to move soon or it will be too late.**

 **Why is takumi being like this? I can't see him being with someone else. And that too that might be her replacement. Why? He have been parties for this long. Just a lil more. The lawyer is here to point out his negligence and to mend is broken heart again too. Just a lil more. I really can't wait for the moment when they both will come face to face. I justhope that it's not far away because once that happens, everything else would be gud and great. Or atleast so I think.  
Bad on kanou's part that her revealed her name. Now will gerard really spill the beans? Don't know what happened next but one thing is so sure that please update this one next. It's the best! Really a rollercoster. Can't keep my eyes off it so please :D**

 _Hey, thanks for the constant love and support, such reviews make me feel like I really have a shot at this writing thing._

 _I guess the reaction of them meeting wasn't so much detailed but a lot of light will be shed on the subject in further chapters, they're just being mature about it._

**Padfoot Starfyre chapter 18 . Feb 18**

 **Okay, Those encounters got a tad awkward. Particularly with Mia's encounters with Gerard.  
Seems that she is beginning to piece together what happened between Misaki, Takumi and Gerard, five years prior  
I think that Takumi has never gotten over what had transpired back then. Thus, leading to his broken state, and downward spirals. Even if he had acknowledged to himself quite fully. Also, that his relationship with Mia has that Mia resembled Misaki, thus, something for him to cling onto, at least partially.  
I believe Mia has already acknowledged that for Takumi, she's more of a carbon copy, or substitute. Which leads back to that Mia seeking answers.  
I am skeptical on Gerard telling Mia anything else on Misaki, even if he is half-drunk, and tired.  
Without Misaki, Takumi is lost, without Takumi able to let go.**

 _Hey, thanks for the constant love and support, such reviews make me feel like I really have a shot at this writing thing._

 _I agree with you on the subject, Mia has truly began to see him for what really is, after what Gerard and Kanou tell her, she's changing.. Isn't this what true love is? Understanding each other?_

 **Unknown chapter 1 . Feb 17**

 **Hey! Nice to have u back... Update this one next plz...BTW I missed ur updates like an idiot misses a point ; ur stories r too gud...and BTW just wanted to confirm ur nationality is only if u would want to ... Plz a takumi misaki interaction next- I have already imagined that scene too many times in my head and knowing ur records u r going to surprise us...ur stories r too intense I luv every bit of them...**

 _Hey, thanks for the constant love and support, such reviews make me feel like I really have a shot at this writing thing._

 _You got it, I picked this story up for updating because I really want it to move forward now. As for my nationality, I'm Indian. Not that it interests anyone, heh!_

**ptraryx chapter 18 . Feb 17**

 **A promise of together pleaseeeee**

 _Hey, thanks for the constant love and support, such reviews make me feel like I really have a shot at this writing thing. Next Time!_

**Silverlily95429 chapter 18 . Feb 17**

 **UPDATE THIS ONE NEXT. Okay Now update in reverse order! Lol. I'm sorry I was so darn happy when you updated. It seems like Gerard is the weak link but for all we know he could be playing Mia. Takumi I just feel a bit bad for him. I can't wait for a TakuMisa interaction though. Plz keep updating!**

 _Hey, thanks for the constant love and support, such reviews make me feel like I really have a shot at this writing thing._

 _I updated this one as per the popular demand, Gerard just might be the weak link that strengthens everything at last!_

**Sumi634 chapter 18 . Feb 16**

 **Finally I can wish takumi will meet misaki after so many years in next chapter as per your latest chapter update. Your writing style is so good it really look like one behave or feel if they are in takumi or mia good professional but look lost in personal life .  
You have update 18 chapter though it is misaki and takumi story but till now both couple has not meet. Story go through mia point of view as look like she is main character. When will be misaki view .what really takumi feel for mia .**

 _Hey, thanks for the constant love and support, such reviews make me feel like I really have a shot at this writing thing._

 _They met here!_


	20. Chapter 20

**||~MY FUCKED UP HEART~||**

 **~Chapter 20~**

 _There were fireworks in the night sky. It was spring festival, and things seemed to have gotten hotter, just like the weather. He had told her to brace for a surprise, and she was more than excited to find out what it was._

 _Of course, when he slid his fingers along the length of her legs, under her yukata, when they kissed—she was taken aback. He was all in for all the fun and naughtiness, not to mention the_ ease of access _that came with wearing Japanese traditional clothing. She looked beautiful and breathless, surprised by his boldness. He smiled and smirked when her eyes widened all of a sudden, and turned red, just like always. She wanted to get back at him for sure, but she didn't have half the courage, or the confidence required to do what she wanted to._

 _"_ _Let's get out of here." He said in a soft and kind voice, laced with a hushed sound, thanks to him getting drunk with her in a game. He needed to win the drinking game, just so that she wouldn't get too drunk. He knew she couldn't handle alcohol, but now he was starting to think that he couldn't either._

 _"_ _Why? Is this place not too good for your liking?" She tilted her head, with a knowing smile. The weather was beautiful—cherry blossom trees and all, the wine had done him well, her too, but unlike him—she had no plans of going crazy._

 _"_ _Hm, the company's all that matters to me, and I must say," He said as he lifted her chin, "I am loving my company right now." He said as he held her hand, and traced circled in her palm._

 _"_ _What's gotten into you?" She wondered out loud, not able to play their little talking game any longer._

 _He ran a free hand through his hair as he gave her a look, which made her shake. "I'm just thinking about how I would like to lay your down on this soft grass and do what I really want to, but then there are people everywhere."_

 _Misaki blushed red, but she wanted to know more about what he really wanted to do, which is how she found herself inside Takumi's apartment, a few minutes later. There were glasses of wine and he was rolling up his sleeves looking at her, from the kitchen._

 _Her heart beat got faster as she watch him fix something to eat for the both of them, the tension between them seemed to have cooled down on the outside, but she was still thinking about the ways the night could end. She was in no hurries to go home, since she was already spending the night at his place._

 _There were no worries._

 _"_ _What are you making?" She cleared her throat, and asked as she turned towards him._

 _"_ _Love" he easily replied as he cut some vegetables; he smirked when he realised what he said out loud. "I mean, food. You love food, right?"_

 _"_ _Of course I don't." She was quick to reply, and turned away, looking out at the large windows. His apartment had a pretty decent view._

 _She heard him laugh, moments seemed to have passed between them but she realised that he was done with the cooking when she found him whispering in her ear, "I'm still waiting for the day when you become completely honest with me, Ayuzawa."_

 _"_ _Wh-What do you mean!?" She thought she embarrassed herself with such a stutter-y voice, but she couldn't help but lose her cool when it came to him. "I'm always honest with y-you."_

 _"_ _Are you?" He asked once more, when he pushed her shoulders and she found herself lying flat on her ass with him looming over her. He supported himself using his left hand on the couch's edge, his leg separating her legs— naughtily as he ran his fingers over her collarbone. Misaki's breath hitched as she looked at his face. He was too close, just where she had wanted him to be (—secretly)._

 _"_ _Sometimes I wonder how you're this smooth." She said to him, trying to act angry, "Makes me wonder how many women have you been with already, you jerk!"_

 _He raised an eyebrow, he wasn't expecting such a turn of events; she was accusing him, wasn't she?_

 _"_ _There has always been you," He told her as his fingers found themselves where they had been before, just touching the surface of her thighs—so softly, so delicately. He didn't miss how she almost sighed, but he didn't comment on that, "And there will always be you, Mi-sa-ki." He whispered her name in her ear, as he placed a kiss on her neck._

 _"_ _You're unfair." She told him breathlessly, with hazy eyes. He smiled, "Am I not fair to you, love?"_

 _"_ _What's with the cheesiness?" she said._

 _He laughed as he held her gently, and flipped their positions. She sat atop him, breathless, looking like a snack he'd have any time of the day. Her kimono was very misplaced, tumbling down from one shoulder. The skirt was hiked up, because of their position, and his hand was placed firmly on her waist._

 _She placed her hands on his chest as she looked down at him, and forgot about all the embarrassment, and the useless worries that always clouded her mind. She pulled the strings of her kimono belt, letting the soft fabric run down her body. She bit her lip as she touched his hair with her hands._

 _He was surprised, he couldn't imagine her letting go like this. He cupped her face and pulled her in for a sweet kiss._

 _"_ _You'll have to re-heat dinner later." Misaki told him in between kissed as she began to unbutton his shirt, the control she had on her urges seemed to have slipped away into nothingness when she touched the scar on his torso. The scar made her remember how he had jumped off the roof just to get a stupid picture for her._

 _"_ _Now you're just plainly turning me on." He said with a smirk, and Misaki couldn't help but lose it when he began kissing her, and put his hands on her..._

"It was just a dream!?" Misaki yelled as she sat up feeling distressed. Her legs were shaking and her body felt hot. She sure as hell did not have a fever. She sighed, feeling embarrassed about the dream she just had. Her body was on fire, she confirmed that when she put her hand in her pyjamas to confirm. And what's worse was that she didn't even remember who the person in her dream was.

Wasn't it shameful to have sex with some stranger in a dream and not even know his name?

She sighed as she stood up, heading towards the bathroom to take a shower. It was 3AM and she was positive that she wasn't going to get any sleep in such a _state._

The water ran down her body and she wasn't sure if it was helping her arousal or just making it worse. She could remember the exact places where he had touched her and how it had felt and thinking about it now just made everything worse.

It was almost as if she had lived that dream, because it had felt too real.

She leaned against the cold wall of the bathroom, and thought about that man. He had blonde hair, but she couldn't properly remember his face. She felt agitated, had she met him before her accident and forgot about him?

It had been five years and she was still wondering about what all had happened before her accident, even if Kanou had filled her in about her life after her memory loss, she still felt that the information he provided was incomplete. She just never felt satisfied about anything after that accident.

It was almost like she lost a piece of herself when she got into the accident.

"I shouldn't think about such things! What's happened cannot be undone. I can't bring back my past even if I try, so just please stop thinking about it!" She told herself in the mirror, frowned, and then stepped out.

As Misaki lay in her bed in hopes of sleeping a little more, she traced her neck at the very spot where it had been kissed by that blonde haired man in her dream. She remembered his words, again and again until she finally fell asleep.

* * *

" _It will always be you, Mi-sa-ki."_

He remembered the words all of a sudden, as he looked at the mirror. Agitated, he ran a hand through his hair. Why was the entire Universe always conspiring against him like this? Why did he have to see her again? Why did that trigger all of his memories?

He was considering getting his memories erased now.

Takumi laughed, even if he did that, his lovely brother was sure to bring it up, just to get back at him.

Fucking Gerard.

He threw his phone at the mirror when it rang.

Cedric watched from afar how Takumi tormented himself. The maids talked about how Takumi seemed to have started losing it. He was always in a fucked up state of mind, unpredictable and it was just sad to watch him now.

"He must have gotten his heart broken pretty badly." A maid said as she wiped a tear watching Takumi walk towards his study.

"He doesn't seem attached to all the women that come over, so I'm not sure about the heartbreak thing." Another maid remarked.

"A heartbreak doesn't always have to be fresh, or related to love. Takumi-Sama has had a tough life, being always away from family, always having lots of responsibilities on his young shoulders…"

"Everyone has their set of scars, their own heartbreaks. For some, it's not as bad, for some, it's too much." Cedric said, "Master is feeling a bit low. I'll see to it." He said with a smile, the maids bowed and got back to work.

"But I still think that your scars are too big a burden for your young heart, Master." Cedric said to himself, thinking about Takumi.

"Come to check on me, have you, Cedric? Did my brother order this too?" Takumi said as he spun on his chair and looked at the chandelier hanging down the ceiling.

"You seem to be in a bitter mood, Master. Might I suggest taking a stroll in the garden? Perhaps some tea to refresh your mind?" Cedric said with a smile.

"Cedric, I want to tell you that starting today, you're relieved of your duties." Takumi said as he stopped spinning and sat straight. "I'm very thankful for your services, but now it's time that you gave your attention to your family instead."

Cedric was taken aback, "But master, what about you? Surely, you need someone around."

"I'm fine, I've been fine, and I'll be fine." Takumi said with a smile, "I cannot keep you away from your family because of my selfish brother any longer…"

"It's not like that at all. You've done more than enough for my daughters, I am very thankful, but I would like to serve you until my body allows me to."

"I'm just an heir to a rich family business who has no control over his life or decisions, Cedric. I can assure you that there's nothing special going on here which I won't be able to handle."

"Which is exactly why you need me, Takumi-Sama." Cedric smiled as he finished making tea, "Consider me a well-wisher in your life. I will not be quitting any sooner."

"Ah, I guess I really don't have any control over anything in my life." Takumi smiled as he took the tea.

"Sometimes, it's better to not have any control and let things work out on their own." Cedric smiled.

* * *

Kanou knew something was wrong the moment he saw Mia Kirei walking out of Gerard's office angrily. He wasn't here to interfere and all, he had just come here to check on Takumi. But now he decided that he had to.

He walked towards Mia and tapped her shoulder gently. She stopped frowning for a second and smiled politely, "What brings you by, Dr Soutaro?"

"Care for coffee?" He asked with a polite smile.

Mia sipped for coffee as she looked at Kanou, they were making small talks here and there, and she had forgotten why she felt angry for a moment.

"So, you come here often?"

"Sometimes, only when Takumi is around." Kanou said, "I saw you coming out of Gerard Walker's office. Is he your boss or something?"

"Not really, he just considers me an acquaintance, and likes to make me listen to his rants when he's drunk enough." She sighed.

"Really now?" Kanou set his cup down, "Be careful of him though."

"Ah, I'm sure he means no harm even if he's such an asshole." Kanou raised an eyebrow, "I mean, you should see how much effort he puts in complaining about Takumi."

"What did he say?" Kanou knew that he was stepping over a line but he had to get it out of her, just to make sure that Gerard wasn't up to something.

"He knows about my friendship with Takumi." Mia said that with unease, "And therefore he invited me over to tell me about Misaki-san."

Kanou stopped sipping his coffee.

Mia looked strangely at him, what'd gotten into him now.

"What did he say?" Kanou asked more curiously this time, he felt angry all of a sudden.

Mia went on to tell him about everything that Gerard said, and sighed when she finished. Kanou was speechless for a while.

"That bastard," He said all of a sudden, standing up. Everyone started looking and Mia felt uneasy, "What's wrong?"

"I feel like teaching him a lesson, how dare he use such words for Misaki!" he said angrily as he clenched his fingers into a fist. Mia was surprised, what was so special about Misaki that riled everyone up in different ways?

"Calm down, please." She told him as she pulled his arm down to sit, Kanou sighed, "Gerard hasn't left his habit of twisting the truth as always. She wasn't some maid-girl." He dragged his palm down his face, "Misaki Ayuzawa is the most fierce woman I've seen in my entire life. She wasn't some ordinary maid-girl, she made me who I am, hell—she…" he stopped talking, realising how emotional he was getting in front of Mia, who shouldn't be knowing about Misaki at all.

"What's wrong? Why did you stop?" Mia asked, she wanted to know more.

"Look—" He said with a sigh, "Gerard has just distorted the truth, whatever he said, isn't true. He's just twisting things. I can bet he just went on about the flaws he saw in her and didn't once mention anything that he did, right?"

"He didn't mention anything in particular."

Kanou felt angry thinking about Gerard, he wanted to walk right into his office and punch the hell out of him, but he couldn't. "Gah, he makes me so angry!" He exclaimed, and everyone started to stare at him.

"Don't make a scene, doctor sama." Mia emphasised the doctor word to remind him just who he was.

"Want to know what happened?" Kanou said all of a sudden.

"I do…" Mia looked down, "It's the only way I can help Takumi."

Kanou laughed, "You think you can resolve everything Gerard caused? It's funny."

"Well, laugh all you want." Mia said, she just wanted to help him, what was the hard in that?

"What's funny is how much you underestimate Gerard and the damage that he can do." He said with a serious face, "Which is why you're so comfortable just walking into his office as if he's harmless. You don't know Gerard, Mia. Don't even think about getting close and walking out alive when it comes to him."

"Why are you so scared of him?" Mia asked irritably.

"I'm not scared of him, Mia, not anymore. But, I know the extent to which he can go to get what he wants, and its not a pretty sight when he finishes what he starts. What's worse is that you can't really bring him any harm. The man's a fucking heartless piece of shit with a lot of power." Kanou explained.

"He didn't strike me as such a man, Kanou-san. I don't expect such a man to go on so fondly about his wife. I'm sure you're mistaken."

Kanou felt like banging his head on the table, Mia was just not ready to accept the truth. "Well, then I'll just have to make Gerard tell you the truth, right?"

Mia nodded. She didn't know where this was going.

"Don't complain later, I'm warning you—you don't know what you're getting yourself into." He said as he finished his coffee.

"I won't. I don't care what happens." Mia said confidently.

"Great then, I'll show you his true colours soon, Mia." Kanou promised.

* * *

Tora Igarashi was having a good time. Work was going great and he was more than happy after scoring a profitable deal. He had been made the official CEO of the Igarashi Foundation recently, and he was very happy about it.

His secretary knocked on the doors when she got inside. She was polite and cute when she smiled.

"Mr Igarashi, the CEO of Walker Corporation has requested for a private meeting. It seemed urgent." She told him, "What should I say?"

"Sure, adjust my schedule accordingly." Tora said as he inwardly smiled. Wasn't Takumi the CEO now?

His smile vanished the moment the secretary went out. Why did he want to meet him? Hadn't they made a pact of never seeing each other again?

He was caught off guard when he saw Takumi walk into his office furiously. He had only gotten up to greet him but before he could have done that, Takumi held him by the collars and pinned him to the wall.

"You were given one thing to do Igarashi. One thing." He said angrily. Tora coughed as he gave him a toothy grin, "Fancy beard there, old friend."

"What was Misaki doing in my office, in front of me? And here I thought we had a pact?" Takumi smiled as he punched him.

* * *

 **||READ||REVIEW||FAVORITE||FOLLOW||**

I guess the next few chapters are going to be like rollercoaster rides, so embrace for the impact!

 **||MISS KIREI||**


	21. Chapter 21

**||~MY FUCKED UP HEART~||**

 **~Chapter 21~**

 **Blonde Hair**

 **MISAKI's POV**

I'm sick of waking up from the similar dreams all the time. Seriously! I never thought that I had the imagination of a pervert until I started to have these weird, over the top dreams, in it was the same man as always—tall, blonde, Japanese. I know it can't be true because Japanese don't really have blonde hair, at least us normal middle class people don't. I snicker as I look in the direction of the blonde goofball sitting next to me. Tora is the only one in our entire college with blonde hair.

But he's not even close to the faceless man that haunts me in my dreams. Damn it, is that man the man of my dreams? That sounds so stupid even in my head, I'd rather never speak of it out loud.

These dreams hadn't started to bother me,

Until yesterday, when I woke up from a sex dream.

My face had heated up from watching all the activities that took place in it. It was vivid and clear—like I was watching, rather—living in free porn. I didn't even want it. It left me shook in ways more than one, and I just wished to be able to see that man's face, but every time I wake up, I forget how it looks.

Sounds like a curse a fairy tale princess would get.

But, my life is no Disney movie. It is far from a fairy tale, which is why I get up to leave. My part-time jobs don't work themselves.

But the thought of the blonde-haired faceless man didn't really leave me for a long time. I realised that I had a thing for men with blonde hair the hard way…

"I have no feelings for you, Igarashi." I tell the asshole and he just gives me a look. We're drinking sake in a college party which I didn't agree to come to, but was dragged in. He snorts as he finishes the contents of his glass and I realise that something bad is going to come out of his rotten mouth the moment he sets the glass down. I look away with an annoyed look on my face when he grabs my wrists to make me look at him.

"Then prove it." He said and I grumbled, I was not up for silly games.

"I don't feel the need to prove anyone anything," I told him with a huff, I was late and drunk for the library.

"Sounds like something you would say." He looked at me, I sighed, "What do I have to do? To prove that I feel nothing for an asshole like you?"

"Kiss me." Tora challenged me. The nerve of that man!

But I felt nothing when I heard that, I was probably expecting it from him. And I saw no harm in doing that, it wasn't as if I was saving my first kiss for someone.

So I kissed him.

I knew I stunned him and myself too when I did that. But I didn't know why everyone was making a big deal out of it. Igarashi kissed girls every day, and I was sure that it must also be the same way around. I just didn't understand why everyone was looking at me in a stunned manner when I pulled away.

"There?" I asked if this was proof enough, but he seemed to be shocked. He didn't move away, or say something. I had to shake him.

"Wow, you really knocked up Igarashi huh…" Some girl said, "He didn't react like this when I kissed him. You must be special."

"I'm not special. I'm just…" I searched for the right words as I looked at my watch, "Late!"

I thought it was nothing, and it had nothing to do with the fact that I dismissed the mere idea of love and relationships. Those two things felt unwanted and useless to me. But Igarashi didn't seem to think so.

Which is why he thought that I wanted to pursue a romantic relationship with him. He started to avoid me as if I was a fan girl. Tch, I didn't even call him a friend, let alone think of him as a lover.

So I confronted him.

"Puts me at ease, the fact that you're not planning on ripping my clothes whenever you see me." He said with a smirk.

"You know that I don't believe in such things, Tora," I said seriously. "I have more important things to focus on, like my career. I have things to figure out, like Suzuna's college and other things… I don't even like the idea of falling in love with someone."

He seemed to have gotten quiet when I said that. He looked at me with sad eyes and gave me a 'hug', telling me that it's going to be alright as if I was the one who got all sad and emotional.

"But falling in love has nothing to do with ripping clothes apart," I had winked at him and he looked at me as if I'd assaulted him right there.

I am brought back to the present day reality when there is a knock on the door. I was supposed to be working on a case, not daydreaming about that blonde haired asshole.

Getting up to open the door, I realise that I am terribly dressed to be entertaining people in my office right now. Moreover, I am wondering why nobody told me I had a visitor.

But it's only Tora when I open the door. He chose to touch the strap of my nightie and put it back on my shoulder instead of saying hi. I can't help but give him a look, "Hello to you too, asshole."

"Wow, someone's being romantic tonight." He says back with a smirk.

"Shut up." I turn back and return back to my chair, and to the case at hand. I have people to put behind bars.

"Aren't you going to ask me how my trip was?" he says as he supports himself on my table, half sitting on it.

"Well, I would, if only you'd get your crotch out of my face." I pull my chair back with a grumble and he's still sitting there smirking. "How did it go?"

"Ehh." He made a face, "Nothing interesting happened."

"Why? Didn't you meet someone in the states?"

"I did, but they weren't you." He smiled, "I like my native things."

"I'm not your native thing. I could sue you for this." I say and he laughs, snatching away my file from my hands. "Look at me once, will you?" He smiled in such a way and I just had to look away in disgust, I can't help but laugh out loud.

"I got you something." He said as his hands went into his pockets, searching for whatever he got me.

"I told you not to go overboard for me," I said in advance.

"Well, they didn't have pills for cranky people, which is what I really wanted to get you." He snickered as if the joke was funny—if at all, and then showed me a box. "So I had to settle for this."

"What's in it? Don't even bother to ask me to marry you, it's a flat out no." I told him as plainly as I could because I know Tora has such tendencies. He was silent for a moment, but then he opened the box to show me a sleek bracelet.

"You think too highly of me." He smirks as he starts to put on that bracelet on me. The bracelet is a sleek chain of rose embellishments.

"I don't think I should take it, do you go insane while shopping for all of your friends?" I emphasise on the last word and give him a look, "Only the ones that come with extra benefits," He winks and I sigh, feeling weird all of a sudden.

"And how many of such friends do you have, Igarashi? Did you make more of such friends overseas while I was away?"

"Nah, there's only one. Sitting in a silk, strappy nightie in front of me, the straps of which, keep falling off." He tells me and gives me a look and I just feel…

"Don't be so cheesy, I'm not drunk enough for this." I tell him and I stand up all of a sudden, taking the bracelet off. He puts his hand on top of me, stopping me from taking the thing off. He's embracing me from back and I can feel his breathe on my neck. I open my mouth to say something but he sighs as he pushes my hair to the side. "Shut up Misaki, don't ruin it."

I rolled my eyes, and pushed him back, letting him fall down on my chair. He's looking at me breathlessly like that. I pretend to clear my throat, "Tora." I started off in a reprimanding tone, but he interrupts me again because my strap fell off again and he's putting it back for me. He lifts up my hand and puts it on top of his head—in his hair.

"You're not always supposed to question such moments Misaki." He said and I swear I saw him smile for a moment when my grip on his hair tightened, just a moment before he kissed me.

And then I kissed him back.

* * *

 **The Walker Mansion**

The maids stopped checking on him two hours ago. The office still kept calling him again and again, so he told his secretary to handle things with the help of Vice Chairman and to eat Gerard's head instead.

He was finally alone.

It was a strange turn of events that led Misaki straight to his office that day. He almost wanted to laugh, the one writing the story of his life was a mean, cruel person for sure. His smile vanish when he remembered how she looked that day.

He hadn't looked twice her way, but he the one time he did was more than enough to imprint the image on his brain. She had changed drastically, from dressing up as a tom boy who liked the clothes that were comfortable, she started dressing up as a woman.

The formal business suit fitted her body perfectly, and her hair was so long compared to the last time he had seen her—five years ago. He was glad there was no blood on her body like the last time. He laughed.

"I have developed a sick sense of humour." He told himself as he looked in the mirror.

He wondered if she had changed the course of time though. Did she still have a low tolerance to alcohol and men like before? He wished she did.

If Mia grew her hair longer, they both would look the same.

It was surely a small world, and it seemed like God had run out of faces when he made Mia. Why did they resemble so much?

Why did Mia always remind him that he was a failure?

Why did her face remind him of blood and heartache?

He was sick of being this way, he wished for a simpler life—one in which he wasn't treated like a celebrity, in which he was able to live with the one he loved, in which he didn't have a fucked up family, and a brother like Gerard.

"I should just run away and become a waiter in some restaurant or something." He wondered, and then the thought didn't seem too insane to him.

The only problem was that people would recognize him too quickly, and Gerard would stalk him till the end of the world.

He started laughing out loud. The sound of his laughter echoed through the entire room, it was almost sickening.

He remembered Tora's face all of a sudden. That bastard had promised him that he would take care of everything. It seemed like he didn't do a very good job at that.

Takumi stood up and picked up his jacket. Filled with rage and frustration, he drove straight to Igarashi's office. Tora had been given the charge of the office some time ago, he read. It was time for him to give him a welcoming present.

When he saw Tora's face, everything else blacked out. It was just him and his anger, and Tora's confused face. He seemed to have greeted him with a smile, but that was cleared out the moment his fist landed on Tora's face.

Bastard.

Tora fell back on the floor, and Takumi held him by the collar, panting. "Didn't you say that you and I were to swap roles? I don't see you doing a very good job playing your part?" He asked with a smile as he punched him again. Due to the ruckus created, the bodyguards came inside the office and started to get Takumi off Tora's back. Tora's face bled and he looked scared. "Takumi can you just calm down for a second?!" He yelled as the bodyguards held Takumi by the arms, he resisted and the men started to have a hard time controlling him. Tora sighed as he placed his white handkerchief on his chin, which turned crimson in seconds.

"Close the door." He told his men, who followed. The rest of the office didn't necessarily have to see this happen. Not to mention the hungry media.

After a few minutes, he managed to make Takumi calm enough to have him sit down and talk with him. He looked angry and not in the mood for any jokes, which seemed so unlike him.

He'd changed.

He felt bad looking at the man in front of him. What had he turned into?

"So, how are you?" Tora asked as he patted his cheek with an ice pack. Takumi scowled at that, "What was Misaki doing in Walker Corp.?"

"What do you mean?" Tora asked as he took off his wrist watch and cleaned the blood from his wrist.

"Weren't you too ambitious Igarashi? Telling me that you could take care of her, and keep her away from me that night… Has the passage of five years blurred your memories?" He asked spitefully. Tora couldn't help but feel hurt at the sound of such a vicious voice.

Takumi seemed to have turned into a man like Gerard and his past self.

He didn't like that.

"Look, she doesn't even remember you, okay? In the five years that I have known her, she hasn't even mentioned your name. I bet she didn't even know that you'd be there or that you own Walker Corp. so stop overreacting, okay? She didn't even mention you to me." He tried to reason with him the best he could, but Takumi didn't really feel satisfied.

"So its sheer coincidence that she was assigned a case against Walker Corp?"

"Of course, if it were something, she would have mentioned it to me." Tora reassured him, "Anyway, how have you been?" He asked politely. The bodyguards eyed Takumi, who was comfortably sitting next to Tora, with a glass of whiskey in his hand.

Takumi chuckled, "I didn't come here for small talks. I came here to remind you of the promise that you made."

"I understand that, but why do you have to be so bitter about it?" Tora said he could see a reflection of his past self in Takumi.

"It's just how I am now," Takumi said with a smirk. "Don't like it?"

"Don't you want to know what all happened in the last five years when you were not in her life?" Tora asked and Takumi almost stopped drinking. He stood up abruptly and looked away.

"It doesn't bother me, so why would I want to listen to it? Time is money, and I want to waste neither yours nor mine. Have a nice day, Igarashi."

Tora sighed as he saw Takumi's retreating form. He was like a completely different person altogether now. So bitter, so angry.

"I wish you peace and sanity, Walker." He said quietly to himself as he leaned back and stared at the ceiling.

"Even when you two are poles apart, you both seem to gravitate back towards each other… It's disgusting to watch how your lives are intertwined. After all this time, I still envy you, Takumi." Tora smiled to himself. Even after all the years, all the changes, the alterations in their fate, he realised that he could never truly swap places with Takumi.

Because they both were just meant to be, no matter what.

* * *

Misaki found herself standing in front of a medical clinic. The name "Kanou Soutaro" shone bright and she felt happy that her friend became a successful man. She saw many awards and accolades in the waiting lobby.

She suddenly felt like she missed out on a lot of things when she was away from her friends and her family. She still didn't know why she went out of Japan, but ever since that accident, she had started to feel out of place so she just couldn't stay. Little did she realise that that feeling of incompleteness wouldn't abandon her no matter where she moved to or what she did.

"I would like to request an informal appointment with Dr Soutaro. I'm just an old friend, not here for a session or anything." Misaki smiled at the secretary, who nodded and told her to sit.

Misaki took out her phone from her purse while she waited. There were a lot of pending emails that she had to attend to, no matter what. She was thankful for the little waiting time she got, it allowed her to sort through the emails so that she could peacefully reply to them later on.

When Kanou saw Misaki standing in his office, he felt like laughing with all of the Gods that had conspired to arrange such a series of events. Was this a joke?!

He smiled, even when he internally asked himself why he was caught up in all of Misaki and Takumi's business.

It was because of that bastard Gerard, he decided. Yes, everything was his fault.

Kanou felt self-conscious standing in front of Ayuzawa. This woman was the same girl who straightened out all the male population of the high school. She looked pretty in the raven business suit and her hair was held in a tight ponytail.

She had grown out her hair too.

"What brings you by, Misaki-san?" he asked politely.

Misaki smiled as she sat down on the couch, "I was just passing by, so I thought I should come and see you while I was in Japan."

"How long are you here?" he asked as two mugs of coffee was placed on the table by his assistant.

"I don't know, I am working on a few cases here." Kanou flinched when she said that, "But I can't seem to understand the scenario very well." She confessed as she took a sip of her coffee.

"I read that you've worked as a human rights lawyer that brought you a lot of glories." Kanou said with a smile, "I feel very thankful that I got to know such an amazing woman like you." He confessed with a smile.

"So, it seems like you don't have any problems talking to women now?" Misaki said, causing the both of them to laugh.

"Did you find someone yet?" Misaki asked him out of nowhere. Kanou sat up straighter, "Well, there have been some…" Misaki smiled widely at that, "But I don't think I've found the one yet." He finished, "What about you?"

"Oh, me" She chuckled, "Ah, dating is a part of life I didn't pay attention to. I don't really have the time since I'm always travelling." She told him.

"Sounds like an excuse to me." Kanou said with a smirk, Misaki felt cornered, so she laughed it off, "Well, it's just same for me like you—I haven't found the one yet."

Kanou felt saddened when he heard that, she didn't even remember having the "one" to herself and then losing him, just because of some family drama.

"Don't worry, you'll find him someday." Kanou smiled.

When it was time for Misaki to go, she apologized for leaving early, with a promise of meeting him again. She told him that she wanted to talk to him about something later. He felt a rush of mixed emotions as he saw her leave. What had time done to all of them? Everyone looked better with time, but everyone got more fucked up with it as well. He stared at the blue sky, feeling empty.

* * *

 **GERARD's PLACE**

"I want to throw a party!" Gerard exclaimed out a sudden as he raised his wine glass up. "A charity event, perhaps?" Gerard smiled as he turned to Mia.

Mia merely rolled her eyes, she was babysitting Gerard again, making sure that he doesn't do anything stupid to fuck things up, and trying to get out some info from him as always.

"You seem to like parties." She said, and he nodded.

"Of course. They're for a good cause, people get to dress up, meet and greet, and there's free alcohol for everyone. This also gives me a chance to see my wife, which I haven't in a long while now." He said, not really minding sharing personal things with Mia.

Mia sighed as she looked around Gerard's lavish hotel suite. "What about the money that goes into planning these things up?"

"Money is never an issue if it is for a good cause. And how about you plan this up?" He smirked, this way he wouldn't have to do anything.

"Me? I have zero experience with these type of things." She said truthfully, not wanting to be the one everyone yells at if something at the party goes wrong.

"Perfect, that'll spice things up. You're planning this event. We'll raise donations for all the charity foundations listed under Walker Corp. I'll share contacts of all the A-listers I know, we'll raise a shit load of money overnight, Mia. Be excited! You need more colour in your cheeks!"

Mia looked Gerard strangely, well this was the most energetic she had seen him. She couldn't help but smile a little, looking at how excited he got.

Gerard smiled as he emptied his glass and picked up his phone, "Cedric, come by, will you? We have a lot to plan~" He rambled on the phone and Mia giggled looking at him, for the first time in a long while, she was able to completely forget about the pain in her heart.

"Now, here's my card, use it for all the shopping that you need to do. All the payments for the arrangements and whatever you need it for, go all out, I don't care. Just make sure it's the best event I've ever been to." He said as he tossed her one of his cards carelessly as he dialled a number on his phone.

Mia caught the card too cautiously, which seemed to glow even in normal light. She had never owned a platinum card, let alone used one. She sighed, looking at Gerard's recklessness, "You're an idiot."

"Excuse me?" Gerard turned and looked at her. He was offended.

Mia gulped, "I mean—Mr Walker, isn't it too careless of you to hand me a platinum card and tell me to go all out? I could empty your pocket for all you know!" She chided him the best she could, without getting on his bad side, of course.

"Ah, you're cute and naïve to think that it is the only card that I own," Gerard said, pointing to a drawer where he kept a bundle of such cards. "And Mia, you can't empty my pocket even if you try—do you even know how much I make?"

"Not much, considering how you're always spending your day drinking and dragging me to your office, not letting me work too."

"Ouch, well, I am earning more than you imagine every second of the day, even if I don't work to show for it." He said with pride and Mia rolled her eyes, "Looks like you throw all the work on your brother's shoulder and get drunk."

Gerard was angry for a moment, but he merely laughed, "You think of me as a freeloader? Well, Mia" He called her in a taunting manner, "I've been working my ass off since I was fourteen, just to maintain the number one spot of the Walker Corp, unlike my pretty brother who spent his high-school and young adult life wandering the streets of Tokyo free-minded, chasing the girl he was in love with as if he was the main character of some romantic manga." He felt his anger rising up, thinking back to those moments,

"While he slept peacefully in his bare apartment, I worked twenty hours a day. If it weren't for my heart condition that time, I still would be doing the same, never letting Takumi even touch the empire I built ever so carefully, with my blood, sweat, and my health. As if I would even let his ungrateful ass belittle the Walker Corporation as he does now. He's been given everything so easily, at what cost? Nothing!"

Mia fell silent when she heard this, she couldn't imagine how hard it must have been for Gerard to be the heir of the Walker Corporation since he was a little child. She felt glad to not be born in a royal family, but at the same time, she felt like the Takumi he talked about was someone else.

"It must have been hard for you, to sacrifice everything for your business."

"Well I love it, I love the Walker Corporation with all my blood and bones, because I was building it when I was supposed to fall in love with someone. It's not my fault and I'm not even sorry for being a bitter man—I know I'm called that" he eyed her, "But it's okay. So what if I didn't fall in love like a romantic fool Takumi was." Mia's heart broke at the mention of Takumi being a romantic fool—she just couldn't imagine that.

"I'm sorry, it's not my place to say anything, but I just feel like you loved your work so much that when you even got the chance to know love, you just chose your work over love."

"Don't say such things when you don't even know how it was," Gerard said.

"Well, I may not know how it was, but it's not like you're spending a lot of time with your wife when you do have the time? If you earn a lot of money every moment now, without even working for it, then why don't you talk to her often?"

Gerard fell silent, "Because there are far more things that I have to tend to, Mia. You won't understand."

"I don't want to understand, damn it." Mia left her cool for a moment, "Get your shit together, Gerard." Gerard's eyes widened at that, "If you love your wife as you proclaim, then go get her. You have to put effort in your relationships the way your put effort in your work. She's not going to know automatically that you love her or you miss her if you're going to sit in this lavish empty room all day and get wasted till you can't remember the responsibilities you're running from!" She panted when she finished, and by the time she looked at him to give him an angry look, Gerard was standing on his feet, with his eyes wide open.

Her eyes widened when she realised she had gone too far, "I don't even feel sorry for saying this, Gerard, but you're lonely. Face it. You searched for a friend in me, which is why you make me sit with you all day, because you know that I'm not clever enough to plan something against you—so you find me harmless. But as a friend, I need to give you a splash of your reality! You're not getting any younger sitting here, so you might as well start working on your relationships—be it your brother or your wife, damn it! I don't want to even see your face if you're just going to sit here and do nothing about your crumbling life when you still have a shot at making things right!"

Mia felt spent and teary when she finished. Gerard looked like nobody had the guts to say this to him before. He was shocked, and Mia was too angry to look at him, so she stormed out of his suite.

He looked at the phone in his hands, wherein a picture of Charlotte smiling lived.

He still had a shot at everything.

He still did.

* * *

 **||READ~REVIEW~FAVOURITE~FOLLOW||**

Hey guys, how was the chapter?

I wanted to tell you all that My Fucked Up Heart is about to reach completion. I think it will go till chapter 30. The pace is finally picking up and I know that I just snatched a whole lot of ground from beneath your feet. Did you enjoy the ride this chapter was? I hope you did, because this ride will continue in the next chapter, so see you there!

I'll reply to all reviews collectively in the next chapter.

Can't wait to find out what you guys think!

 **||MISS~KIREI||**


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